Asking family to pay for own meals when invited out

[ThePeachLemur]

Its our DS's 18th this month and he's wanting to go to a local restaurant for a meal to celebrate, which is great. However, we want to invite the wider family. AIBU to request they pay for their own meal? The cost of eating out now is so expensive that it would cost us in excess of £500 and its money better spent elsewhere. We aren't skint, but like all of us, we have to be savvy. DH is embarrassed to ask his family to pay for their own meal. I've spoken to my side and its not an issue. Just hate feeling like I'm being tight.

Of course people are different.

Or stay home and never go out with friends/family because you can't afford to pay for them?
Read the room.

If I'm invited out I assume we're all paying for ourselves, it's just always been the way in my experience if people ask if I want to go to a restaurant. If I invite someone to a venue where I'm catering etc, I pay. I'm late-40s, middle class, it's always been a case of splitting the bill when I've been out.

What's with the BBQ obsession among Mumsnetters?

Agree, I hate BBQ. The meal at home suggestion only if your house and garden is big enough! I can fit about 10 extra people in my house. But they would have to sit on garden chairs etc.

Some posters just have no idea how other people live.
I wouldn't host a barbecue. I really CBA with the faff.
I can cater for a houseful of people, but not everyone can or wants to, and lots of people simply don't have a spare £500 to take people out for a meal.

It reminds me of a post some time ago when the OP asked for advice about where to put in a desk to WFH. The question was whether she should kick her DH out of a small room that he used for naps during the day. The advice was hilarious. Can't you work on the kitchen table? What about creating WFH space in your garden shed? Why don't you just work upstairs? It hardly occurred to the MN mansion dwellers that OP lived in a very small flat. It's quite unbelievable. Same here.