To have done a job interview at 20 weeks pregnant and not disclosed

[Kinekia]

I’m 25 weeks pregnant.

My original manager knew from 6 weeks in January as HG (severe morning sickness) kicked in at 6 weeks and I ended up on the sick for 2 months. After 2 months I returned as I’d found a medication protocol that allowed
me to get back to normality. I worked in an entry level customer service role. They have dozens of staff so my pregnancy didn’t really affect the team that much.

An internal role came up within the business in March. It would essentially be a promotion. Pay rise, more responsibilities (but generally nicer hours and less front-line customer contact, which is a huge bonus), no weekends, smaller team. I applied expecting nothing to come of it. I surprisingly got invited for an interview in April. I was 20 weeks when I interviewed. I had pondered over whether to disclose the pregnancy at the interview. This internal department is in a different part of the building to where I worked so they don’t know me at all. And my line manager at the time confirmed they wouldn’t tell them about the pregnancy and that it was up to me when I disclose. This job role that had come up was something I’ve desired to get into ever since joining the company, and I really wanted to give it my best shot, so I decided not to disclose, as was my legal right.

I interviewed at 20 weeks in April and felt I hid the bump well. We clicked really well at interview and they really liked me. They asked about pre-booked holidays etc. they then asked “Is there anything else we need to know about?” and I cheerfully said “no”. I felt awful about this at the time but on the other hand, as I said, I wanted them to review me as a candidate fairly without just being seen as “the pregnant candidate”.

Middle of May I got offered the role and accepted. The call where they offered the role was very rushed as they were snowed under, and I didn’t get chance to disclose the pregnancy as she said “Right I’ll be in touch when I’ve got a start date I need to go now, take care!” and abruptly hung up.

The next day (my final day before 17 days of annual leave) I messaged the new manager asking if she had time for a call and she never replied. I wanted to disclose the pregnancy then. I then went on the pre-booked
holiday and still didn’t have a start date.

Came back from my holiday and returned to work 26th May after the bank holiday and went to sit in my usual part of the office and got pulled away by my new manager, taken to their department and told I’m starting straight away. By this point I’m 25 weeks so I had to tell them. It was all quite rushed and they’ve been off with me ever since. Nobody has said anything but they aren’t friendly with me like they have been prior and at one point I was asked why I hadn’t disclosed at interview. They exclude me from friendly chat and I have to ask them what they want me to be doing with my time and my training.

I do feel awful for inconveniencing them but I don’t think I did anything wrong by not disclosing at interview. I had intended to tell them earlier than when I did but I just never got the right moment. I thought we’d have a time to sit down together and go through contracts etc and I would’ve mentioned it then but this never happened.

I have seen there is another woman on the team who is pregnant and due to go on leave so I suspect they had intended me to take over from her and that is why they are pissed off. They hadn’t told me this at interview though. Ironically I’m actually due before this other woman so I can see why they are fuming but legally I’ve not done anything wrong. It does prove that if I’d have disclosed at interview they probably would’ve not hired me and would’ve made up a non-pregnancy related reason to justify it.

Am I am awful employee? I’m concerned that my relationship with my managers will never recover from this and it’s a shame as I really have a huge interest in this role and have every intention of going back full-time after mat leave.

you need to make a formal complaint

That's really going to make sure she never get promoted.

First she screws them over (it may be legal but it ain't nice) then formally complains that they're not being super friendly to her.

I imagine timing was so that pregnant lady could have a handover period with the new hire. With the lag of hiring they're never going to make that work now and they can't go back to the other candidates to make a quick appointment.

I'd be pissed if I was the hiring manager.

Good on you for scoring the role. As you've said, and as we see every day in the workplace, women will be discriminated against for anything, and certainly if they are pregnant.

The point where they asked you "is there anything else we need to know?", is almost always usually "do you have any questions?". This indicates to me they knew you might be pregnant, and were asking so that you could say it without them outright asking you. Would they have rejected you had they known at this point? Probably, and that's why I applaud you for lying. You removed their power to sexually discriminate against you, and of course there are people here saying boohoo poor capitalists, poor management :( as if those same people wouldn't have you replaced in a millisecond if anything should happen to you. A company of this size will in no way struggle to find cover for your mat leave.

Oh, and them treating you poorly because of this is also discrimination. Expected, yes, but still discrimination.

You have to play the game to get to where you want, and you did. I think that's admirable. Enjoy mat leave and your new baby!

I agree with you to be honest. However legally I’ve acted I do need to accept I’ve started off my employment with them on the wrong foot. Unless their behaviour becomes actively harmful or bullying, I will be accepting it. At this stage it’s pretty much just not being chatty with me anymore. Not worth going to HR about.

I want to use my remaining 3 months there to try and rectify things as much as possible. I don’t intend to start leave until my due date for starters. Now my morning sickness is under control it’s an otherwise very manageable and easy pregnancy. Hopefully it remains that way and I can stay as long as possible. Obviously I’ll put mine and baby’s health first if need be but for now the plan is to stay until I’m due to drop

That comment is not going to go down well with the childfree! 😬

It’s not true anyway.

If you are a sole trader in a creative field, as I was, there is no business model. You hire a person to do the stuff you are not physically present to do, like looking after a small child while you are on another continent.

Well, I am a childless person. And this is what I see. I always feel like I'm treated as being less than working parents.

You’ve raised some very fair points on this thread but I do want to clarify my role is with one of the biggest health insurance companies in the UK. They aren’t hard up

I agree.

And?

The poster’s contribution to this thread has all been about how maternity leave screws over small businesses and people who hire nanny’s who then start a family themselves. I did start this thread to discuss my situation and not a general “what’s your opinion on mat leave” thread so I did want to make the clarification.

I'm sorry to hear that.

Oh, sorry I didn't realise. I didn't realise you were answering a particular poster and their points.

I agree with this and I think you were right not to disclose before you had the job. Discriminating againt someone in the grounds of pregnancy and maternity is illegal so by not telling them you kindly prevented them from doing something illegal. Which is sounds like they absolutely would have done if you had told them and indeed they are doing now.

this
and ultimately they can’t discriminate because you’re pregnant
the issue you’ve now got is that you lied to them which is never good
if speak to the new manager and apologise and say you didn’t want it to affect your chances, I would also engage in the 10 KIT days and make an effort to keep in touch with the team

Haven't RTFT but OP I dont think I could have done what you did 🙈 I applied for a job in my mat leave with DD1 and got it, found out I was pregnant with DD2 whilst still in my mat leave and arranged an appointment to speak to my manager soon after my 12 week scan to inform them as I felt that was the least I could do. Doesn't matter if I was obliged to or not, I just thought of it as common courtesy.

It’s difficult because it’s not good to lie but if you’d told the truth I doubt they would have appointed you. Everyone knows that. Sì you were in a no win situation.

This is discrimination. You have no obligation to disclose prwgnancy at interview. It has to be done by 25 weeks to qualify for material pay if other criteria is met. You have done nothing wrong - it is on them. I think we all have exactly like this and it makes me sad!

That is somewhat different. They should have greater capacity to accommodate a variety of situations than a small business. We can cope with an outbreak of measles for a week or 10 days, but 10 months of maternity leave would break everything. Hence, we would give another perfectly plausible reason that you weren't hired for the office manager job. For clarity, I was a sole trader but my OH has a small business. So two different situations.

You did nothing wrong and there was no obligation to, legally or morally to tell them.

I hire and manage staff and yes it would cause a massive inconvenience and I wouldn’t deny that. But it’s also not for you to worry about that, that’s the job of line managers. You have every right not to disclose.

covering pregnancy and maternity is just part and parcel of working life and needs to be taken in everyone’s stride.

But you already had the job though so there was nothing for you to lose by telling them. Whether you told them at 12 or 20 weeks made very little difference I suspect.

the Op almost certainly wouldn’t have got the job had she disclosed it when she interviewed.

Yeah I agree. If there's any implications they wouldn't have hired you because of it they know they're breaking employment law. So they have to accept it.

What are pregnant women who need a job actually supposed to do, then? Purposefully sabotage their own interviews for the benefit of a corporation?