A man unlocked a changing room door whilst I was inside. Health club

[GymClassZero]

I went to my gym and used the disabled changing and shower room (it also has a toilet). I have mobility issues and need the aids provided here. The room is between the male and female changing rooms and can be accessed from both sides, so both doors need to be locked from inside.

I locked both doors and was getting ready to shower. While I was inside, I heard men talking on the other side of the door. One tried the handle, it was locked. He said to his friend he wanted to use the room. Another man said ‘there might already be someone in there because the door is locked’. The first man then said words to the effect of, ‘Nah, fuck the women, it’s been left locked. I’m going in there’.

Seconds later, I watched the lock unwind as it was being manipulated from the outside. He opened the door while I was inside in my swimwear. He was surprised to see me in there. I shouted at him to get out, got dressed and reported it immediately.

The gym has investigated. They’ve accepted the member accessed the disabled changing room inappropriately but they are not banning him. They say he has been spoken to and warned not to use that facility again.

They’ve also said they are replacing the locks to something more up to date than the current basic lock, and reviewing the signage on the doors.

I’m glad they’re changing the locks, but I’m angry that this is being partly framed around confusion, signage and lock issues

He was warned someone might be inside. The door was locked.

He could have knocked and waited. Instead, he chose to interfere with a locked private changing room door and enter.

I’m left feeling pretty upset and a bit traumatised by the whole incident. I really don’t want to bump into him again in the gym As he’s quite intimidating. I’ve seen him in the gym, he’s quite loud and has a certain vibe about him.

I also found out there have been previous issues with this changing room setup, which makes me even more concerned.

AIBU to expect stronger action from the gym, and to feel that a warning is not enough in these circumstances?

ideally I’d like to see him banned as it was an accident.

(The gym have confirmed he is not disabled and should not be using the disabled facilities).

Things I don't understand - why he said 'fuck the women' (aren't disabled facilities unisex?) and why when you saw the door turn you didn't say "Occupied."

That must have been frightening. Something similar happened to me years ago when I was in a baby changing /disabled toilet, changing my baby. The first time he walked in as I hadn’t locked the door properly. Not great but he said sorry. (I had just had a pee so pulling my jeans up!) Then he waited outside and obviously didn’t like how long I was taking and tried to come in again!! I shouted I’m still fucking in here ! (My baby was 10
weeks old at this point), and a member of staff told him where the mens were. Arse!
As you could hear them, didn’t you think to shout “someone is in here”. Although I appreciate on the spot it’s not always possible to think and act.
It’s good the gym is taking measures and don’t worry about seeing him, you did nothing wrong. Hopefully there will be more complaints if he carries on with that attitude

It sounds like a disastrous arrangement. I would be mad at the gym primarily rather than the man

As you could hear them on the outside did you not think to shout to let them know you were inside?

I don’t know why he said that. I assume because he thought a woman had left the men’s door locked and exited via the women’s changing room.

it all happened in a few seconds. I didn’t have time to think clearly.

I expect often a lock is left on one of the doors for long periods of time when the room is empty and that's why people get fed up and assume it is unoccupied

I would be far more annoyed at the gym for having this risky set up than I would be annoyed at the man

I am also not sure how the gym would feel it appropriate to disclose his health status to you. It's not appropriate for them to divulge to you whether he is or is not disabled.

I am cross wit the gym too. The knew it was an issue as a similar event had already happened. It’s a major safeguarding concern as far as i‘m concerned .

Are they the sort of locks that you can turn from outside? There should be Radar locks on both doors (I assume you have a key as a genuine user of accessible toilets etc).

He shouldn’t have tried to open it whether she said anything or not. Some women would freeze in that situation! He should be banned.

(The gym have confirmed he is not disabled and should not be using the disabled facilities).

They did what???

Personally I'd get as far away as possible from this bunch of cowboys!

I think the gyms response is fair - it sounds like he thought the door had been accidently left locked (which I suspect happens fairly often) rather than he was getting in to upset you or to look at you, he's been warned not to use the room again, they're changing the locks (so presumably they can't be easily opened from the outside although they will probably have to still have some sort of over-ride for staff in case they need to gain access if someone eg falls) and are increasing signage. I'm surprised they confirmed to you he wasn't disabled, that's a breach of confidentiality.

Agree - that information should not be discussed with you.

Yes just normal locks that you can unlock by using a coin or similar.

This is what I can’t stop thinking about. What sort of person unlocks a toilet / shower / changing room door with even knocking.

It’s the only gym in my area and I need the facilities for my physio and rehab. I’m sad I have no other option.

An entitled man! God knows there are enough of them about. He probably manspreads on the bus as well. Don't overthink it - his behaviour sounds more rude than predatory (although of course he may also be a predator). But do insist on the gym installing Radar locks and better signage.

I'd have just shouted out "I am in here". So he knew it was actually occupied.

It definitely sounds like the male door has been left locked in the past and exited into the woman’s changing rooms.
I think a warning is sufficient given the gym has allowed this to happen by having inadequate locks in the first place.
I’d be vary weary of the gym disclosing someone’s disabled status. My gym would be very unlikely to know I’m disabled, I go to the gym regularly and participate in a lot of the classes etc (so not physically or visually disabled) but have a bowel condition that sometimes mean I need access to the disabled toilets or showers. I’m sure the majority of people would judge me using them.

On the one hand you said he didn't care tgat a woman was in there but on the other you say ge was surprised to see you when ge opened the door. It cant be both, so given that there's your side of the story and his side, I can see why the gym gave him the benefit of doubt so I think yabu to expect them to have banned him immediately.

How on earth could a cubicle door be left accidentally locked if it needs a coin to open it? Obviously someone is inside.

I’d say im a disabled member who requires your disabled bathroom. Since a large intimidating man deliberately unlocked the door from the outside and walked in on me, I’m unable to use your gym until you change the lock mechanism. This is a formal request for a refund of my membership for the period your gym facilities are not safe for disabled people. Please can you advise how to process the refund and by when you will have the locks updated.

Easily. It’s an odd arrangement- two doors. You can leave through one, forgetting to open the one you aren’t using. This arrangement was at our local hospital pool, but supervised by volunteers so it was safe and efficient.

I don’t understand why, when he first tried the door, you didn’t just say, “it’s occupied”

He shouldn’t have opened it of course, especially if he did not need to use an accessible changing space.

With not saying anything, it is easy to assume someone forgot to unlock a door when leaving by the other.