Aghast at DP’s tightness at home

[Werusb]

I’ve moved in with my DP - had stayed plenty of times with no issue.

I am now seeing a different side of him, he is so so tight when it comes to energy usage, water etc.

He is constantly moaning about me using the oven, he has one bathroom and his latest thing is not flushing it too often regardless of use. So today for example, he used it at about 9.30. I freaked out when I went in and flushed then mentioned to him. He said that he read online about a new thing where it’s only flushed twice a day at 1pm and before bed. Just grim!

It is his flat but I can’t be expected to go along with this surely?!

You could do the brick in the cistern to reduce the flush volume if he is that worried about it. But it is a bit gross if you are just moving in a gf and you wonder what else will be revealed later.

I'm with this too. There are 5 males here using the loo 3 at home all day. We stopped flushing unless its code brown. Cos of last year's drought. We have saved a lot of money my monthly payment has been reduced by £18 a month and last year we started in deficit and this year we are in credit.
But flushing twice a day is extreme. We flush when necessary..

If you are not allowed to cook that is a huge red flag.

Did you never stay over in his flat before now. Edit, sorry I see that you did.

Strange behaviour if he was ok about all that stuff before you moved in fully.

Move out. Nothing worse than a tight man with money

I've never written this before on MN - but LTB.

I could not tolerate that or being moaned at for using the oven.

I lived with a penny pincher for 20 years and I can tell you it's a right turn off and not sexy at all....

I could never live with someone like this again. In addition to which I might add, my partner was in the 1% of wealth. He could afford to use hot water, turn the heating up, flush the toilet and not check every single supermarket item for the cheapest one if town but he just loved 'efficiencies'.

There is more to life than saving a quid here and there, if you live at that level, IMHO.

So how often is "flush when necessary"?

@Werusb sounds grim and ridiculous. What's the alternative to using the oven by the way? The microwave?

it sounds more like some weird neurosis. I don't think it's genuinely money saving thing unless he's about to tell you he's in several thousand pounds of debt. And about to lose his job.

1pm? That’s a really odd time. Does he come home from work to do it?

I'd happily pay £18 a month not to have to see and smell manpiss.

Congratulations on discovering he's a lunatic now, OP, before you spend another few years getting too comfortable in the relationship/home.

That is odd!

If you have a short flush cistern, the environmental impact is minimal, but you don't have to live in a home with bowls of piss and shit in it.

Same.

I will quite happily pay around 60p a day to guarantee I won't be confronted by the sight and smell of stale piss whenever I use the toilet. Thrift is one thing, stale piss is quite another.

Next he'll be turning condoms inside out for a second use.

I couldn't live with this sort of anality. It's a form of control.

My eldest son lives alone and rarely flushes but he does have documented mh issues (i do make sure it's done when i visit. It's gross.

Don't you have a dual flush loo, where you can do a short flush? I use that all the time.

Personally I’d find other ways to help the environment, rather than toilets full of piss or shit in my house.

Same. There are plenty of other ways to save £18 a month that don’t involve being confronted by stale, stinking pee every time I go to the toilet 🤢.
Im also interested as to how you didn’t notice these habits before you moved in OP?

I wouldn't live like that. I can limit my oven usage to some degree, but I must be able to flush freely, as and when needed.

Grim. Really grim.

Move out, OP and do not have children with this man.

A number 4 you say?

I have known a few people like that and it seemed to me that they were elderly and had been through hard times.

If you wanted to, you could calculate the cost of leaving a modern 8W LED light bulb on for an hour, or the metred cost of 10 litres of water flushing the WC, but I fear it is engrained in their head.

Not sure why folk are making up that there’s shit left when no one has said that.
im not sure if its relevant, but ours is a house of girls and doesnt smell at all.