AIBU to wear a white print dress to my brother’s wedding & dressing my DD in white too?

[brillfrill]

I plan to wear a white dress with a nature print on it for my brother’s wedding in August. Picked it out with DM, she thinks it’s definitely fine. The thing is my toddler DD will also be wearing a white. Do you think anyone would take offence? I’ve added a picture of a similar dress on this thread because I don’t want the actual one on here if I wear it.

Wondering what you think?

The people who look at a dress with a significant multi-coloured pattern on a white background and cry "That's a white desss" are the ones being obtuse.

Just ignore. I am not in favour of wearing white to a wedding but those dresses are patently heavily patterned.

So it can’t be jersey, cotton, chiffon… what’s left? satin or silk? wool?!

I sent a picture of my intended dress to my SIL before the wedding asking if it was too much. It was white off shoulder dress with flowers all over. She loved it. But I asked first.

https://www.prettylittlething.com/product/goddiva-floral-printed-flutter-sleeve-chiffon-midi-dress_p-e870a5e7-aedb-4f65-aeab-fac9cd72b3cc

https://www.roman.co.uk/floral-print-hanky-hem-dress-14253664 (only 10 and 12 left)

https://www.roman.co.uk/bardot-floral-tiered-dress-14719838

https://www.roman.co.uk/floral-pleated-neck-midi-dress-14729372

https://www.anthropologie.com/en-gb/shop/maeve-sleeveless-ruched-babydoll-midi-dress

Also - there's currently loads of Farm Rio on Ebay for around £150, if your style and budget lean that way. They're mostly last season's Anthropolgie stock. Not linking as I've forbidden myself to look!

Like the blue & white hanky hem.

Honestly OP, just find something you feel great in and I hope you all enjoy your brother’s wedding. A white or cream background on a patterned dress is fine. (I think that roses one would fit very well with your Sister in Law’s pastel suggestion.)

Thank you!

I’m looking to spend no more than £30-£40 though. £10 for DD.

This! And by the look of the poll result, the majority of posters agree. So many other colours to wear, yet the OP picks something that is largely white. It's pretty much 80% white! (Maybe more!)

As you say, mother-in-laws and sister-in-laws often do this. There is an underlying element of trying to upstage the bride. Even if they don't realise they're doing it. The OP will very likely not admit that this is what she's doing, because she probably doesn't realise it.

@brillfrill Pick another dress! As has been said, it doesn't even look like wedding guest attire, it looks too casual!

And the dress you've got for your daughter is not suitable either. If she's not a flower girl or a bridesmaid, why on earth are you putting her in the dress that you have posted pictures of?!

.

Oh right - You can rent starting from 40 pounds

They are objectively fine but wouldn’t be my taste, I think they are also a bit dull, sorry, OP.

They're even worse than the OP's!

What’s the allowed % then?

And what do you mean this is something MILs and SILs do?! People are coming up with the craziest accusations in this thread I can’t

If you desperately want florals there are loads on Vinted for your budget without the white background, to save any concern, OP - found these in the first few options for example!

I think its unnecessary and just best avoided, people can interpret it as bitvhy and im sure thats the last thing you'd want at a family wedding. Choosing to wear white when there is so so many easy other choices just makes you look bad imo.

And some women can be really ridiculous with what they wear to someone else's wedding. 🙄 Wearing something 80% white screams 'look at meeee! I don't care if I upstage the bride! I'm just soooo random, I'm a free spirit, and I do woteva I want to...... So THERE.'

If I have to explain this to you, then I can't help you.

I actually bought my wedding dress from Shein and also dresses for weddings too, usually around £25-30 and there are some stunning ones!

You can’t explain either of those things? Then why are you saying it?

This is my next buy. I’m a size 18 but it’s just an example of types of dress they have.

GlowEve CURVE Plus Size Women Elegant Sleeveless Floral Print Dress With Bow Tie Waist
I discovered amazing products on SHEIN.com, come check them out!
api-shein.shein.com/h5/sharejump/appjump?link=RlPcwKUpYNu_8&localcountry=GB&shc=2_RlPcwKUpYNu&url_from=GM71092070296

Have you seen the two last suggestions OP posted?

They are neither random, nor free spirit, nor bride upstaging.

I especially like the roses OP. It is OBVIOUSLY not bridal, it has a strong pattern in pastels which the bride has suggested, the fabric and cut are not what you would wear everyday. There is nothing wrong with chiffon. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that dress for a wedding.

And I say this as someone who thinks not being cautious is pointless. You have avoided the pitfalls. Ignore further attacks. FWIW I think these dresses are more appropriate than the orange floral you originally posted and I suspect if you had posted them at first we would not have gone down this too informal/upstaging the bride rabbit hole.

Thank you! Honestly I only went searching for these other options after making this thread. But agree. I’m super confused about some of the comments people are making about basically me and DM doing this on purpose as if judging whether this dress is fine would be different I was a random guest?!

What on earth is going on with this thread? The OP is planning to wear a patterned dress with a white background therefore it is not a white dress!

What is the obsession with thinking every female guest is trying to upstage the bride?!! No-one seems to freak out if a male guest wears the same colour suit as the groom!!

Ah but it isn't the Groom's Big Day. Have you ever heard of the monster Groomzilla? Thought not!

It's not about upstaging the bride. It's that intentionally flouting not wearing white to a wedding, especially your brother or sons wedding, can be perceived by the bride as a slight.

If you are aware of this, (which OP is, that's why she made the post) and you decide to do it anyway, you're showing you don't care how the bride will potentially feel.