To have done a job interview at 20 weeks pregnant and not disclosed

[Kinekia]

I’m 25 weeks pregnant.

My original manager knew from 6 weeks in January as HG (severe morning sickness) kicked in at 6 weeks and I ended up on the sick for 2 months. After 2 months I returned as I’d found a medication protocol that allowed
me to get back to normality. I worked in an entry level customer service role. They have dozens of staff so my pregnancy didn’t really affect the team that much.

An internal role came up within the business in March. It would essentially be a promotion. Pay rise, more responsibilities (but generally nicer hours and less front-line customer contact, which is a huge bonus), no weekends, smaller team. I applied expecting nothing to come of it. I surprisingly got invited for an interview in April. I was 20 weeks when I interviewed. I had pondered over whether to disclose the pregnancy at the interview. This internal department is in a different part of the building to where I worked so they don’t know me at all. And my line manager at the time confirmed they wouldn’t tell them about the pregnancy and that it was up to me when I disclose. This job role that had come up was something I’ve desired to get into ever since joining the company, and I really wanted to give it my best shot, so I decided not to disclose, as was my legal right.

I interviewed at 20 weeks in April and felt I hid the bump well. We clicked really well at interview and they really liked me. They asked about pre-booked holidays etc. they then asked “Is there anything else we need to know about?” and I cheerfully said “no”. I felt awful about this at the time but on the other hand, as I said, I wanted them to review me as a candidate fairly without just being seen as “the pregnant candidate”.

Middle of May I got offered the role and accepted. The call where they offered the role was very rushed as they were snowed under, and I didn’t get chance to disclose the pregnancy as she said “Right I’ll be in touch when I’ve got a start date I need to go now, take care!” and abruptly hung up.

The next day (my final day before 17 days of annual leave) I messaged the new manager asking if she had time for a call and she never replied. I wanted to disclose the pregnancy then. I then went on the pre-booked
holiday and still didn’t have a start date.

Came back from my holiday and returned to work 26th May after the bank holiday and went to sit in my usual part of the office and got pulled away by my new manager, taken to their department and told I’m starting straight away. By this point I’m 25 weeks so I had to tell them. It was all quite rushed and they’ve been off with me ever since. Nobody has said anything but they aren’t friendly with me like they have been prior and at one point I was asked why I hadn’t disclosed at interview. They exclude me from friendly chat and I have to ask them what they want me to be doing with my time and my training.

I do feel awful for inconveniencing them but I don’t think I did anything wrong by not disclosing at interview. I had intended to tell them earlier than when I did but I just never got the right moment. I thought we’d have a time to sit down together and go through contracts etc and I would’ve mentioned it then but this never happened.

I have seen there is another woman on the team who is pregnant and due to go on leave so I suspect they had intended me to take over from her and that is why they are pissed off. They hadn’t told me this at interview though. Ironically I’m actually due before this other woman so I can see why they are fuming but legally I’ve not done anything wrong. It does prove that if I’d have disclosed at interview they probably would’ve not hired me and would’ve made up a non-pregnancy related reason to justify it.

Am I am awful employee? I’m concerned that my relationship with my managers will never recover from this and it’s a shame as I really have a huge interest in this role and have every intention of going back full-time after mat leave.

Right or wrong, legal or otherwise, no. They will never trust you again.

it might not be right. It is the reality.

I’m afraid that seems very unfair to the new department who presumably wanted a colleague who could start in the next few weeks. It would have been more ethical to explain you’re pregnant and negotiate on start dates.

For further context it’s not a small business, it’s a huge multi-billion pound insurance corporation so financially they will be fine but I do appreciate it’s an absolute ballache for the department manager. They hired 2 of us and are also hiring more internally.

I had a gut feeling they wouldn’t have hired if I’d have told them and since joining the team and seeing another pregnant colleague my suspicions have all but been confirmed unfortunately. I don’t think there’d have been much negotiation. It would’ve been a rejection and feedback of “need more experience”.

No you did nothing wrong. Women should not be penalised and miss out on opportunities because they are pregnant. This is exactly why the law reflects that.

I would be speaking with ACAS - what they are doing from what I can understand is illegal.

www.acas.org.uk/pregnancy-at-work

Honestly - I think you deceived them. Sorry, but it wasn’t a great thing to do.

I think the spot where this went wrong was leaving on holiday and delaying the disclosure. Even if it meant interrupting your break, i would have gotten in contact with your new manager as early as possible at that point.

Agree! If anyone mentions it again you say “because in many cases pregnancy is seen as a reason not to hire somebody and I didn’t want that being used against me, even subconsciously.”

I definitely should’ve been more forward with ensuring they knew before the holiday. I had messaged her on Teams (we were working remotely) saying “Hiya X. Do you have time
for a quick call? I just need to run some things by you regarding the new role and I’m about to be away for 17 days.” I had sent the message in the morning and got no response as she was in a a meeting all day. I should’ve been pushier and when it got to the evening with no response I should’ve emailed.

they then asked “Is there anything else we need to know about?” and I cheerfully said “no”

This part is the problem.

No it's not. They didn't need to know she was pregnant.

I feel like this question is a roundabout way of asking a female interviewee if they are pregnant or not. They’d already asked about pre-booked holidays and noted them and we’d already discussed that I was planning a long-term career within the organisation. We’d already discussed my entire employment history and education so they knew I wasn’t about to swan off to go to uni or take a career break etc. So what else could they have been fishing for with that question right at the end of the interview? But of course they can’t legally ask if I’m pregnant so they have to just ask it generically.

But then of course I’m going to look like a twat for answering “no” to such a question. And feel like a twat as well.

You have got the job you wanted. They employed you maybe the relationship with the managers won’t be the same but you took the choice not to disclose all you can do is now crack on with the job.

You should have told them after formally accepting the role. That way you would have been protected and they wouldn’t feel like they have been deceived.

But you didn’t. The business already knew, and they shouldn’t be penalising you regardless of their personal feelings. I’d keep examples of where their behaviour towards you differs towards colleagues and previously and write a note to HR, saying that you appreciate that the circumstances aren’t ideal but you are noticing these behaviours- detail them- and confirm your commitment to the company. That way if they are tempted to do anything stupid you’ll already have something formally documented.

But then of course I’m going to look like a twat for answering “no” to such a question. And feel like a twat as well.

Don't feel like that OP.

If they were fishing then they shouldn't have been as that would be discriminatory. You answered professionally and honestly. They did not need to know about your pregnancy, why would they if they weren't intending to discriminate against you. Hold your head up high.

It covers a lot of other things as well, such as current or future caring responsibilities, illnesses, planned surgery, anything that might require adjustments or flexibility.

The way I justified it was that they don’t need to know until they’ve offered me the job. I wanted to be considered on an even keel to other candidates. Being 20 weeks pregnant would’ve affected their decision. Sure, they can’t legally alter their decision based that but it’s easy to come up with any old bollocks on a rejection email isn’t it?

Not to sound arrogant but I could tell they liked me during the interview, their body language and just generally how chatty they were sort of told me that I had it in the bag. I didn’t want to just throw a bomb on it all

Exactly.

You didn't do anything wrong but you can understand why they're annoyed. You're 25 weeks pregnant, they're going to train you up, can you do all parts of your job or will you need a risk assessment for parts of it? and then you're off for potentially a year, potentially wanting to come back part time or reduced hours. You're saying we'll of course I'm coming back full time and working here for years, but you simy don't know.

Should the management be professional? Yes. Should thry be reading you badly? No. You have every right to speak to HR if you feel you're being treated unfairly.

You were right not to disclose , you haven't deceived anyone. Start keeping a note of anything that is happening like exclusion etc.

Of course they did - because they specifically asked about holidays booked, clearly indicating that they wanted to know if there were absence periods coming. Maternity leave is just that. Whilst you might not have done anything wrong legally, you have fucked them over - they hired you because they needed an employee to work soon, that’s kind of the point of hiring.

They aren’t being friendly to you. Seeing as you are obsessed with legalities, do they have a legal obligation to make chit chat with you? No. would you make chit chat with someone who deceived you? You hid the bump deliberately and you said there was nothing else for them to be aware of so I would say thats
deception , even if legally you’ve done nothing wrong.

No, they didn't need to know. They wanted to know. But that's a different thing.

I don’t think you did anything wrong. You legally don’t have to disclose at interview or offer stage. I interviewed and was offered a role whilst pregnant. After offer, I disclosed I was pregnant. Got an email a week later saying they’d have to withdraw the offer due to a business reason, but I know it was due to me being 20wks pregnant.

Sure they may be off with you, but that potentially indicates they’d have rejected you if they’d known. It’s not a breach of trust as you didn’t have to disclose at that stage. They’ll get over it when you prove why they hired you in the first place.

I agree with this. No need to disclose at interview. But you should have mentioned it soon after accepting the position.

First post is also food for thought. They might never trust you again and getting promotions in the future will prove more difficult. Also, is there a probation attached to the position?