What is the wankiest thing you’ve seen your ex do?

[Magpiesinthegarden]

That made you think - what a knob! And that you are well rid of them!

lighthearted thread -

I’ll go first -

Recently my ex changed his profile picture to this wanky AI generated image of him in the middle with a halo and two angels either side… he actually gave himself a halo 🤣 What a knobhead! Like he was Jesus 😳(He was a massive narcissist. My ex. Not Jesus)

What are the wankiest things your ex has ever done?

No way! Like, bunny hops? Not just stamping his foot? They were REALLY loud thuds. I literally thought someone was on the roof. (To be fair, he described them as bunny hops. I didn't actually see it!)

Tbh I dont remember his reaction, I just remember mine lol ... he was a violent man when he used to drink, and he wud get so drunk that he would wet the bed too ... he had so many other wankiest things i could write a book lol.

After we divorced he ditched our 2 kids and didnt bother seeing them, so we moved away after 2 years, an I was the bad one for taking them away from him! Not seen him since thank fuck!

Heard hes married again now to an old friend of mine lol ... I hope she stocked up on extra underware and plastic sheets for her bed lol ..

My first visit to his flat, I noticed lengths of dental floss hanging from a shelf. Knowing he was into DIY and creative things, I asked what they were for. “Flossing my teeth,” he said. Yes: used, dried out, reused, dried out again. Ugh.

A weirdo who has also shared a couple of his own stories that he’s clearly still hung up on, while making snide comments about those doing the same!

I guess they must be very recent, as time heals, apparently!

Was the 'love of my life' (ha) and pretty much out of the blue told me he wants to break up. I was absolutely devastated, obviously. He, instead of offering at least a few platitudes, started telling me how much more upset he was when the girlfriend before me broke up with him. Because everything had to be about him. Wanker.

Ex stole DS's first edition Harry Potter books and a robot toy. They were pretty much the only things we had of any financial value, and DS was planning to sell them. DS is no contact with his Dad now.

Love it 😀

Abruptly left me and the kids to shack up with a woman literally half his age, all the time insisting they were ' just friends'. He'd known her about three weeks.

She had a broken foot at the time, and was using a wheelchair. He wheeled her round to my house about a week later for his first contact visit with the kids. Had the absolute brass bollocks to ask if I could give her some of the Tramadol I'd been prescribed for chronic pain as she was in such agony. Got shouty when I said no.

Yes. Well he did both, to be fair. I could write a book. Just about him. And another one about all the others who have unfortunately darkened my towels at any given time.

One woman left me because she didn't want to commit to me, as it would mean leaving her football team. There were football teams near me of course, that she could've joined. But she wanted to stay with her own team. I mean, fair enough? But she strung me along for several years with excuses of why she couldn't move in with me just yet, keeping me dangling. I was fed up of long distance.

Eventually she admitted it. I wouldn't mind, but I had never known a team as rubbish as them. The last match I was dragged to went to, they were beaten 20-1. I thought I was watching the rugby going by the scores. Had she been down to play for Manchester United or something I may have understood. She's too old to play now and has been single ever since I finally decided enough was enough. I had actually relented to moving to her end of the woods and had put an offer in on a house! When she admitted that the main reason she did not want to move to me was football. I decided that whereas I am not perfect, nor am I a supermodel, that I was worth a tad bit more than being second fiddle to a shite football team.

Too many to choose but generally stuff he thinks will upset me BUT actually upsets our children.

i know how bad it is when my daughter says ‘Mum you know when dad’s being a twat……’

i have to try not too laugh!

Had a wanky tattoo with a girls name underneath. Told me it was his dead cousins name. Turns out it was his very current girlfriend’s name. 🤦🏻‍♀️

My ex used to buy a cigar from behind the bar (when that was a thing) and then sit there puffing away and going on about his “fine cigar”. It was not a fine cigar, it was a shitty one (probably Hamlet).

He was 22 or 23 at the time.

If you find the picture, you could get a bespoke kit made up?
There are so many terrible stories on here, but the cruelty in this one really stood out to me...

Oh my word is he called Charlie? Knew a guy like that (friend of a friend) when I was young and would not put this list past him. This is wild. How bloody weird on the Economist front! That’s so grim!

I have gone around the Internet so many times,looking for it

The problem is,my memory is slightly hazy-I remember the victorian girl,the postbox (how can I forget that bloody postbox?) and the buildings but im not 100% on any other details (it was in a sale bin in a shop)

Ill keep looking on the details I can remember but I do it as a hobby and have made loads more

His time will come-hes in his 50's,can only get young girls that have no self esteem and that he can bend to his demands (his personality is now illegal thanks to the new coercive control laws-i hope one stands up to him and goes to the police)

He'll die a lonely man where nobody will mourn him and he knows it

I’m so sorry; what a cruel bastard. I’m so angry for you and the cross stitch! Keep searching. I hope one comes up some day x

Thank you xxx

Might be worth joining any cross stitch and sewing groups on FB. I know a lot of hobbyists (me included!) often buy far more stuff for projects than they have a hope of doing, so you might strike lucky!

ETA is it like this? https://creativecraftingworld.co.uk/product/victorian-post-box-sampler/

Oh my gosh I so hope it is!! I’m so invested in mumsnet power finding this for you!

I used to do cross stitch so will have a look in my old box of cross stitch goodies as that pattern seems weirdly familiar. Your ex was a pure dickhead doing that to you. Mine had the temerity to berate me for breaking a dinner plate and making a mess. The whole thing was caused by him throwing the dinner plate loaded with a Sunday dinner and covered in boiling hot gravy at my head. The plate broke from hitting me in the head and I was burned with the gravy. But obviously it was all my fault 🙄 as I said at the start of the thread, at least he did the world a favour by dropping dead😂

This is comedy gold! 😂

Thank you
I really appreciate it-if you do find one,please let me know what it will cost to buy it and post it

Very,very similar
I remember it having buildings-like a victorian winter day
Lots of greys and blacks (i think!)
I like that one tho-i might hunt it down and give it a go
(not that I dont have a few packed away already!haha)

No problem, I know how good it feels when you complete a kit that you really love, and to have some cock knocking scumbag ruin it just to hurt you pisses me off on your behalf 😅 obviously I tried googling but it kept coming up with Christmas ones. Was it a light or darker colours pattern?

My older dc worked with my exh. Not his df.. He told ds to make sure I saw his new fb profile pic of him and his new gf. I'm not on fb so ds showed me.
They were wearing his /hers Smurf outfits.. I nearly wet myself laughing!!