What is the wankiest thing you’ve seen your ex do?

[Magpiesinthegarden]

That made you think - what a knob! And that you are well rid of them!

lighthearted thread -

I’ll go first -

Recently my ex changed his profile picture to this wanky AI generated image of him in the middle with a halo and two angels either side… he actually gave himself a halo 🤣 What a knobhead! Like he was Jesus 😳(He was a massive narcissist. My ex. Not Jesus)

What are the wankiest things your ex has ever done?

He seems such a fool for not listening to your warmhearted wise wisdom in the 1st instance & completely arrogant to then blame you & defer his stupidity & ignorance onto innocent sensible you 💚🙏💚

Oh ...this is a good thread! Ive a list, but this was the final nail in thine coffin!

I went over to my friends one night, had a couple girly drinks, came home .. quite unexpected (no not to find another woman - or even a man) but what i found was him dressed up in my underware, with stockings and suspenders on. He even had his socks inside my bra to give him a bust!!!!!

Ive never told the words to anyone in my life & ive been divorced for over 26 years now lol ..

About 27 years ago,he walked out leaving me with 2 small kids,a shit load of debt and no money

He would come round to my house (to check i wasnt shagging anyone else or heaven forbid,have some sort of peace from him) and would sit there smirking at me (I was so scared of him as he was violent and controlling)

Anyway,id scraped enough cash together to buy myself a cross stitch just for something to do on an evening when the kids had gone to bed

I spent the best part of 9 months stitching it-it was a victorian girl putting letter in a postbox and very detailed

I put blood,sweat,tears and my soul into making it and when the kids where about,it lived in a drawer away from small hands

I was about 20/25 stitches away from finishing it when he swaggered in,that smirk on his face and the attitude of 'im here to see my kids and you cant stop me'

He went into the kitchen to make himself a black coffee and a poke about in my cupboards/drawers

He found my cross stitch,made his coffee and poured the whole lot in the drawer deliberately

It was ruined (i tried to save it,but it was too stained) and his smirk didnt match the 'I just dropped my coffee by mistake, soz'

Daft thing now,he knows im not scared of him at all and runs away when he sees me but I never did replace that cross stitch as it was one from an end of line sale,which is how I been able to afford it-I've trawled Ebay but have never found it again in kit form

He never came into my home again-he knew he'd gone too far and that was my death by the last cut

Didn't stop him dragging me through the courts to control me until he lost interest

He knows that if I get within arms length of him,ill have him by his tiny bollocks and i'll launch him into space

Just wow!!

”He knows that if I get within arms length of him,ill have him by his tiny bollocks and i'll launch him into space”

I have done embroideries, so I know how much effort goes into something like that, @Delladuck - I am infuriated on your behalf, and I’ll help you!

Thank you

I've done loads more over the years but none as special as that victorian girl with the letterbox

It was the smirk that wound me up the most

We would have to form a queue!

On the rare occasion my ex pays any shared children’s expenses (think £20/30) he says it will have to wait until the end of the month for when he gets paid (aww, poor penniless man). He earns over £400,000.

So many brave, sad, scary and/or funny stories.
But I just want to give a special thanks to the pp who was accused of chewing the table mats 😂. I actually woke up laughing about that one this morning.

My university boyfriend was full of it about the top marks he got in his exams at the end of our first year. When we had our first lot of second year exams, he was stressing about expecting to fail (that's what happens when you have two girlfriends on the go at the same time, you stupid cock) and he let slip that actually, he'd barely scraped through those first year ones. He just made his other grades up because he wanted to be able to say that he'd done better than me.

I went to sleep giggling about that one last night! Accused of chewing table mats, like she was a bad puppy or something! 🤣🤣🤣🤣

I’ve got ptsd etc from mine unfortunately as I had ten years of abuse prior to court. I then received a death threat last year 25 years after I last saw him so I had to get the police involved. he doesn’t know where I live as I moved hundreds of miles away years ago.

Socks inside the bra to give him a bust! Jesus fucking Christ. I don't know whether to laugh or cry. What did he say???

This seems underrated. A complete knob move 😂

I think I might love your mum. That's priceless 😂

Sorry but the point has completely flown over your head. Your lack of comprehension is obvious when the point is not, to you.

You are on a thread which asked a question. People responded to that question. That is what they are doing.

HTH.

Dressing gown plastic bag guy I mentioned earlier in this thread used to 'thump' too 😆 I feel embarrassed to admit that I found that perfectly normal! Dear lord. I've since realised that tantrums are for toddlers.

I’ve had a few wanky boyfriends over the years.
One (after I had dumped him for a high number of wanky things) put on a dating app that his nickname was ‘Kewl’. He told me this because (he said) that’s what everyone called him. I had known him since we were 14. We were 24. It was not his nickname.

His name was Ben. He called his penis Little Ben. 🤢

When we were in the process of splitting up (which I had to do slowly and safely because he was a controlling shite) he moved in with one of his work friend’s sisters. He spun a whole sob story about his awful I was etc. and she needed a lodger so he moved in with her in her spare room.

I ended up getting the police involved due to his harassment / stalking and the police went to visit him.

I received a phone call from her asking me not to forward his post any more. She explained that after the police visit, she asked him to move out.

She was a nurse and had gone to work and when she came back he was gone. The absolute arsehole had taken his stuff, some of hers AND left the front door and back door wide open. The house was in a not very salubrious area of Manchester.

Mine went one better, similar situation, booked the wedding before our divorce but by the time the decree nici came through there was less than 6 weeks to the wedding and you have the wait 6 weeks before applying for decree absolute. So he told me they had decided to have a blessing ceremony instead as everything was booked, and they would quietly get married later. What actually happened came out a couple of years later when they spilt up and she went to divorce him and found out they weren't actually married. It was a proper church wedding and he faked the divorce documents, she had no idea.

🫣🫨

I had to re-read this several times. WTAF?

Was it just the one Victorian girl? I’ve found tippy toes from the all our yesterdays range by Faye Whittaker?

Forgot to add the picture

Ha. I actually misunderstood the first post in this little thread thinking they were saying something supportive. More fool me for assuming people have good intentions 🤦‍♀️. Turns out they are actually a pillock. Oh well.

Thank you,thats not the one though (I've already stitched that one-it lives in my bedroom)

It was a grey,rainy day,the little girl was more to the right and she was reaching up to the letterbox (I hated red after that!) with a load of victorian buildings behind her (I may have got a few details slightly out but it was definitely just the one girl-i remember whinging about her dress to a friend)

Im not sure if she was wearing a hat or not

(Im painting this out to be a real miserable picture!)

Im sure it was by the same lady,all our yesterday's does ring a bell (I have done a few of that range and they are lovely-i love the seaside ones)

Agree. Complete wierdo. Makes sense that some abusive wierdos would come to a well-known site like Mumsnet to be horrible to women, though.

Probably got a matchstick dick. 🤣