AIBU to wear a floral dress my brother's girlfriend calls white to their wedding? Part 2.

[princesspicker]

Old thread nearly full. Some of you are saying if people had seen the dress straight away the votes would be 99% against me, let’s see about that. At least half the other thread say it’s fine to wear this dress.

From the old thread:

My brother is getting married in three weeks and I’ve bought a fairly expensive dress for his wedding.

The dress: https://www.hobbs.com/product/carly-floral-dress/0126-5675-9022L00-CREAM-MULTI.html

BD’s gf (bride) saw a dress that is similar to my dress. She saw it at my mum’s. It has a pattern but with short sleeves and some ruffle. It is one of my dresses and I had left it at my mums house. It is not the dress I’ll wear for the wedding.

She called that dress white even though it has a pattern. She told mum that it would be inappropriate to wear for the wedding day. Mum and I think she pretended to think it was one of my mum’s options, since it was clearly not something mum would wear anywhere.

This all happened because my mum was showing her all the dress options she had in mind for herself for the wedding.

When bride raised this with mum, mum told her not to worry because she (mum) won’t wear white.

Which is true regardless of if you say the dress is white or cream or whatever.

After this happened, my brother started asking everyone what they would be wearing.

Old thread: www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5546975-aibu-to-wear-a-floral-dress-my-brothers-girlfriend-calls-white-to-their-wedding

So what’s the issue then? 2 entire thread based on your SIL not asking you to not wear a particular dress, or expressing any opinion about that dress whatsoever 😂

Why is this dull, non-issue getting a second thread?

Hiding thread so I don’t have to see it.

I’m not sure why you’re being so combative.

I think the dress is fine but your DB and SiL don’t. Check it with them.

Then wear something else. Why be unkind.

She tried to send a message through mum. If she can’t come straight to me about it why should I change anything? So entitled!

Get a grip OP. You clearly don’t like the woman but as you’ll be family for the next 50 years it might be an idea to wind your neck in.

I'm sorry, you're arguing with strangers on the internet over a dress, refusing to send a picture of said dress to your brother because deep down you KNOW it's unacceptable, you're slagging off your soon to sister in law, saying it's partly your Mum's wedding because she's given them some money and yet YOU think the BRIDE is entitled? Clearly a troll or someone with a total lack of insight.

Oh and she probably doesn't want to come straight to you because she knows you'll act like this so she's asked your brother to deal with you and I don't blame her. You sound awful.

Personally I think it's fine for a wedding. However, it's not my opinion that matters. If the bride doesn't like it,you don't wear it. It's not rocket science.
It does look as if you're deliberately taking a stand against your sil. No idea why, but it won't go well and you and your mum will be on the shitty end of the fallout.

Just wear the fucking dress. I can guarantee it’s going to be the absolute least of your worries in terms of your future relationship with your brother and SIL. But as you clearly don’t care whether you have a relationship with them or not, then it’s all irrelevant anyway!

Are you joking? Surely no-one could really be as unpleasant and spiteful as you are making yourself out to be. I don’t think it’s the bride who is the "entitled" one (though as it’s HER WEDDING she has the right to be).

If there were such words as SILzilla and MILzilla I think you and your mother would qualify!

Rude!

Oh I think they have a point

Why are you not replying to the people suggesting you send them a picture of your dress to see what they say? They might even say ‘oh yeah that’s fine’ and then all the drama would have been for nothing?

unless you just actually enjoy all the drama?

She's posted a picture already

Lovely dress perfect for a wedding guest imo especially with the deep pink jacket and accessories.
Do B&G's seriously ask their guests to send links to their outfits for approval these days 🤦‍♀️
Hopefully on the day SIL will be too consumed enjoying her day to worry about what OP is wearing.

I know, I meant send it to her brother/future sil

I don’t think I should have to ask permission for what to wear. It is ridiculous that they are trying to police our clothes via mum anyway.

They have said the dress code is formal. I’ve bought a formal dress.

Why would she be trying to send you a message if she has no idea what dress you are planning to wear?

It's still the same answer. The bride has made it clear she doesn't want people wearing a white dress with patterns on which is what your dress is. It has also become clear on this thread that you don't like your soon to be sil and think she's being a bridezilla. Personally I would respect the brides wishes but you are not going to so go ahead and wear it and stop making fucking threads about it.

Not to her Sil and DB.

Do you want to wear your dress or do you potentially want to forever ruin your relationship with your brother and his wife? Because if you show up in that dress & your brother and SIL are upset with you, you might not have much of a relationship going forward.

Because the dress she saw looks nothing like what my mum wears. It is obvious that it is my dress.

Come off it OP. My MiL asked what my mum was wearing so they didn’t match. It’s being considerate.

A friend asked me if she could wear the dress she planned to because it was a bit white. I said it was fine.

Isn’t it a bit immature to fall out because of a nice dress that a guest wears? A guest that is part of the groom’s family. We don’t spend much time together as it is as they don’t make the effort.

I’m not sure you’re in the best position to criticise anyone’s maturity OP.