AIBU to find my husband's constant undressing at home annoying?

[saamantha19881]

My husband has asked me to post on here to guage opinions.
The minute he gets in the door he takes his top off, often- his trousers too and will just be wearing pants. He says it is more comfortable.

I'm starting to find it really annoying, once in a while if it's really hot it makes sense. But it is literally all summer and winter. It means he can't ever answer the door, just pop into the garden or grab something from the car. And to be honest, I just don't like it.

Apparently it is completely normal (his dad did it too) and he thinks I would be surprised because everyone does this in their own homes??

Safety - children’s friends - being ready to answer door etc

Omg!

so your kids friends would be seeing the shape of his Willy swinging around!’

omg 🤦‍♀️

please show him our responses

he probably thinks you are abnormal
one

I mean I think it’s odd to do it as he immediately comes through the door tbh. But no odder than women who take their bras off as soon as they get in.
Dh will sometimes take his top off when cooking because he gets too hot. Not if we have guests! He wears shorts all year round (he dresses appropriately for occasions/events, the shorts are for being comfortable at home) - he just runs hot.

My DH wears those, basically stretchy tight Y fronts with legs on them. Says they are very comfortable. Wouldn't dream of not wearing trousers though!

Please tell us at least that they are black not white or patterned?

What obvious reasons?

Bras are uncomfortable, ime. I think it is odder, women would leave their shirt on, bra or no bra.

Omg no comparison

you are still
fully dressed without a bra on

I don’t wear a bra so by your reasoning I can go out in the street with only my knickers on and it’s totally fine and not weird

begs belief

Well there is one in my reply already

OP Please please tell us what he does when visitors come - esp your kids friends

Lack of pants is not much different in terms of fabric, but really quite different in terms of getting an eye-full!

I actually think no pants is bordering on indecency with children round.

Couldn't get worked up about DH in his underpants. But if it really bothers you, maybe ask a friend to "pop in" unannounced and he might start to feel less comfortable. But honestly, even if I visited someone and they had boxers on in their own home (which is what I think you are meaning?) it is really no different from shorts. Y-fronts might have me a bit 😬

It's all very Onslow sounding, but even he was more dressed than just little underpants. I would hate to sit and eat dinner with someone who is just in their underwear. I would also hate for my kids to grow with that being normalised. I'm not in the slightest bit prudish but for the same reason I don't like seeing topless men in the supermarket, I don't want one in just his pants sitting at my dinner table every night.

My DD said today that she’s married a man just like her father. Spends evenings with just the two of them (they’ve a baby) in his keeks. My DH does put shorts on if others about and a shirt too if not family.
I’ve been married for 35 years and tolerance has played a bit part in that.

A man refusing to ever leave his bedroom without a top on sounds a hell of a lot weirder to me than a man who'll happily wander about in his pants.

OP, assuming he's not wearing pants when you have guests, and your kids aren't old enough to be embarrassed by it, I really can't see why anyone would be bothered or annoyed by seeing their own partner's body. I find it really odd that some people are saying 'He shouldn't be doing something that you don't like' as if people have the right to control what their partner does in his/her own home, even though it's completely harmless, just because you have an arbitrary preference against it.

I was doing a dumbbell workout in the living room in my very un-glamorous undies yesterday. Fortunately my DP didn't seem to be mortally offended by that, although it certainly couldn't have been pleasant to look at.

I would worry about the heating bills. And how are we going to save the planet if people don't wear winter clothes in winter?

I would be astounded if I visited a friend and her DH was only in pants - I wouldn’t reason it away with oh well it’s just like shorts - it simply does not translate

so you wouldn’t be astounded if your husband went to a friends and his wife was in bra and panties? You’d think it’s really no different from a bikini

I change into (clean) pjs or loungewear the second I get home, take my bra off and shove my hair up. Suppose that’s a similar thing.

Oh, then ignore my last.

I think that's different from boxers. If there's a visible "package" that's a bit grim on a normal family day round the house.

It's not the same thing at all!

That's ridiculous, too hot for anything but skin tight boxers?
The fact that it makes you uncomfortable should mean a compromise is in order, such as shorts with a t shirt near the front door so he can still answer it.

And just because his dad didn't it, doesn't make it right for him to do it.

He sounds selfish, self obsessed and hard work tbh

That isn’t the question - when my husband works out in the lounge he only wears pants

It is not he can’t do it - it’s that he needs to negotiate and comprise with his life partner as in all relationships

Yeah that is annoying so you are constantly in view of a sculpted outline of his genitalia. Not ideal 24/7!

We all change immediately upon arriving home. (I have severe allergies and it keeps the house clean) We have lounge clothing though.

Yes - there a lot of things our grandparents did that we wouldn’t

On the whole hit children freely and think wife’s only place is in the kitchen are two that instantly come to mind

Small skin-tight boxers? I can't imagine that. Boxers are loose. Sounds like Y-fronts with a slight leg-short.

I wouldn't want to look at the mainly naked body all night to be honest .. unless he is totally ripped. It also depends on what the underpants look like.