Was this neighbour "entitled to say what he wants in his own garden?"

[MrCollinsandhisboiledpotatoes]

My friend shared a funny story this morning.

Her garden ends in a six foot fence, which backs onto another garden for the house behind her. They are large, very long gardens.

The man of this house, clearly thinking he had found a secluded spot away from his kids, was having a VERY explicit conversation with his wife on the phone, at the end of his garden, right against the fence. He was describing in great detail exactly what he was going to do to her when she returned home from her trip.

Trouble is, friend and her kids were sat right on the other side of the fence. They have a decking area there with chairs, tables, kids toys etc.

She couldn't let this conversation go on in earshot of her kids (3yo and 5yo) so she cheerfully shouted over the fence "very happy for your wife mate, but my kids are two feet away from you!" To which she heard a fumbled "shit, hold on" and then silence.

She reiterated this story to us, we all laughed, and agreed she did the right thing.

Retold story to husband just now who laughed, but said really, she had no right to tell him anything and embarrass him. It's his garden, he can have that conversation if he wants, and she should have moved the kids away until it stopped.

I disagree and think if you're going to live around other people you need to think of other people.

Who's right?
Reasonable - me and my friends
unreasonable - my DH

Guess you’d have to check with the police for that one.

I mean you can’t wank in your window that’s established as wrong rightly so. But would having a wank to some porn on your phone in your garden be a problem… 🤔

I mean I don’t see why you couldn’t toss one off it’s your garden but then again I also wouldn’t want to see it but unless your wanking at me is it just a me problem rather than a legal one. I’m not googling it 🤣🤣

Your husband thinks this man has the right to say what he likes in his garden but your friend shouldn't say what she wants in hers? Is he usually such a massive mysoginist?

Don’t be daft. The neighbour wasn’t talking to her, he was unaware of her presence.

And can we have a diagram?
(Plus one of the garden layout) 😉

Your friend was doing the neighbour a favour, given that he didn't want to be overheard. If she'd kept quiet, chances are he would have started on some really embarrassing stuff, only to be interrupted by her children asking loudly "Mummy, what's a blow job?".

I'm on the fence 😀

Is anyone else really really impressed with that man's marriage and also a bit jealous?

Yeah as much as no one will buy you don’t hear two young kids on the other side of the fence, I do love ghe fact that mumsnet is so utterly obsessed with cheating someone actually posted do uou think he came to the bottom of the garden as his wife was in the house and so she couldn’t hear , 😂

A garden isn’t a soundproof booth. If you’re standing right against a shared fence, you’re effectively in someone else’s ear. But he wasn’t being malicious, just careless and a bit thick. And the fact he immediately stopped tells you he knew it.

But legally you can do what you like in your garden, as long as you’re not forcing others to be part of it ,and you weren't forced as you had the choice to walk away.

Just bad timing and you handled it wonderfully!

😂

I don’t think you should tell someone what they can do or say in their own garden. I think I would have just shouted over to one of my kids their sandcastle looks great, so he would hear me and then hopefully realise he can be heard and stop.

Retold story to husband just now who laughed, but said really, she had no right to tell him anything and embarrass him. It's his garden, he can have that conversation if he wants, and she should have moved the kids away until it stopped

I don’t think I like the cut of your DH’s jib. The man obviously didn’t want his own kids to hear it and his quite reasonable response suggests he didn’t want your friend or her kids to hear it either. What difference would it have made if your friend had called out, tactfully coughed or engaged in a ten minute battle with her children about why they had to instantly drop the thing they were very much enjoying doing, and go inside. He’s going to have been embarrassed no matter what she did. Your DH sounds quite entitled. No right? I sincerely hope you remind him of that the next time any of your neighbours do anything he disapproves of.

You’ve misunderstood what @MrTiddlesTheCat is saying.

How did she keep the 3 and 5 year olds so silent he had no idea anyone was on the other side? I want to know her secret! My DC would be chatting.

But she wasn't complaining?

I googled it for you, so you don't have to, yw 😀

I love that someone has asked Reddit 😆 "I really fancy a wank in the garden, I wonder what Reddit thinks of this?" 🤣

Apparently they were quietly concentrating on building sandcastles. I don't think the interaction lasted very long, I think people are imagining a much longer conversation. I will ask her for further details if you like! But btw, this all happened a week ago, I just heard the story today. She may have forgotten the finer deets.

You are right.

he hid at the end of his garden away from his kids ears.

Why should friends move their kids away from his ears.

He clearly also thought the friend was right due to his reaction.

But 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 - poor bloke

Got to love Reddit. So as long as you are not seen you can wank as much as you fancy in your garden.

So build a den, a shed or erect a tent 😉 or hide in your own bushes 🤣

Mush easier to get away with as a women than a man though anyway. No officer I just had a very very bad itch. 😇 maybe the start of thrush I’ll go to the chemist 😩 😂😂

No, I haven’t.

You make your presence with children known and you distract them. If you are alone, you listen very quietly. 👂

Ego bruise by bro osmosis

Yes, he should, but his rights to say what he likes in his garden will (legally) will always be given more legal protection than offended neighbours.

I burst out laughing reading this and DH thinks I've gone mad

Ok, I can’t be bothered to argue with you.