Husband coming home pissed from pub

[Walesss7]

He’s been watching football down the road, is absolutely bladdered and has fallen into bed and sharted right next to me.

Luckily still clothed but I’ve sent him downstairs. What is wrong with these men? I am dreading the rest of the tournament, it’s a bloody Wednesday night and he has work tomorrow!

So many MNers have partners who shit the bed!
I’ve heard of it in RL.

This wouldn’t be LTB territory as although I’ve never shit myself, I have vomited from drinking too much.

I am quite sensible when it comes to drinking but a couple of times I’ve been absolutely fine 1 minute and then suddenly get really poorly.

If this isn’t normal behaviour then his behaviour afterwards would be much more important to me - is he very apologetic, brought new bedding and changed it himself etc

Yes men are the problem.

But statistically it is seen more in white, British men living in the UK than in any other demographic or country.

However, this may be due to other countries not reporting it as much etc

It’s not anti-English to repeat statistics.
I am English myself.

It's sugary and acidic & alongside the alcohol wreaks havoc with your bowels.
I had an ex who drank a lot of cider.
It gave him chronic heartburn & explosive bowels every morning.

I think most people have overindulged on occasion. If it’s every match, I’d be really pissed off!! I don’t care if DH gets tipsy, but not to the extent he can’t function properly the next day.

Shitting himself though??! That would be major ick forevermore. He’s revolting OP!! 🤢

“Best Armani boxers” eewwww I always binned my DCs’ pants when they had a big accident (lumps of poo, not just skid marks) during potty training.

I can’t believe a grown man wants to wash and then reuse pants that were full of his excrement!!

He is feeling very sorry for himself this morning. I think he’s most embarrassed that it was me who had to check after he refused when led next to me. He’s managed to salvage his boxers at least 🙄

This must give you the biggest ick

Was checking in for an update to see if you’d burnt the bed, bedding and his clothing and has packed his bags
wasn’t thinking you’d done an uber delivery for vanish!

why do people have such low standards @Walesss7

Since when was this thread about violence??

You think someone else did it?

A poster before me had said her ex was part of a group who would get bladdered when the football was on and their drunken behaviour could include DV. I’m guessing that is why he is an ex.

So I was just stating that DV increases during competitions like the World Cup.

Surely it’s part of the behaviour that some men think watching football means that they must get drunk, there is no possibility of them watching at home with family or not actually getting drunk when out with mates, and their awful behaviour after such events is just a natural extension of the drinking.

There are already a couple of other threads about men’s drunken behaviour after the football, and in many circles, including many women on MN it is seen as acceptable as it is ‘football’ (obviously not DV, but misogynistic behaviour/comments, toileting in places other than toilets etc all excusable due to their need to get drunk with mates whilst watching the football)

Did you pick him up under the arms and sniff him?

Is he off drink for life now?

wtf, who needs this level of detail ? You will be asking for pictures next.

Some very odd people about !!

Yes that was me - luckily I didn’t get the DV - just the pissed up thing - not why he’s an ex totally, but the childish attitude to boozing to extremes was in the mix - but plenty of women I knew from my hometown did get DV on top of the boozing to some degree , especially if England or Nottingham Forest or whoever ‘lost ‘

😂

No… it was a genuine question.. did it go on the bed?!?!

I don’t think it’s odd. I was wondering too. Did he just do it in his pants or what?! I don’t get it 😂

Have you heard the expression "never trust a fart"? Let's just say this was a very untrustworthy fart. I had to Google the word shart. "Shart” is a slang term for accidentally pooping when you fart.

I am kind of afraid of what the OP's answer will be. Ewww!

It really question if was he that pissed he lost control of his bowels

or he genuinely got caught out by thinking it was a fart and slightly followed through completely unrelated to being pissed

Sharted? Jesus wept, I have never been that drunk in my life!! I am just thinking for me this would be a deal breaker .. seriously! My DH doesn't even fart in front of me....

To complete his embarrassment, show him this thread.
That might concentrate his mind the next time he feels like knocking back 6 pints of the strong stuff.

Exactly. I’m sorry, but it does happen. It’s happened to my husband when he wasn’t pissed. It’s called being a human being. It isn’t pleasant no, but it happens unfortunately