AIBU to confront workmen about stealing my engagement ring?

[Marooney]

TLDR- workmen are only people who could have taken my engagement ring, do I confront them?

Need some urgent advice please-

We’ve had 2 workmen here for several days repairing the patio. They don’t need access to the house and come in and out the side passage which leads directly to the garden from outside. One of the men has done several jobs with/for DP over the years, let’s call him Bob, the other guy is an assistant DP doesn’t know.

On Monday night DP left my new engagement ring in its box on a table near the front door as he was going to take it to have a small adjustment done, however on Tuesday morning he forgot and on Wednesday noticed it wasn’t there. He assumed I’d taken it but I hadn’t and there’s no one else in the house, no cleaner or visitors, no one. We live in a rural area and I haven’t always been locking the front door when I pop out on errands as the builders are around - I never thought they themselves might be a risk- and it’s a cul-de-sac so no one passes by except one middle aged neighbour who we’re friendly with, walking her dog. Our Ring doorbell has not recorded any stranger entering our front gate.

We don’t know what to do. Obviously we can’t accuse with no proof, but it seems clear that one of them has taken it. My only idea so far is to have a word with Bob, ask him a bit about the other guy and how long he’s known him etc then say a ring has gone missing and we’d rather sort it out now than look through days of Ring camera footage (we have cameras but unfortunately not in that area, but he doesn’t need to know that). That way at least we’d be implying to Bob that we don’t think it’s him. Incidentally, DP hasn’t categorically said that it couldn’t be Bob.

Any suggestions gratefully received!

Nothing! He stole nothing! Not the ring! Not anything else, nothing!

You wonder if he’s stolen other things? On top of the ring he didn’t steal?

I would respect OP far more if she owned up to the fact that she suspected and went into a lot of detail about the builders, but she’s not going to do that, seems determined to minimise it. I don’t care what happens to her ring with an attitude like hers towards the builders tbh. It’s the accusing innocent people which sticks in my gullet. Cleaner has got off scot free “oh she’s lovely wouldn’t steal it!”.

I think the cleaner and Bob's mate were in cahoots and OP was right when she suspected he had the ring box hidden under his clothes .

He found out he was Number One suspect when confronted by Bob so he gave it to the cleaner who put it in a box on a shelf in a cupboard in a different room to where it had been originally. Obviously !

Yes, he is that. Seriously, you’re offended? Also the context of that description was that he doesn’t care about money and was unlikely to have stolen the ring, how convenient of you to ignore that 🤣

She didn’t steal it, what’s your beef? I told her she’d caused a lot of upset and left it at that.

Oh come on. You know what you were implying.

You now say he's "unlikely to have stolen the ring" whereas previously you said "workmen are only people who could have taken my engagement ring".

Keep digging 🙄

Read my reply properly. I can see your cleaner didn’t steal it. It’s the responses you’ve given to her vs builders that irritate me. I’ll F off now as I can see your character here on this thread from a mile off and it’s not pleasant.

Absurd. Of course I suspected the builders, I started this thread on that basis, it’s in the title and the OP. I then changed my mind after talking to Bob later in the day. It’s just so, so simple to understand and yet you don’t. I did not accuse the friend to his face, he knows nothing about it. There’s currently no one in existence who thinks that guy stole a ring,

Do you really truly not understand the concept of changing one’s mind? Really?

I can’t stand people like OP. Which is why I’m defending myself and questioning what she’s posted. My boyfriend is in construction and my dad was a painter and decorator, uncle was a roofer. To think that someone like OP could so easily think of accusing workers like them of theft based on job (?!) and them being on her property, it really pisses me off and offends me on their behalf. She can dig all she likes but she knows what she posted.

Read that post, it was specifically about how we didn’t think it was him at all. No implications whatsoever. Honestly the one with the off character here isn’t me..

You certainly banged on about it far more than you’re making out here. And why suspect the builders anyway in the first place?! Just because they’re builders. Do you think you’re above them or something because that’s what you’re making out. You’re just irritated it wasn’t the builders but was in fact your cleaner.

Based on their job?? Did you not read any of the many many posts about DP being a tradesman? You’ve got this so wrong it’s almost unbelievable, and yet I do believe it based all your other misunderstandings

But you thought it was his mate? You said so.

Character then. Oh yes I did see about your DP being a tradie.

I understand perfectly. You suspected Bob first off then his mate.

Yes I did, that’s what this post was about. Have you got it yet? I thought it was someone and then I changed my mind. Do you see?

What did I say about their characters? We really like Bob and the other guy kept himself to himself, I know nothing about his character. You’re just inventing things I’ve said about them which is weird. I like hippy bikers, no issue there at all!

Bye bye

I couldn’t have been more pleased to learn that the ring wasn’t stolen, and to suggest otherwise is just peculiar. Who would want their ring to have been stolen rather than tidied away?

Yeah, and when called out on it, the faux naive, ‘you’ve got me all wrong, I’m just asking a question’

And yet there it was in that small, sparse area. Not in any of those pawn shops...lets not forget "it’s probably already sold or pawned"

Suspecting people of theft is the lowest of the low. Especially as in this case they’re innocent.