AIBU to be upset that preschool is not supporting potty training?

[If123]

Hi All,

am I being unreasonable to be upset/ put out by preschool being unsupportive with potty training daughter?

DD is 2.5 years and has just started preschool after Easter so has been going to the preschool for 3 weeks or so. We are also potty training which has started a week ago. She is doing really well at home and has had a few accidents to be expected but is doing well weeing on the potty. She is only going to preschool a couple of afternoons a week. Anyway when I’ve gone to pick her up from preschool I have been called into the office. They have said that she is not weeing on the potty at preschool and had a couple of accidents and they suggested putting her in pull up nappies. She had been in pull ups for months previously and not made any progress potty training. They said she had tried to run off while being changed and that it (having accidents) was disrupting her play time. I was quite upset because I felt this would confuse her and put back her progress. I have also seen the health visitor recently who agreed we should encourage her as much as possible and put her in normal pants to help her feel when she is wet. They have also been critical about her on other days saying she can’t drink from a cup properly and is very ‘busy’ and won’t sit still. AIBU to be upset and anoyed at the lack of support from preschool? Do they just not like her? It’s upset me they don’t seem to have a nice or supporting or encouraging thing to say.

I know. I was pointing out that a potty was available when a poster said “she can’t use what isn’t there”.
so I don’t understand the relevance of your comment in regard to this?

At our local preschool a child has to be dry and toilet ready to considered for a place. 2 and half is a reasonable age for this. I don't know why so many parents nowadays don't seem to think this is important.

Fortunately our local preschools didn’t break the law by discriminating against disabled children like that or my DC would have been denied education until yr 1 and have been even further behind despite working incredibly hard at all their therapies when other children that age could just play.

That’s actually against the law🤦🏼‍♀️The place needs to be in line with the disability discrimination act, the laws of this country try apply to them.

There is a lot in the media about it. It doesn’t sounds like a very good place. Perhaps you need to highlight the law to them, not sure it sounds like a place that’s good for children, especially any with disabilities, diagnosed or otherwise. Shocking.

The preschool near me is the same they don't accept kids that aren't potty trained they don't have the staff to be changing kids nappies all day especially when the law requires that two staff must do the job

Because their like OP and would rather leave the hard stuff to others so it's thier fault when it goes to hell

She is at preschool which she’s clearly not ready for.

That isn't a law 😂

Two and a half is an age when maybe a significant proportion would be doing it. Not all . Maybe by three most would but for those who can't there are often reasons. Disability, or problem with bladder.

She "is not weeing on the potty in pre-school"
"has had a couple of accidents"

These two are substantially different things, so which is it really?
If she has done several wees on the potty, but missed a couple of times, insist that they do their job and change her. If the staff can't change the occasional accident, then they aren't set up to be a pre-school.

If she isn't "weeing on the potty in pre-school", then she is not using the potty at all, either isn't trying or is not aware until far too late. She is having multiple accidents and needing changing several times a session. No the staff won't have the time to be reminding her every few minutes or changing her so often. She needs to be back in nappies or taken out of group care until her toileting improves.

I had a friend when my kids were little who took her son out of nappies at 18 months as was potty training. This consisted of trying to catch every wee and get him onto the potty in time. In reality he just weed all over my carpet and sofa when they came round which I found quite rude. He just wasn't ready for potty training.

Can I ask what is meant by Preschool? Where i live there are private nurseries from baby age and then a school nursery which starts the year before reception. What is a preschool that a 2 year old can go to if it’s not a private nursery?

Preschools usually run 9-3 term times and take children from 2, they're often run by churches, charities, community organisations or parent committee though some are privately owned. Less formal than school nurseries.

For example
https://westburybaptistpreschool.org.uk/
https://chapelstreetpreschool.org.uk/

ah ok thanks