AIBU to wear a floral dress my brother's girlfriend calls white to their wedding?

[princesspicker]

My brother is getting married in three weeks and I’ve bought a fairly expensive dress for his wedding. His gf saw my dress and said she thought it was inappropriate because she claims it’s white. The reality is that it’s not white, it has a red and green floral pattern. I don’t really have time to find a new dress but my brother keeps asking me if I’ve found something new, saying he and his gf are worried other guests will talk about me behind my back if I show up wearing something white (it’s not white!!). I think it’s so rude that they’re trying to police what I wear, especially when they know I had to call off my wedding last year and he’s my brother so I should get to wear something special to his wedding!

What does me liking her got to do with anything? i’m not the one marrying her!

I am also getting married soon and if my future sister in law referred to me as her brother’s ‘girlfriend’ I would be furious. It’s disrespectful.

So is the background colour of the dress white?

You know that in that case it wouldn't be them making demands about what you wear but expecting you to follow normal wedding protocol.

Agree. Or a wind up. Can't be real.

As a sister of the groom, you're going to be in a lot of the wedding photos.
Why would you risk causing a falling out with your family by wearing something the bride and groom think is inappropriate for their wedding, their special day?

If your dress is similar to one the bride thinks is too white then you better go shopping for another colour, you're not a nice person if you turn up wearing something you know will upset your brother and sil.

Your wedding not going ahead has nothing to do with any of this.
Your mum paying for some of the wedding has nothing to do with any of this.

Be a decent person and wear a different coloured dress to your brother's wedding.

Just post the dress if you’re actually interested in opinions

A white dress with a floral pattern on it is still a white dress
It isn't. A white dress with a floral pattern is not a white dress by the usual definitions of anyone sensible who is either organising or attending a wedding.

This nonsense that white means anything that with any hint of white at all is very silly and pandering to it just creates even more bridezillas.

Because it's not about you, you'll go with bad grace and spoil it for everyone, you're arguing with us already.

I'm having trouble believing this.

That's ridiculously thin-skinned of you.

Nonsense. They don't get to approve/disapprove all their guests clothing.

The bride needs to make her escape now before she marries into this madness.

Hilarious.

@princesspicker For goodness sake!

The bride has said that she does NOT want you wearing the dress you are planning to wear. Have some respect and get another dress. You're not posting a pic because you KNOW it's too white. Quit the 'she's a bridezilla' kind of attitude. It's HER wedding, not YOURS. Why do sisters, sister in laws, and mother-in-laws do this shit at weddings? You have main character syndrome. Pack it in. It's not your wedding!!!

It's not "all their guests", it's the sister of the groom.

Wear whatever you like, OP. Go for the original dress if you want.
Have the courage of your convictions and style it out. But it might be prudent to be prepared for the fallout.

I got married today

i wouldn’t have given a toss about being called a partner/girlfriend, I’ve been with my now husband 10years this autumn

you need to honestly not wind yourself up about others people.

DO NOT WEAR THAT DRESS

If she hasn’t seen it, she won’t know it’s the one she asked you not to wear, so just wear it.

or - regardless of your feelings, you’re going to have to see this women at many Christmases etc for years to come, so maybe don’t p her off now.

Is there some particular reason that you want to piss her off and upset her on her wedding day?

Congratulations 🥂

Hmmmm, good question!

Congratulations 🌷🥂🍾

So are most people - including the op! 😂

The gf saw op's dress, that was actually the mum's dress, that was a bit similar, but different, that wasn't white, except for the white bits, because the gf is nosy and op should be allowed to feel special as her wedding was cancelled and her mum has contributed.

Hopefully that clarifies things! 😁

It’s a dress…

Bride doesn’t like it, has said so indirectly to you via your mother.

Ergo you have 2 options:
1: wear said dress out of some weird kind of spite and ruin that relationship entirely with her and make things incredibly awkward for your brother and mother at all subsequent family events.

2: suck it up and get a new dress (that isn’t white) that the bride won’t be upset by on her wedding day, keeping the peace with them and making everyone’s lives and the wedding day itself a lot more drama free.

I know which option I’d go for….