Friends going out and sending pics to the uninvited 😵‍💫

[BrownEyedLassie]

Can’t quite understand what’s going on here. Genuinely perplexed.

We are a group of 6 neighbours. We only know each other because we’re neighbours, no other connection besides that.

We have all known each other a number of years. We have a group chat where we chat and share photos etc. We go out a handful of times a year and have girly nights in too. But keep in touch every few days via the chat, and in person as we all live close, so see each other in the street.

Tonight, 2 of the women have gone out together. I certainly wasn’t invited and I know that the other women in the group are all at home alone. The 2 who are out, are sending multiple messages, photos and videos of the night out to the Group chat.

No idea what to make of it. I’m a bit 😵‍💫 as I’m sure the other women and me would have loved a night out rather than sitting in alone on a Saturday night.

What do you think is going on here?

I know everyone is entitled to do whatever they want. But it’s a bit odd, no? To exclude others and then send all the pics. It’s not something I would do.

If 5 of them were out without you, i can see why it would sting but if it’s just 2 members of the group of 6 i can’t really see why anyone needs to mind. As someone said upthread, i think if anything they are trying to include everyone.

Less than half is fine. They haven’t ’left you out’. They’ve just gone out

I would never be in any group, form or chat with a neighbour to start with. Especially the women

They haven't done anything wrong. Two friends going out together is just that. They're clearly not being sly or shady about it. My friends often post pictures of nights out,.I like seeing them have fun. I certainly wouldn't see it as a personal slight.

When you posted this it was still time to invite the other women round with a bottle of wine.

@BrownEyedLassie jokey response ‘did we miss an invite?’

It's not a case of one person being left out, more a probably spontaneous let's go out. As you said, you're all friends because you're neighbours amd that's great. However I wouldn't want them to be my main source of friends, like school Mums. Having established true meaningful friendships before now, any extra like neighbours is a bonus but I really wouldn't want to go in too deep, just meet ups now and again. Xx

Have they bumped into each other whilst out

I would say - count me in next time, I’m due a night out! Anyone free on the Xth?

It is a bit odd, but then equally that is kind of what SM is for isn't it: "Look at MEEEEE everybody!!"

It’s incredibly juvenile to get upset because two friends have gone out without you. And it’s a bit of a stretch to think they’re ‘looking for a reaction’ by posting on your WhatsApp. If you wanted to go out, it was up to you to suggest it, not sit about at home bemoaning.

Two woman can go out together without seeking group approval first. Hw it came about is none of your business, and probably mundane.

They posted because they are thinking about you guys.

Dont make it into something it’s not and ruin the nice neighbourly thing you have going on.

Pricisely nothing but would look pathetic

Voice of reason at last. You are not 16 presumably

This!

Two people are allowed to go out together OP!

If it were three or four of them I'd be annoyed I'd been left out, but two of them going out on there own could have been for a whole range of reasons.

Tell the others to come over tonight with a bottle of wine since its bank hol.

Agree. It's a non issue for me

They have posted whilst being drunk or in an excited mood without too much reasoning I think. Many people do. It seems you're not really friends so don't be too bothered. Perhaps those two ladies are closer.

I wouldn't chase them, but if you really care open a thread inviting others in the chat for a night out to start a tradition

I dont have to be invited or included in everything and can see photos of others people's events without relating it to me

If you make them the centre of your friends where this is an issue for you maybe make other friends, it doesn't sound healthy

They aren’t saying that - you are choosing to interpret it this way op.

Sometimes I'd just rather go out with one person than it be an inevitably noisier group event, I don't think I could be put out by this.

Posting in the group chat is v odd imo. As PP said I agree these type of friendships fizzle out eventually

They probably thought they were sending pictures to each other and have just responded to each other posts, not realising it was in the wrong chat

But come on, grow up, people are allowed to go out!

I honestly can't believe that grown up women behave like 12 year old girls.
People don't have to go out in large groups all the time. It's just not a mentality I get. It's controlling jealous and enviously absolutely off-putting and anyone like this would be dropped as a potential friend quicker than quick.