Not all men, but always men

[Amodernhistory]

Driving home from work tonight to the main news stories on the radio being 1) man tortures adopted baby to death and 2) man arrested after child ends up in crocodile enclosure at zoo.

I am absolutely sick of the daily onslaught of problematic men, monsters, committing outrages. That’s all, no suggestions, just AIBU to be sickened by this constant stream of beasts who live amongst us (Gisele Pelicot’s husband, recent terrorist attacks, daily murders of women by men) combined with personal experiences of men who ‘you wouldn’t have thought it to look at him’ turning out to be sex pests and paedophiles is putting me right off them as a sex class. Not your man, not your son, not my (lovely) Dad, but all the other men… how do we know which ones?

Its hard not to conclude it’s a man problem.

Cheese and pickle please. Easy on the pickle.

Don’t worry handmaiden, I’m on it.

It is the same behaviour causing the issues though, the triggers are essentially the same even if the outside events change.

This is why the ‘News at 10’ needs to be renamed to the ‘News of Men’ because let’s face it, with the very odd reprieve, it’s always … men

If you'd been born a man would you be any different?

You know am not a man, right? Cool.

Really? A "fair few"? What... versus the giganteum number of men committing these crimes. Look at the news every single day. Open your local newspaper every week. You will be guaranteed to find something about a man committing some violent or sexual crime. Now count the times you find the same mention of a woman doing similar....and you think that's somehow comparable. 🙄

Bring back the death penalty

This post nails it.

The OP posts about how men are such a problem in our society, our country, our world, and within a few seconds the NAMALTs are out with the 'wot about da wimminz? THEY are bad sometimes too' crap that always ends up getting posted on threads like this! It would be funny if it wasn't so infuriating and bloody predictable!

.

It really isn’t.

If you’re born into a culture then that culture often teaches you your moral compass. Whilst testosterone may be a crucial factor, the way you’re raised and expected to conduct yourself around females based on your parents AND society AND possible religion will play a key part even if sometimes your nature overrides it. It’d be the exception not a normal pattern of behaviour based on your culture.

Society will shape you even if it’s subconsciously. It’s why there’s such a push now by the West to tackle the manosphere uprising. But in some countries what these men are saying is deemed perfectly acceptable and encouraged. That’s the difference.

Same goes for females. If you live in a country where it’s acceptable for you to be sold as a child, raped by your new ‘husband’, no access to education etc then irrespective of your nature, the culture you’re growing up in will inevitably shape your destiny as you don’t know any different nor are any of those around you saying it’s wrong. You may have been meant for more, but the country and culture you’re in will suppress you. You’re even aborted purely based on your sex in some countries (hence China banning gender scans).

I will stand by though that as a woman, I don’t want to import more men into the population. That gives us more resource to work on the men we already have here and gives us more prison space to put the scum away who commit VAWG. I don’t care if that upsets you, I’d swap all of them for the women they’ve left behind in shit conditions.

I work in retail and it’s always men that come in and start intimidating the female cashiers when they can’t get thier own way. It never happens when the males are on the till, it’s happened 3 times in the last 2 weeks. They come in and start shouting and intimidating some of my female staff. To the point 2 of them have come out the back crying, I’m talking women that have been through many hardships. It’s increased 10fold the last few years. Luckily I have no emotion and usually just laugh at them, I’ve told the women if that happens again to get me because I don’t care and will shut that shit down immediately. Always the men… I don’t like to tar all of them with the same brush because not all men are like that but there’s defo been an increase of misogynistic behaviour from my point of view anyway.

But it's never mothers on their own. It's Mummy and her new boyfriend. The dads are long gone by then, so not a threat anymore.

But do you really think creating a thread like this is really going to help matters. Instead of venting on here and whipping up a storm
And just think of this, does anyone on here really know who's on here, how do you know that someone might be reading this thread, get wound up, then do something stupid, might sound extreme, but you just never know

Yes hush up women! Stop being publicly outraged and fed up of men! If you MUST complain do it out of public view so you don’t hurt some man’s feelings and make them do something bad. Because if we all stay silent men will be totally fine and stop murdering us. It’s our own fault for winding them up by being angry about it.

@MrFlintstone Men like you are every bit a part of the problem. Instead of lecturing women about being silent so they don’t hurt feelings, how about go tell your brethren to stop killing women. Failing that, go boil your head.

Yep. Sexual assault, rape, domestic abuse, child abuse, murder, robbery, wars, terrorism, harassment, stalking, perving, the list goes on and on and on....

And the vast VAST majority of the time............

IT'S MEN!

There are more than 70 men serving whole life sentences in the UK. Only 4 whole life sentences have ever been given to women, 1 is now dead and 1 is probably the most controversial and unsafe conviction in modern times.

So it is not still always men

FFS! 🙄

Violent crimes are mostly men, yes. And there seems to be a lot of it about, which can lead to some very ill-feelings about men. I get it.

But perhaps it helps to reflect that violent crime is actually rare. These dreadful things that happen, like things the OP has mentioned, are not typical of your average community. They are reported on because they are rare. When you read about them, it seems that such incidences are everywhere, but they're really not. While these crimes are mostly committed by men, the vast, VAST majority of men wouldn't dream of doing such things.

It's just important to remember that if you focus on the news, you will be fed a diet of horrific things, and it will seem that they are more prevalent than they really are.

Out of a world population of seven billion, the annual global number of murders isn't even half a million. It's about 460,000. Murder is rare.

https://www.unodc.org/unodc/en/data-and-analysis/global-study-on-homicide.html

To put it another way, if you were asked if you thought murders or suicides were more common, you'd probably answer murders, since the news makes us think there's a murderer round every corner. But in fact, there are almost double the number of suicides per year globally than there are murders. The number of suicides is about 760,000.

https://www.healthdata.org/news-events/newsroom/news-releases/about-740000-global-deaths-suicide-occur-annually-thats-one

I know this doesn't take into account violent crime where someone doesn't die. I just think it's important to maintain perspective and to realise that the news makes it seems as if these things are common, when they're not.

The quote i was replying to stated "a fair few women" 3 compared to 70+ so less than 4% are women, I wouldn't exactly call that "a fair few".

Totally agree! Men are always vile to any female in retail. They would never speak to any male the same way. I see it day in, day out. Like you, I take no nonsense. Had some man in his 60's shouting at me today. For something that was of no concern to him. He was absolutely lovely to me until his wife wandered off around the store. Then he was awful. I ignored him. Just literally told him to be quiet and walked off. I bet his wife thinks he's lovely. The reality is very different. She'd be a NAMALT or a NMN for sure. When he's like that in both camps.

When you control for which sex spends more time in the presence of children, the number of men who abuse children is significantly higher than women doing likewise.

Bear in mind that you were probably being manipulated. Remember when Kate Middleton hadn't been seen for a while, even though she had made it clear that she wouldn't be around for a few months because of surgery? There was a massive wave of indignation about her, all from social media. But later, the BBC and other reputable media found that much of the social media furore was whipped up by paid Russian trolls. I know it sounds like something from a Bond film, but hostile states like Russia ARE employing people to sow discord in countries like ours via comment sections and other forms of social media. They want to tear our society apart. I highly doubt the majority of British men think any such thing. The fact that it was lots and lots of men just goes to show it was probably paid trolls. I see some of this online and I always reply with "Say hi to Putin, Russian troll" and they never answer. They would if they were genuine.

I really think a lot of people would feel much better if they limited their exposure to all this. Yes, I'm aware that its ironic I'm saying this online.

Not really the time or the fucking place for this sort of response, is it?

There aren’t a fair few women. Proportionally the number is tiny. I expect you could reel a dozen names off the top of your head. That’s because it’s so rare that when it does happen and it’s not connected to serious mental illness, it makes the news. With men, it’s so common that only the worst cases make it onto the news. In March this year, Jess Phillips read out 111 names of women killed by men in the previous 12 months. How many of those victims can you name? How many of their killers?

If women and girls killed, raped and attacked men and boys at half the rate they do to us, we’d be under lockdown, curfew, wearing ankle monitors and surrendering our DNA. Men are receiving little more than a telling off for having horrific images of children being abused. They’re being praised because they didn’t gang rape any other girls between being arrested and appearing in court. They’re getting away with murder because they’re able to claim that the woman drove him to kill her, so they should receive the lesser sentence of Manslaughter. And you want to argue that women do it too? Absolute fucking shame on you.

Wow, just wow.

Once you learn to read, you will read that I agree with some (not all) of what has been written. I am also trying to encourage people to stand up together to try and get something done.

And DV is still prevelant in the UK and mainly by men. To say “yeah but it’s worse in some other countries” is the weakest of weak “whataboutery” arguments.