A man unlocked a changing room door whilst I was inside. Health club

[GymClassZero]

I went to my gym and used the disabled changing and shower room (it also has a toilet). I have mobility issues and need the aids provided here. The room is between the male and female changing rooms and can be accessed from both sides, so both doors need to be locked from inside.

I locked both doors and was getting ready to shower. While I was inside, I heard men talking on the other side of the door. One tried the handle, it was locked. He said to his friend he wanted to use the room. Another man said ‘there might already be someone in there because the door is locked’. The first man then said words to the effect of, ‘Nah, fuck the women, it’s been left locked. I’m going in there’.

Seconds later, I watched the lock unwind as it was being manipulated from the outside. He opened the door while I was inside in my swimwear. He was surprised to see me in there. I shouted at him to get out, got dressed and reported it immediately.

The gym has investigated. They’ve accepted the member accessed the disabled changing room inappropriately but they are not banning him. They say he has been spoken to and warned not to use that facility again.

They’ve also said they are replacing the locks to something more up to date than the current basic lock, and reviewing the signage on the doors.

I’m glad they’re changing the locks, but I’m angry that this is being partly framed around confusion, signage and lock issues

He was warned someone might be inside. The door was locked.

He could have knocked and waited. Instead, he chose to interfere with a locked private changing room door and enter.

I’m left feeling pretty upset and a bit traumatised by the whole incident. I really don’t want to bump into him again in the gym As he’s quite intimidating. I’ve seen him in the gym, he’s quite loud and has a certain vibe about him.

I also found out there have been previous issues with this changing room setup, which makes me even more concerned.

AIBU to expect stronger action from the gym, and to feel that a warning is not enough in these circumstances?

ideally I’d like to see him banned as it was an accident.

(The gym have confirmed he is not disabled and should not be using the disabled facilities).

He simply didn't care if anyone was in there. His only priority was getting into a space he wasn't entitled to use with disregard for any current person using it. You're very silly to repeatedly misrepresent what I said.

Really no not that I can think of. The indicators are sometimes off so Ive tried the door, or cafes etc often don't have indicators - but if you've tried the door that's it. You wait and look apologetic when they come out. The 'I'm in here' is for when there isn't a lock (like at a friend's house).

The gym apparently has already disclosed to the OP, that he is indeed not disabled, which is a total lack of customer privacy.

Where's your evidence he didn't care given he was then surprised to find someone in there? Why was he surprised? And said he thought it was empty and left locked on one side?
How do you know he isn't entitled to use it given the gym doesn't need to know his disabilities and if they did wouldn't disclose it to OP anyway?

Why would they know that though? I haven't ever been asked to disclose to my gym if I have a health condition that allows me to use the disabled facility?

You don't apologise when you try the door and it's locked then? How bizarre.

That is a question for the OP, who stated that in her first post. I am wondering the same thing though. Even if there is a slight possibility that they asked him, they should never have told the OP, if he was disabled, or not.

Its a hopeless arrangement. However, the man did not know you were in there. So get annoyed at the gym not at the man though he doesn't sound a very pleasant character

You have a mouth and surely upon hearing the guy say he was going to get in you should have just shouted “someone is in here”… But the gym has acted responsibly and at least you weren’t naked.

‘especially when someone listening to the whole convo of the opposing opinions of the men doesn't say anything or give any sound of someone using the room’

i was using the room. What noises should I have made? Getting undressed is not a noisy activity.

whilst they were talking, initially there was absolutely no indication he would open the door. It didn’t cross my mind that he would open the door. When he did, it was seconds after he tried the handle. I had a few seconds to react. I grabbed a towel and he open the door.

I have a brain injury which has led to mobility issues and speech delay. It takes me a few seconds to get the words out. That’s all it took for him to open the locked door with no warning.

I didn’t know there was an issue with the doors being left locked. That’s the benefit of hindsight !!

‘We also don't know he has no entitlement to use the room’

the gym have confirmed he had no reason to use the disabled facility. He made a statement confirming this.

He wasn't entitled to use the bathroom anyway

How can you know that? How can anyone know that?
I occasionally have to use the disabled loo although you would wonder why on earth I had the right to do so if you saw me walking in or out.

My gym has never asked me to declare whether or not or why I sometimes need to use it. I don't know any gyms who ask that question.

This, along with not being up for a fight, probably contributed to my lack of words

If you were in any way in fear of being assaulted by the individual forcing open a locked door to gain access, regardless of the individual's intention, then an offence of common assault has been committed. The guidelines are quite clear.
The opinions of the victim blaming posters on this thread are utterly irrelevant.

op what happened when he opened the door and saw you there in a towel?

I agree he sounds like a fuckwit but dispute the 'predatory'.

There's no evidence here to suggest he's a predator. The most obvious conclusion from all that the OP has said is that he assumed incorrectly that the room was unoccupied because of the double door set up and the fact that no one called out- I'm in here.

Pushing the theory that the OP was the victim of a predator rather than a mistake- why? To what end?

He simply didn't care if anyone was in there. His only priority was getting into a space he wasn't entitled to use with disregard for any current person using it

How can that be the case? If there was someone already in there he wouldn't be able to use it anyway. He must have genuinely thought it was empty, otherwise there would be no point opening it. I doubt he would have insisted on sharing the space.

Clear your throat? Knock your arm against the door? Use your words? Only because you literally heard them talking about assuming the room was empty and left open from the other side. As others, I'm not saying you did anything wrong per se but I'm baffled as an adult you've never been in this situation in a changing room or toilet where someone has tried the door or talked about whether a cubicle is occupied. Are you Australian? It find it weird you said he said "I'm going in there" while also saying you had no indication he would open the door. No one's asking you to react super human speed with your disability but how you describe it you didn't actually try or want to react, you seem to think you didn't need to indicate you were using it despite the conversation you heard outside, watched the lock turn but suddenly once he had entered you used your words etc. It all just sounds very odd.

the gym have confirmed he had no reason to use the disabled facility. He made a statement confirming this.

This is appalling imo, the gym should not be disclosing other people's private info to you whether or not he disclosed it to them and I'd be worried the gym were.actually asking people this?

Because the gym confirmed that they had asked him if he had a reason to need to use the disabled facility. And he said no.

Don't be so silly. Common assault is based on perception in the sense of someone raising their fist at you whether they intended to follow through and punch you. No one's going to be arrested or charged for opening a room they reasonably thought was empty and erroneously left locked on one side. That's like saying I can report common assault everytime someone makes me jump..

the gym have confirmed he had no reason to use the disabled facility. He made a statement confirming this

They had no right to tell you that.

I am so sorry OP that this thread is full of awful victim blamers. Absolutely shocking.

I really think you should report this to 101.
If you were my daughter and this happened to her, it would 100% be a police matter.

The gym are a disgrace.

I am disabled! I just haven't be disclosed.my personal health conditions to the gym, I want under the impression I had to in order to use the facilities. I'd be annoyed if I was demanded to because someone was annoyed I tried a cubicle door.

I am wondering if they had a right to ask him, in the first place. The staff need some training, by the sound of it.

Not if the person in there is silent no, because that's to me an indication they don't want to converse. I know you think I'm crazy, but I've been looking online at reddit at such and it does seem the etiquette is very mixed, even within countries, but plenty of people do prefer the silent approach once the lock has done its job. Not that searching online about locked toilet doors makes me seem less crazy. Anyway in this example I don't think he should have used a coin or whatever to unlock the door but got a staff member who hopefully would have given the OP a longer time to respond.

Because the gym confirmed that they had asked him if he had a reason to need to use the disabled facility. And he said no

They had no right to pass on that information to any other customer.