AIBU to feel upset there are no photos of my proposal?

[KatieHW]

DP proposed to me a couple of weeks ago. I feel really sad he didn’t arrange for anyone to capture this, there’s no photos let alone videos. I have said to him in the past that if I was to ever get engaged then it would be important for me to be able to look back on it in the future. When I put in my friends group chat I was engaged they all asked to see what happened and it was embarrassing to say DP didn’t think of this.

I had no idea this was a thing! We got engaged back in the early 2000s, so no social media. It was a far easier and simpler time.

dump him OP he will never live up to your expectations

let him find someone who will actually appreciate him

I can definitely tell that this is going to be a long, successful and happy marriage without any issues. Congratulations.

God, it’s actually fascinating to me that anyone is this vacuous.

More than one person, too!

OP, maybe you should restage it with a videographer. That way you can concentrate on the important things like what you’re wearing, and getting lit from a flattering angle. And obviously a big close up on your perfectly made up face as you clap your French mani to your cheeks and squeal ‘Oh, Dave!’ in well-rehearsed delighted surprise.

You and your friends sound impossible.
He proposed because he loves you and wants to spend the rest of his life with you (and somehow he can see past your shallowness).

Instead of being happy you are ruining the moment wondering why you don't have any memories... do you have memory loss?

The poor lad is in for a rough life

Ffs, how ridiculous.

if you want to be able to look back on your engagement, then surely that happens every time you look at your engagement ring?!

If, on announcing you were engaged, more than one of your friends asked for video/photo footage of the deed, rather than saying ‘ah, can I see the ring?’ then that’s odd in itself.

My now fiancé arranged a photographer and it was an elaborate proposal. However the pictures are just for us and we've framed some around the house, but haven't shared them on social media.

Was that why you wanted them OP? If it was just for instagram then I think it's a bit daft. But if you wanted them just for you both to look back on then I understand your feelings.

🤣
Any engagement video I've seen (not by seeking them out) has been embarrassing. Not having one is normal and fine.

Just when you think you've read it all....🤦🤦

Unless on reality TV, very few people have photos of their proposal.

Congratulations on your engagement!

If there's no photos did it even really happen?

Why not do an engagement photoshoot or even make an AI video of it?

How silly and shallow!

I couldn’t even imagine asking to see photos or a video of a friends engagement? Lovely if they send an selfie or a ring pic but that’s it. Are you American OP as I think it’s more of a “thing” there.

Why on earth would you friends want to see what happened? Surely a proposal is an intimate moment between the couple themselves.

A photo of the ring is enough.

I imagine this to be followed by endless social media posts about the wedding planning, "saying yes to the dress" and being "in my bridal era" 🥱

I’ve been reminded of Ben Elton’s novel Blind Faith, set in a future where the desire for privacy has come to be regarded as a perversion and people are expected to video and share everything on social media including the loss of your virginity and giving birth. I read it years ago and it seems frighteningly prescient now.

Thanks for the laugh op! I'd dump him now. Imagine your disappointment if he wears the wrong colour shoes to the wedding???

Haha good one OP 😂😂😂

Exactly this, I don’t use socials so it wasn’t for that x

DH proposed to me in the car sat outside our house after we had been to the cinema 46 years ago. I said yes. That's all that is needed.

I don't understand why people have to make an Instagram moment out of everything that happens in their life.

Sorry, but you need to get over yourself.

Do you want to be married to your fiance? If yes, then that's all that matters.

Don't be daft. It was a private moment between 2 people. Not a story for the internet.

Don’t try to think/live like an influencer OP. Not everything has to be about the gram.

Live in the moment

Bloody hell! What am I reading? Utterly shallow and performative. I pity your husband. Marriage is about your relationship not about milestone moments captured for social media. Grow up.

I don't think the OP is getting the answers she wanted.

Anyone else waiting for the OP to drip-feed they've lived together for years and have 5 kids? 😁

You sound ridiculous take a photo of you 2 together holding your hand up with the ring on to show your engaged if you really want to but a proposal shouldn't be performative its a special moment between 2 people