DH being an ungrateful **** or is it me?

[Fathersdaycry]

DH moaned he didn’t get a breakfast in bed today. Fair enough I could have thought of that but it’s been a stressful few days for other reasons. This seemed to set the tone for the day. He moaned the table at the pub we booked was outside and too hot. DS shouldn’t have got him a big bar of chocolate as it will just melt this week and he doesn’t want to eat it in one go today (he doesn’t keep chocolate in the fridge).

He has had a couple of drinks tonight which he doesn’t usually do on a Sunday night and I’ve come upstairs after he’s insinuated he ‘deserves’ a particular sex act to salvage the day (something I am not against doing but only with some notice for his birthday etc).

I feel like he has been totally ungrateful - nice cards, chocolates, a meal out, dinner cooked at home etc.

Father's Day involves having children.
Perhaps OP dresses up as a schoolgirl/boy ?

Totally agree. As a man myself I'd tell him to grow a pair and grow up .

Bloody hell! An apology. I never got a spontaneous apology from my ex. It’s amazing how much I’m impressed by it and just reminded about how low the bar is for men. 😔

This made me laugh so much 😆 The whole thread is absolutely brilliant!

I wish my wife would do a particular sex act with notice. 😁

There is nothing more unattractive than a grown adult acting like a sulky child.

Imagine if DS acted like a spoilt brat because he was given breakfast in bed.

My DCs have never acted like this.

I would read him the riot act and tell him how disgusting his behaviour was and what an awful role model he has been for his child.

I would be reducing the effort you make in order for him to teach DCs to be grateful for small efforts.

Your kids are going to grow up being very spoilt and entitled if this is their role model.

Ew. Go away!!

Is he your dad too?

Yeah for some reason my first thought was it was for constipation, evacuating the bowels ahead of the act etc, but I remembered it is, as you say, for the opposite purpose. It’s shocking women have to do this for a load of discomfort and zero pleasure themselves. At least if gay men do it they have a chance of enjoying it due to the prostate. No chance men would ‘prepare’ themselves for a woman.

Also, taking Imodium if you don’t have diarrhoea isn’t good for anyone, and my guess could be the women suffer from constipation as a result.

Another example of women putting men before themselves and men literally not giving a shit!

How about 80 years?

Wow, what a guy. So he moaned all the way through your day too?

I'm a bit unbothered about breakfast in bed and the "I've had a rubbish day but everything will be OK if we have birthday sex" is unattractive. However, I could not be married to someone who complains their bar of chocolate is too big!

Yuck....not even birthdays or Christmas for me. I was thinking a BJ 😂

Glad to read he apologised, and that you didn't let yourself be pressured into that sex act. Sounds like the heat was getting to him.... here's hoping he avoids giving such a perfect imitation of an asshole in the future.

Sorry OP, he sounds horrendous. Wanted a particular sex act to salvage the day? Fucking hell, is he a caveman or what. Crumbs, I am so glad I am single, I could not be putting up with that utter bullshit.

I found out yesterday that men don’t even have to go through the digital prostate exam anymore! That was one thing you could at least say - ok men have something uncomfortable and embarrassing that they have to go through as a medical screening - true women have their vaginas and breasts probed and manhandled, and men usually have to wait til they’re 50, compared with almost 3 decades earlier for women having to start their smear tests - but they were having to endure something unpleasant, so it wasn’t as if they had it all plain sailing in terms of horrible routine medical checks.

Now it’s a blood test.

A blood test.

Of course I’m not wishing prostate cancer on anyone, but it feels like yet another win if you were born with a penis instead of a vagina.

My first reaction was - so they’re probably worried that men are dying from this disease and the thing that’s preventing them from getting tested is the embarrassment and discomfort of the test - “scientists - do something! Find ANOTHER way!!!” Now it’s a blood test.

If it saves lives - obv great. But how many centuries did it take for men to agree to actually bother studying women’s bodies? It’s like the whole plain relief thing - women are sometimes given less than men bc they’re expected to tolerate pain better than them - so why waste stronger meds on women?

Also periods, pregnancy and childbirth are seen as preparing women for intense pain and discomfort. It’s like oh well women don’t like it either (never mind the thousand s who die from not being tested due to similar reasons as men) but more of them do, so it’s not that pressing an issue. So why waste precious money investigating how we can test without sticking a speculum up their vagina and swabbing them/ scraping them/ having a good rummage round? They’ll put up with it tho won’t they, bless them. For victims of sexual abuse and pregnancy issues this is so psychologically as well as physically traumatic. But we have to do it.

I know they’re different diseases and there’s probably no way of an alternative method for women, it just seems that once again men’s needs are prioritised whereas women are expected to put up and shut up. Or die I guess.

The answer to that sex request is "you're not my dad". He's an ungrateful prick

I’m cracking up 🤣🤣🤣

And there went spitty breadcrumbs all over my laptop😂

I think in Australia Father’s Day is also known as BBQ & BJ Day.
I’m open to corrections!

Tesco. Yep the real deal Terry's. They had them a few days ago at my local express shop.

Its a bit disturbing that he links sex to Fathers day. Forever ick.

Glad that he apologised.

I hope he doesn't have one of those days often.

I hope you can put to him how his behaviour made you feel and how unacceptable he was yesterday. An apology can sometimes be the easy way out of actually thinking about what is and isn't ok and what he values as a father and a DH.

If I contrast this to my relationship, we are both just grateful for any effort made. Not perfect either in terms of marking important dates as we both have busy lives. If one feels disappointed about level of effort we might mention it a few days later but not in an emotional way. And there is never any expectation in terms of being 'owed' any sexual activity or act.

Okay there's all this sex talk, but I can't get over him complaining about a big bar of chocolate. It's even better if it's threatening to melt, that's a good excuse to eat it all at once!