AIBU to struggle with neighbours' children screaming while working from home?

[fld]

One of the few things I am not looking forward to the next few days are screaming kids.

Two families that moved late last year and earlier this year have 5-6 kids between them and all they do is scream! They run outside and scream. As the properties are in an odd shaped quadrangle, their screams bounce off the walls. Making the screaming even more intense. The kids’ ages, c3-9 years old.

My job is hybrid, so didn’t get this issue last summer as properties the kids live in - one didn’t have kids and the other had kids and behaved.

I had to close a window to keep the screaming down. There is no way I would close a window when it’s 31c.

I do wish parents would tell their kids that screaming is not acceptable. My work is two thirds on calls ti various customers, other staff in other departments and my team’s colleagues. I can hear the screaming from wearing the call headset.

Any tips will be appreciated

If you mean the deleted posts, did you see what some of them actually said?

Get a better headset.

i have this one from work and the noise cancelling is excellent. I don’t have to contend with screaming but my dog barks like a maniac when anyone approaches our garden and I barely hear it when wearing these (and neither do my colleagues on the other end of the line)

www.amazon.co.uk/POLY-Voyager-Wireless-Headset-Microphone/dp/B0DV9WBJZ7/ref=pd_aw_subss_hxwPER_sspa_mw_detail_m_sccl_2_1/522-1873223-4352745?pd_rd_r=221bc49e-fa64-41c5-99ac-7976a8988e8d&pd_rd_wg=dYhNm&pd_rd_w=Xtdr6&pd_rd_i=B0DV9WBJZ7&psc=1

I was genuinely taught not to scream when I was young, be ausr that was for emergencies or genuinely danger and it would be crying wolf.

I don’t think you can WFH and then complain that the conditions are like that of an office!
I was in a cafe last week, one which is big, busy and always has lots of people on laptops.
One guy was ‘on a call’ on his laptop when a grp of about 6/7 mums and babies/toddlers came in.
The looks he was shooting them! He even told his colleagues that it was really ‘bloody noisy’ in here and complained because 1 kid was wailing and another babbling really loudly…

My view is - if you want calm office like conditions, go and find a calm office to work in! Not whine at completely normal background noise in a public area or the noise of kids playing in their own gardens

‘It's not my fault that the families moved in the past 6-8 months don't discipline their kids.’

reading your posts I’ve lost all sympathy, and suspect that the kids probably aren’t that bad… still - from a practical POV they aren’t going anywhere so you’ll need to work on sound proofing where you work instead. I’d suggest getting acoustic sound proofing foam panels and creating a space where you can take calls from.
A friend did this at home as they had to record a lot, so essentially created a recording ‘booth’ at home.

Are the kids really screaming or just being loud kids playing in their own home and having fun? Just because you chose to work from home doesnt mean you are entitled to silence from neighbours. Go into the office or find one of the many office spaces set up around the community to work.

You just know the people that say it's kids being kids allow bad behaviour in cinemas and restaurants too.

This is a you and your employer problem, it's not your neighbours problem.

This phrase 'entitled to silence' keeps coming up and I don't see anyone, anywhere claiming they're entitled to silence.

What people are asking is that people stop being so selfish and antisocial and consider the noise they are making when other people are effected by that noise.

If no-one is 'entitled to silence' no-one is 'entitled' to make as much noise as they want simply because they don't give a F about anyone else and think it's their right to do whatever they want and anyone that objects is being 'entitled'.

And if you'd taken the time to read the OP you'd know why your irrelevant suggestions in your last sentence are irrelevant.

It is a residential area. So priority goes to people doing ordinary residential area things, like kids playing in the garden. It isn’t their fault that your employer is a cheapskate.

I will be going through this thread and report anyone who has not read my posts. You have no idea how giving ideas to people when you don’t read the facts is.

1. You think MN cares?

2. That statement (along with the thread topic) is a huge red flag.
   Child noise, in the daytime, is to be expected. The council would laugh at you for trying to report it.

I do have sympathy with the noise issue. I would hate it. But your attitude and expectations are completely unrealistic.

If you are using the modern definition of 'screaming' - what we used to call 'shouting' or 'yelling' I'm afraid you will have to learn to put up with it. I WFH too (no office to go into so no choice) so I know how hard it can be to concentrate but your neighbours shouldn't have to change their habits because you WFH.

If you mean actual 'screaming' though, I agree it's unacceptable. I judge parents who ignore it and never allowed DS or his friends to scream. I would tell them to stop or they had to come indoors. It's annoying and quite uncomfortable to have to listen to.

FWIW though, when it's that hot outside you would be better off keeping your windows and curtains closed, or you're just letting warm air in. We also put foil blankets over the windows to reflect the heat out. It's worth looking like a family of tinfoilhatters to keep the house cool.

No you shouldn't have to put up with this level of intrusive behaviour from others when you are in your own home.
Could you approach the family about the noise? Sadly they may have no idea how much their children's screaming affects others.
I would keep notes and report to the council.

I also work hybrid, and I have children. Last week I had the next door neighbour using power tools in his garden, the week before that ambulances as a neighbour was taken seriously ill, there is a park nearby that can be noisy. I don't allow my children to scream but they are loud and to be honest the shouts of glee in the sunshine is possibly construed as screaming by those without children. Fortunately I live in a tolerant street and my neighbours know that we do monitor the children's behaviour.

I don't expect my neighbours not to garden or create any noise during working hours because the houses are designed as a residential street, not offices. I have noise cancelling head set that works very effectively for both listening and speaking.

Get noise cancelling headset, close windows, get some sort of fan and if an opportunity arises maybe ask the families to try and keep noise a little quieter.

To be honest with the weather decent just now 3-5pm is prime playing outside time. I would rather kids were outside playing and being normal lively kids than stuck in being quiet on screens. We don't have enough nice days so need to take most advantage when we do.

Where did OP say she would report it to the council?

What's unrealistic about expecting children to not be screaming?

Aren’t they in school ?
if you’re working outside school hours then go into your office? Peace. And air con.
is sounds like you live in a housing estate -so residential noise is to be expected. eg noise of children
its not an office block

Read the Ops posts.

Op, your options are put up with it or get noise cancelling headphones. Keep your window closed and get a small aircon unit or fan? You aren't willing to talk to your neighbours and even if they did curb the noise, realistically the kids are never going to play quietly. In this heat they will be in paddling pools or using water pistols etc so the noise will be worse than if they were just playing football etc.

To the poster saying that girls should be taught not to cry wolf, I have no words 🙄

Me too. It's plain common sense and it bemuses/worries me that so many people don't seem to see it.

I suspect from your latest reply, you are exaggerating the issue. How many kids are actually home from school BY 3pm - every school around here doesn’t finish until 3:30pm at the earliest! So that would make it more likely 4pm they get outside. Are they actually screaming, or are they loud? If actually screaming as if their lives are in danger, is it really constant for hours? There are loads of kids around here. I can only think of one occasion where I heard a girl screaming - it’s so rare I immediately ran outside to check she was ok!

If it’s as you are saying it is, and the timings really are 3-5pm, I think these are your options:

1. on your wfh days, ask if you can work 7-3pm, or 8-4pm if that’s too early
2. ask your boss if you can be granted a permanent desk in your office either for the summer or permanently
3. ask for some really good noise cancelling headphones
4. plan your workday so that calls are before the kids are home

It wouldn’t matter if you were WFH for 30 years before they moved in - it’s a residential area and families are allowed to behave in the way families do. Work life doesn’t get to dictate other people’s home lives.

Before it gets presumed I’m a parent that just lets their kids get away with shit - I have 3 sons. They were never allowed outside before 9am, and weren’t allowed to play out in the garden past 7pm on school night. If they got loud, it didn’t matter if they’d only just gone outside, they were sent back inside until they could play without yelling etc.

Ah no, I think i have misunderstood. I was going off the OPs very negative replies that are visible.

It’s only happening for two hours. You absolutely could shut your windows for this time. The heat has been getting worse in the afternoons particularly this last week, it makes no sense to have your windows open early afternoon anyway you’re just letting the heat in.

Screaming does seem to be acceptable now. All kids play but when I was wee if I screamed I would be given short shrift by my parents. Screaming is different to playing. Parents see their off spring as little princes and princesses now and can’t be arsed to tell them to stop. Them being outside is a bonus for them, it allows them to scroll on their phone without parenting the child.

Society year on year gets more entitled, got to blame the parents.

Presume you have the option of going into your office to work? Bloody hell try night shift working and sleeping during summer with people gardening, kids playing out and generally more outdoor noise! But that’s life, better that than shit weather and everyone stuck indoors and miserable.
Little girls seem to like to scream when playing, mine did and she got told to stop it and she did, for all of 2 mins!

When presumably you told her again? And again, as necessary? Not all parents can be bothered, though, sadly.

Literally no one has said they want kids indoors in sunny weather and no one is saying they shouldn't play, have fun and even make noise. It's specifically the screaming people are objecting to.