AIBU to struggle with neighbours' children screaming while working from home?

[fld]

One of the few things I am not looking forward to the next few days are screaming kids.

Two families that moved late last year and earlier this year have 5-6 kids between them and all they do is scream! They run outside and scream. As the properties are in an odd shaped quadrangle, their screams bounce off the walls. Making the screaming even more intense. The kids’ ages, c3-9 years old.

My job is hybrid, so didn’t get this issue last summer as properties the kids live in - one didn’t have kids and the other had kids and behaved.

I had to close a window to keep the screaming down. There is no way I would close a window when it’s 31c.

I do wish parents would tell their kids that screaming is not acceptable. My work is two thirds on calls ti various customers, other staff in other departments and my team’s colleagues. I can hear the screaming from wearing the call headset.

Any tips will be appreciated

These mumsnet posts always kill me. Its the comments from the clearly post menopausal women who have obviously forgotten what it is like to have young children 🤣 'little shits', 'brats', 'crap parents' 'entitled' etc. I grew up in the late 80s/90s, in a relatively affluent area, everyone was playing in the gardens and the streets. I do not recall anyone's mum coming out, even once, to tell us to stop it. I don't believe these children are continously screaming for 2 hours everyday either. If they were then you could make a noise complaint to the council, who would check if the noise was indeed exceeding a certain number of decibels. I think it far more likely its loud because there are 6 of them. For the record, I do ask my toddlers to quieten down if they are being too loud, but it never lasts, because they are toddlers and they have no impulse control. Their pre frontal cortex wont be fully developed until they are 25. I think you would have more of a case of if it was early morning or later at night, but the middle of the day, I doubt it. Put the headphones on and close you window. Or as some people suggested blast music at full pelt, just remember you will have to listen to it too and im sure that was also disturb your work. You may even end up with a noise complaint.....

Get a fan and noise cancelling headphones

Ageist much?? I'm pretty sure at least one pp has talked in the present tense about not letting their children scream incessantly, so that shoots something of a hole in your argument.

Impressively original using the prefrontal cortex as an excuse to not bother parenting properly, though.

Exactly.
No kid I knew growing up was allowed to shriek and scream constantly.

Parents bang on about how it "takes a village" when it suits them. Well a village is EVERYONE. If you can't be mindful of other people in your vicinity, don't be surprised if the one time you desperately need them they turn their back on you.

One person stated they currently had kids did they? Oh wow that really shoots my argument down, youre right🤣 As for the pre frontal cortex, thats just a fact. I would suggest your generation knew very little about child development, hence the inappropriate name calling of children and derogatory unfounded comments about today's parents and your assumption that they are not parenting properly.

A village isnt 'everyone'. Certainly not in the modern world. My 'village' consistents of my family and friends. My elderly neighbour frequently offers to help as well. I would not be asking some random person on the street who calls children's names and thinks they should be quiet in the middle of the afternoon for help, ever. Having said that, I did specifically state that I do try to quiet my children when they are getting too rowdy, however, im realistic in that they are under 5 and struggle to keep quiet for hours on end.

If you try and quiet them when they are too rowdy, then this thread and my comment isn't about you

I'd imagine if you were the type of parent to just let them screech, your lovely elderly neighbour wouldn't be offering any help, but it sounds like you are mindful of others

Yes I am mindful of others but my point is, despite that, children are still noisy. My neighbour actually discourages me from quieting them as she believes children should be allowed to be children. I know this thread isnt about me. My original comment noted that I highly doubt the children are just consistently screaming for 2 hours every afternoon, I suspect it is noisy because there are 6 children as oppossed to the children being 'little shits' with lazy parents. Ultimately there is little the poster can do other than buy headphones and close her window.

Yes I am mindful of others but my point is, despite that, children are still noisy. My neighbour actually discourages me from quieting them as she believes children should be allowed to be children. I know this thread isnt about me. My original comment noted that I highly doubt the children are just consistently screaming for 2 hours every afternoon, I suspect it is noisy because there are 6 children as oppossed to the children being 'little shits' with lazy parents. Ultimately there is little the poster can do other than buy headphones and close her window.

'My generation'? You don't even know how old I am, you have no way of knowing what life experiences 'clearly post menopausal women' 🙄 - or women of any age - have had, and you've clearly been reading this thread very selectively what with all the denial that some children do indeed engage in protracted intolerable screaming, not to mention the tired old straw man argument that because people object to said screaming they think they should be 'quiet in the middle of the afternoon'. As I said upthread, literally no one is saying that.🙄

If you don't feel it's relevant that one person on the thread who is currently a parent has said she doesn't let her kids scream in that way, that's your prerogative. But numerous posters (and statistically I imagine some of them are likely to be more recent parents), have said they didn't let their children indulge in protracted ear-splitting screaming either. No doubt it suits your narrative to assume the screaming isn't happening and that those who discourage their kids from doing it are crumbly old crones who think children should be seen and not heard, but I strongly suspect some of them will be closer to your age than you might think.

And I don't understand your defensiveness on this thread given that you claim to be quieting them when necessary. As a pp said, if you're doing that then you're not one of those being complained about, so it's difficult to understand why you seem so irate about the thread and what is fuelling the rank ageism of some of your comments.

Wow, calm down 😂 I can take an educated guess at your age given your use of language and the tone of your wall of text. Regardless, I am not irate or defensive, at all, you are. It may come as a surprise to you, but just because I quieten my own children down it doesn't automatically mean I think children shouldn't scream. Both things can exist at once. I did actually read the entire thread, and as most mumsnets posts are, its full of older women ascertaining how they were great parents and parents today are lazy and entitled, and their children are little shits. I am sure some women on here are my age, not sure what the relevance is though. At no point did I say every single person commenting was older. Anyway, I hope you feel better getting all of that off your chest, have a nice day.

I've never liked screaming children, even when I was one myself! So quit with the ageism too.

Wall of text?? 😄 I know it's a hot day, but back in the dark ages where I am evidently from, we used to have these things called attention spans and we just used to call it communicating.

(I'd be riveted to know what you class as 'older women', though.)

Irate, yes, because there are always posters on this topic who engage using disingenuity and I find it cowardly. And I don't let ageism go un-called out if I see it.

Defensive no, as this issue does not directly relate to me at present, though it definitely has in the past.

I don't see any point in denial: some parents today are lazy and entitled, just like some parents always have been. And some children have always been little shits. Not the majority, but some.

Hope this post was a little easier to digest. You have a nice day too.

Slags off wall of text

Replies with wall of text

😂

So you assume I don't have an attention span, I'm disingenuous, cowardly, ageist and in denial? So odd how you have gleaned all that from two posts. You know, its ok that we disagree, there is no need to completely overeact. Oh and FYI ageism is discriminating against someone because of there age. Pointing out that many of the peope commenting, how children are awful now, are older women isnt discriminatory, its just a fact. You seem insecure about your age, really no need to be, we are all getting older.

Not remotely insecure about my age, thank you very much! 😂

For clarity, the disingenuity/cowardice comments were about the sort of denial lots of posters engage in on this type of thread, not about you personally, but yes you do sound ageist (you have no idea of anyone's age on this thread, you are just assuming), and if you're going to sneer at people for posting 'walls of text' you can't be surprised if people draw conclusions about your attention span.

Don't post it if you can't own it, or at least don't then complain about being called out on stuff. Byeee now, have a nice day.

You're incredibly rude - no wonder you're defensive, I'd bet your children are noisy and disruptive.
But that's okay, you can blame their pre-frontal cortex.

Byeeeee👋

Read up on child development before commenting you absolutel fool🤣

Are you saying no-one can be expected to behave until their pre-frontal cortex has finished developing when they're in their 20s?

Perhaps you'd better tell the government to read up on child development - they're the ones proposing to lower the voting age to 16.

And yes you are rude.

Was going to rant about the infantilisation of young adults, but can't be bothered.

Whilst you can’t expect people to be quiet in their homes because you choose to work in yours, my god, there is something quite epic about the screaming that kids do lately, so I am actually with you.

I have to roll my eyes at the comments to just go in the office again just because some people can't have their kids behave in an appropriate manner. Some of us don't actually have offices to go to. But regardless of WFH do people not actually care about noise disturbance or have any consideration for their neighbours?

I'm not the one who has misunderstood a study that was poorly reported in the mainstream media. You clown 😂

My dad was married with two children and managing a mine at 25. Good thing he didn't realise he was still a child with a developing brain I guess.