Partner’s son’s wedding no invite

[heidi696]

So my partner of about 6 months - his son is getting married in about a months time but he told me I’m not invited. Im thinking it’s because we are only “new” ? I mean it hasn’t really bothered me but he wants me to go with him to pick out a new suit and I’m hearing about it nearly every day obviously my partner is excited and I was thinking it would be nice to get dressed up and be included- even if they didn’t want me in family photos which I would understand of course. Is this normal - not to be invited.

Partner??? At 6 months you’re just dating

My dad has been with my step mum now for ages, but before her there was a string of girlfriends (some who were great, some who were clinically insane). Even the ones who I really liked I wouldn’t have invited to my wedding because it’s awkward. Where are they sitting? They’re gonna be in the photos? So much to consider.

It depends what your relationship with his son is like. Have you only met a handful of times or do you see him and wife to be regularly? If the latter, I would have said at the very most, an evening invitation but absolutely not the day. I wouldn’t be spending £60+ on someone that may not be around in the next six months.

Normal not to be invited but at the same time it isn't your job to make sure it all goes smoothly for your partner. Step back and let him get on with the organising.

I think you are totally normal to want to be invited and I think it is quite unusual for your partner's son to want you to look at suits and not invite you to the wedding.

@heidi696
"...his mum is not going - they are estranged and she lives abroad. But yeh it makes sense . I feel awkward to go anyway."

I can see how this might make the situation more difficult but I also think it is sad he is not inviting you.

Do you think your relationship with your partner will last? Does your partner?

six months may not be long to some but some folks get married after 6 months.

The groom is perfectly entitled not to invite you but hen why ask you to look at suits with him?

I had been with my partner maybe two months when his son got engaged and ten months when he got married. I wasn't invited. I was fine with it. His ex wife was going and I didn't particularly want the stress of the encounter anyway. I think a lot also depends on the size of the wedding, small weddings often don't have plus ones for people who are not very well known to family circle

We recently got married and if my dad had a new girlfriend of 6 months I wouldn’t have invited her, nor would I refer to her as his partner.

I thought you were going to say you've been together for five years! Six months is too early. He's still your boyfriend at this point, not your partner.

I don't think it's weird at all to wonder why you haven't been invited at least to the reception. When my friend got married my ex who was a mate of her husband started seeing someone a few weeks earlier and she got an evening invite

Lots of people get an invite to bring a guest. I know I did at a few weddings when I was single. I didn't always bring one but the offer was there

The partner’s son is getting married

The partner has asked the OP to look at suits with him, which sounds rather charming to me. He values her opinion and wants her company when he decides.

Is there a specific day that someone changes from a boyfriend to a partner?

A friend of mine (ironically the same one who asked my exes new gf to her wedding) split from her husband. Started seeing someone new almost immediately. Was pregnant within a few months and married the following year.

Was he only her boyfriend even though she was pregnant?

Op does your partner know how you feel?

I don't think it sounds charming. She's not invited and she's to help him pick a suit. I think it sounds thoughtless

You likely were not even together when they started planning this wedding

Why would they invite you after six months? He’s not even your partner at that point - he is your boyfriend. I think it’s odd that you would be bothered tbh

You're not being silly. I'd be hurt too. 6 months is a decent amount of time and if it was my wedding, there's no question about it - I'd invite you. It seems incredibly rude not to imo

@heidi696because when you split up they won't have a random woman in their wedding photos

Likely already booked before you even met!

That doesn't mean that extra guests can't be invited at night

The OP doesn't have to be in the wedding photos

Do people always have to have their feelings dismissed in this way.

I often feel that the reactions about certain things on here are so bizarre. I think it's more odd for an invite not to be extended to the OP and don't think being with someone for 6 months is a "new" relationship. So what if the invites went out before they got together. Wedding guest lists change all the time. I would have happily invited someone to my wedding even if they had been with the person 6 weeks never mind 6 months.

Don't even get me started on the reactions from people about introducing new partners to children after anything less than 2 years 😂

Not weird that you would like to go - I love a wedding!
Also not weird that you aren't invited, as son's dad will no doubt be busy with family on the day and you would end up being left alone with people you don't know.
Though if it was me, I'd have let my dad invite you to the evening reception. But I don't know if it's just a Scottish thing where we have evening only guests.

Of course it is normal. Wedding has likely been planned for a couple of years. You have been together a few months. Weddings are expensive!