AIBU to think my SIL was rude about my clothes?

[UninterestedInFashion]

Over the half term week we saw dh family a few times. A kids birthday party, family bbq and couple of outings to the park and pub.

I admit I’m not very fashionable , don’t really follow it and wear what I like and what suits me. For context this is what I wore each time Kids party : black 3/4 length leggings and striped vest top and converse
family bbq hibiscus pattern dress and sandals
park denim shorts and a vest top and sandals
pub same hibiscus dress (it’s very old I’ve had it years but I love it)

The first time SIL said ‘oh here’s Y2K girl’ and laughed at the dress. The second time I wore it she quietly said to me ‘a spotty dress would suit you better - polka dots are in right now’

When I wore the denim shorts she said ‘you’re brave ! They are very short ! How many years have you had those!’

When I wore the 3/4 leggings she again took me aside and said ‘let’s go shopping one day - you need some wide leg linen trousers not these leggings ! I’m surprised they even still sell them or are they vintage again ‘ and laughed?

I said to her no thanks I’m comfortable and it’s hot so I’m wearing what I like and what keeps me cool. She said ‘come on sometimes we all need a bit of a refresh!’

AIBU to think she was really rude ??? I didn’t feel hurt but just irritated.

I'm semi-interested in fashion but I would never, EVER comment on another woman's outfit. Same way I'd never comment on another woman's kitchen or furniture, etc.

My sister's SIL made a very bitchy and personal comment to me back in 2009 and I never spoke to her again. It didn't make any waves or cause any friction. I just decided I wouldn't go to any events or parties where she was. I never ask my sister how the woman is, either.

It took me years to get the confidence to decide what I want to do, and stick to it firmly, with no interest in pleasing other people aside from my immediate family. I'm not interested in other people's silly games and agendas.

It's fuck all to do with your SIL what you're wearing.

😏🙄at the people trying to say she might have your best interests at heart. It's a power play but probably comes from a place of insecurity. Smile, nod and ignore.

I'm reading that as her image IS her personality!

You are right to follow your own style, OP. It doesn’t need to be justified to anyone.

I realised for myself (no nosey SIL pointing it out), that some of my outfits were dated and I didn't have the body (nor the confidence) after a particularly unflattering photo was shared in a family chat, to carry off some fashions as effortlessly as I used to. My post-baby body was completely different.

"Let's go shopping you need some linen trousers"
"I would rather die"
Blunt. To the point. Totally Dramatic.

That’s what my sister was like. She’s calmed down somewhat now we’re older, and I’ve learned to tell her to fuck off 😂

Rude! The only time you comment on somebody else's clothes, is if you're paying them a compliment. If you've nothing nice to say, say nothing. That's a basic lesson in manners she appears to have forgotten.

Maybe you should be a personal shopper so you can change the style of someone who might appreciate your suggestions.

My SIL used to do this to me, but about my house (furniture, cushions, tableware etc)

One day I asked her whether she criticised her friends houses or was it just mine. She looked really shocked at my question and hasn't done it again since then

It's not her business to try and update OP's style unless she is asked. It's very rude to make disparaging comments about someone else's clothes. She can think what she likes but keep it zipped.

Fucking rude!

Are expletives necessary?

In that case I think so.

'Aw sil thats a bit mean isnt it? I like my dress'

Just keep it short and sweet and nothing she can respond too overly negatively.

I have a mum and sister who love to negatively comment on almost anything I wear to the point where if they say 'oh I like that' i'm now worried it looks awful.

I just tell them idc, but it took me years before I did. You got this

She’s very rude! You wear whatever you like, OP 💖

I’d just say ‘YOU want to take ME clothes shopping??’ Then look her up and down and say ‘riiiiigggghhhhht…’

Some of the comments on here - bloody hell

She's rude. That's the end.

Honestly, I sometimes feel sad about not having family, but this thread makes me feel relieved...

My sister used to do this a lot and make unasked for suggestions about my clothes, my house, my garden. When I challenged her she said she thought I'd appreciate it because she had a degree in Fine Art. I told her in no uncertain terms I did not appreciate it.

Fair point

I'd say yes.

How rude of her. My sister in law is not remotely interested in fashion. I’d not dream of making any sort of comment to her about her clothes.

She’s a cow. "Tell you what, Jemima, let’s make a deal: you won’t comment on my clothes and I won’t comment on yours. If I want your input I’ll let you know."

"While we're on the topic, you really shouldn't wear X, it's not flattering on you."

"Everyone, SiL thinks my clothes are shit. Does everyone agree or is she rude?"

"Look, SiL, and I mean this kindly, Fuck. Right Off."

Your clothes do sound dated but if you’re happy with them and don’t care that is fine. My sister dresses similarly and I don’t think she looks particularly good but I don’t say anything as it’s none of my business. As I tell my children “what is in your head doesn’t always need to come out of your mouth”

@UninterestedInFashion
And are we all to assume that she'd give both Vogue magazine and the Hollywood Red carpet a good run for their money?
Cheeky spiteful cow