Aibu that having thick hair is not something for someone to be envious of!?

[thickhairproblems]

As the title says!
I have very thick hair, always have, it’s straight but has lots of kinks in so needs to be blow dried and straightened after each wash. I absolutely cannot leave to air dry as it’s a frizzy poofy mess. Even just blasting it with hair dyer it’s frizzy, lots of kinks and a few waves. Needs to be brushed as I dry it to somehow calm it down and it takes absolutely ages to do! It’s about bra strap length, I’ve tried it shorter but doesn’t sit right, needs some weight to hold it down so doesn’t poof out, layers don’t sit right. First bit of wind outside and it turns to a mess, gets very knotty.

Today Someone asked if my hair was all mine and that they would love to have hair like mine. This isn’t the first conversation I’ve had with people about wanting thick hair. Every hairdresser I go to mentions it.

Aibu that having thick hair isn’t something to be envious of
or
yanbu thick hair is a pita!

Also if anyone has any styling tips that would be great

I thought the same as you until my hair started thinning in my 40s. I never realised the reason older women probably favoured short hair was because the end of their hair turned wispy and thin.

Btw I used to fight my hair but on the days it worked it was more likely because I left it to be itself (with the help of oils!) , my hair would be huge but sooo healthy looking!!

As a woman with (very) fine hair since childhood, I'd love to experience thick hair. Cannot imagine that the plus points wouldn't outweigh the "cons"!!
But I don't envy people, it must be an age thing.

I had incredibly thick hair, that sounds very much like yours, @thickhairproblems . As I reached late middle age, I comforted myself with the thought that at least I wouldn't be one of those thin haired old ladies.

Unfortunately, I should have been careful what I wished for when I was younger. I've been losing hair by the brush full for the last few years (since I was about 65) and by this time next year, if not earlier, my scalp will be showing. I hate it.

In fairness, I’m sure I have same amount of hair as pre menopause, it’s just it migrated from my head and brows to my nose and ears 🤷‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️

seriously, I have very thin male patterned balding hair now. Used to have fine but dense head of hair. I think it is no where the same as issues with unmanageable thick hair - even some men struggle with balding. For women to loose our hair is devastating and embarrassing. jeez they shaved women’s heads as punishment Society doesn’t accept thinning bald women easily. Some women with beautiful shaped heads get away with it full bald look and look stunning. Rest resort to wigs, hair pieces etc. I think we’d be shocked at how many women are wearing hair pieces and wigs . It’s a taboo

I grew up with extremely thick hair, it looked ridiculous short and when it was longer, wearing it in a bun or plait gave me a headache from the weight of it all.

Now in my 60s, post menopause, at least 3/4th of it has fallen out and my hair is fairly thin. I wish I had my thick hair back. It seems I am not alone in this, so you have that to look forward to!

It is nice to be able to blow dry it in less than 45 mins...

I haven’t voted, as thick hair can always be thinned, unlike thin hair that can’t be thickened.
So you’re lucky in that sense.

However, I have a couple of friends who have unruly thick hair and it is a constant challenge.
I remember as teens they had an awful time with it.

Its not so bad if you have the money and time to get it professionally done but not everyone has that.

I used to have very thick hair but it was very manageable.
It was amazing as I could do any hairstyle and it would look amazing.
I used to go to student hairdressers regularly, as it wouldn’t matter if they messed up as it would just grow again so quickly.
Now it’s getting thinner and I hate it.

Thick hair is great…if it’s manageable thick.
There are certain types of thick hair that are very difficult to manage.

Being someone whose scalp shines through my fine thin hair, I adore the look of thick hair....and truly envious!

Learn to appreciate it because when menopause comes round you lose it all and then wish you’d not moaned about it so much 😂 I used to be soo rough with my thick hair as it drive me nuts and 10 years on having lost 95% of it I cherish every strand and am soo gentle brushing it now 🤣

I'm 55 and have to have mine thinned out at the hairdressers with each cut every 6 weeks. But my Dad had a very thick head of hair even into his 80s and I'm praying I got those genes rather than my poor Mum's super fine wisp!

I have thick course wavy greying hair. If I wash it daily using the wrong types of products and no styling, it can be wild. I wash it 3x a week and have finally nailed my hair drying technique and use moisturising products to have the perfect shiny, swishy blowdry.

At least thick hair can be thinned. If you've got thin hair you're stuck with it.

I have very thick hair (hairdressers always comment on it) and I love it!

I have thick hair and voted yabu. Yes it can be annoying for the reasons you've stated, but it's beautiful. I love my hair.

Hate mine op loads of it. Hard to manage. Hairdresser thins it out. Would love thin hair at least you can manage it!

Same!

I do know where you’re coming from. I have Middle Eastern very very thick hair, it’s extremely course and frizzy, parts of it are extremely curly and right from the root too and parts are not curly but a frizzy mess. I’ve tried the whole curly hair routine thing, it doesn’t work for me. I have to blow dry it straight and then style it, which takes a long time. I can’t scrape it back because my baby hairs are sooo bad throughout my head it’s impossible without using a whole can of whatever product it is and it still looks messy. If I blow dry it and add waves then it actually looks nice and I get a lot of compliments, but it is so high maintenance. I have come across so many hair dressers that have not had the skills to style it and I’ve come out looking horrendous.
My tip is that I carry a subtle looking shower cap around with me when the weather is unpredictable, I put it on under a hooded jacket and it protects all the effort that I’ve put into it!
But at the end of the day, having fine hair is probably worse if it doesn’t hold a curl and goes flat. I’ve got used to my hair now and even though it’s a nightmare it’s just how it is.

It's a PITA but if you tame it with keratin treatments then it's much nicer than thin hair.

I have very fine hair that also cannot be left as it turns into a frizzy, poofy mess! I don’t want super thick hair, just about double what I have would be nice!
On the plus side, it doesn’t take long to wash, dry or style. On the negative side, I can’t wear it straight or in a ponytail as it’s too fine. I have to curl it and wear up in a clip.

It's both a blessing and a curse. A v. dear friend has really fine hair so I feel terrible complaining about my hair, but it's a nightmare to look after.

Always had really thick hair that is hard to manage, so had keratin treatments and learnt to blow dry it straight.

Went through a premature menopause and it didn't thin, even though many said it would. Got cancer, had chemotherapy and decided not to cold cap. By day three of my hair falling out (at this point, I had three carrier bags full of hair, my aforementioned friend told me I had more hair in the bags than she has on her head. By day six, I had went to get my hair shaved off. It took an hour. Always thought I had a huge head but no, it was all hair.

Was told by pretty much everyone that being post-menopause plus having chemo meant my hair it wouldn't grow back as thickly, and to prepare for much finer hair. Well, no-one told my hair that. Also discovered I have a double crown. Hair has now all grown back and ha bloody ha, it's even thicker now. My eyebrows on the other hand, are still MIA. I no longer have the energy to straighten to my hair so it's mostly tied up in a top knot. It is also growing horizontally, so cannot even wear it down.

But, I know I come from a privileged position to complain about having thick hair. And I say this as someone who has had no hair, and almost two years of seriously shit hair while it all regrew.

I hear you ! My hair is a crows nest. It needs cut every 4 weeeks or it grows outwtards. Either has to be pixie short or collar bone long or it wins sit. Humidity ruins it. Hardly any shampoo works as it gets build up. Too little product and it goes mad . Too much it goes greasy.

I am the same - fine hair but lots of it! I am finding it thining due to menopause though.....

I can imagine having very thick can be a right PITA to manage day to day. DD (now 21) had very thick wavy hair as a child and it was a nightmare to deal with.

I’m a chemo patient and my hair has started to grow back. Pre chemo it was quite thin but I had alot of hair. Now, it’s well, how can I describe it, like an electrocuted hedgehog! 🙈 Wispy, grey, sticky out bits everywhere. Can we swap hair please? 🙏

I have thick hair but with straighteners it’s fairly easy to manage. I spend a lot on getting it cut too.

I have really thick naturally coarse hair that (like lots of others on here) is actually curly hair that I wasn’t managing properly.

Now I have long layers cut in, wash with conditioner but no shampoo, then use curl cream and air dry. It’s in great condition and still thick - almost out to my shoulders.

I’m very aware of how many women lose their hair at my post-menopausal age, so I’m trying to embrace it and love it as it is.

I have and have always had thick hair. For years I struggled to tame it, straighten it and stop if frizzing. Turns out my hair is naturally curly. Once I embraced that I love my thick hair.

As for envy I would far rather have thick hair than thin hair every day of the week. I know sometimes we want what we don't have but with thick hair you have options with what to do and you don't get that with thin hair. The only thing I would prefer to have that I would need thin hair for is for my hair to air dry faster.