To cancel date over his ‘joke’?

[Datingwoee]

5th date tomorrow night with a man who has been great up to now. I’ve had to push the time back by an hour - said I’ll need extra time to freshen up after work. His reply to me was: “No worries, can’t be having a whiffy growler lol”.

Is that date cancelling worthy or am I being a bit too harsh?

I would as im not clenched up.
I like a humor and a laugh.
Tbh it is funny.

If it was only meant as a joke then i would probably share similar humour.

Haha yes! JAY!!😍

No, you're not. I did too. And my husband did. And my mate 🤣 Men ARE juvenile and a bit daft. It's a daft comment. Not a hanging offence

I was going to say the exact same. If, during your other dates, you’ve both been using g this kind of language (and therefore he thought it was appropriate based on your other chats) then crack on. If his ‘joke’ is totally out of the blue, then I’d cancel the date. It would give me the ick.

When people say 'freshen up' that always makes me think theyre talking about washing their bits 🤣 i dont know why! But it makes me hate it when people use that phrase. Maybe he sees it the same way 🤣

But yea- pretty gross to say that tbh. I'd be put off.

None of us want to go near smelly genitals, that’s obvious. I think everyone can assume the OP is an adult woman who knows how to manage her own hygiene.

So it’s just the fact he called it a growler that was your issue?

Lots of people use funny names for genitalia.
It’s to show it’s just a joke.

what ? Who says that, I’m off to freshen uo meaning I’m off to wash my fanny??

I’m not “clenched up” either and most people “like a laugh”. I just don’t think its funny.

You can get away with a dirty joke with someone you know really well, or if it’s genuinely funny.

A tired stereotype about a vagina, delivered to someone who you don’t know well but have had sex with is puerile and disrespectful.

Round my way, a growler is a pie so I'd have thought that's what the pub poster meant! (never heard the vulgar reference until this thread).

I love a man that makes me laugh. This comment would be a deal breaker for me only because It would stick in my mind he actually thought like that 😳

If i took mumsnet dating advice i would be single forever and never have sex.
Bloody hell some on hear need to get of their high horse and take a joke.

🤮 I love a joke/ banter but this is revolting and would make me drier than the Sahara

Fucking gross

Get over ya self.
It`s a joke.

Horrible

Maybe it’s better than shagging blokes who refer to your growler.

There are loads of men who do things a lot worse than this, and yet, their partners don’t break up with them.

Sorry but this has to be one of the most ridiculous comments on the thread. The fact that some women put up with a lot worse from men means all women have to accept childish, puerile attempts at humour/seduction? Raise your bar FGS!

Yes its either grim comments about women's fannies being smelly or no sex for the rest of your life.

Those are the ONLY two options. 🙄

Good grief

It`s mumsnet everything a man does or says will be offensive.

Even though OP brought it up first?

I wouldn’t think anything about talking to someone about their sweaty balls.

I would have found his comment funny and I definitely wouldn’t cancel a date over it.

Stop now

Well apart from the fact that his choice of words would have given me the ick on it's own, because it's crude and gross from someone you've only met four times, what would put me right off would be that that was his first and immediate thought. It tells you what's uppermost in his mind and if all he wants is sex then it's not a relationship I would want.

Me too. It's daft!

I’d just point out (in person) that you found that joke a bit crude and maybe that’s a level of language to save for jokes with male friends. We can all be guilty of not reading the room so don’t hate him completely. It’s not a funny comment but if he’s otherwise a nice guy give him a chance.

Of course if he gets the arse and makes it about you being ‘sensitive’ then give him the immediate heave-ho. The only right response is a bit of apologetic humility and a good natured sorry.