To think she could help just this once?

[OhDearWhatDoWeHaveHere]

I feel like I’m going mad because in my head this is what friends do, but she’s acting like I’ve asked for something outrageous.

I’m going on holiday next month for 10 days. It’s been booked for ages and I really need it. The issue is my cat. She’s quite anxious and doesn’t do well with catteries, last time she barely ate and lost weight, so I don’t want to put her through that again.

I asked a close friend if she could stay at mine while I’m away to look after her. She doesn’t have kids, works from home most of the time, and only lives about 15 minutes away, so it didn’t seem like a huge ask to me.

She said she could pop in once a day to feed her but didn’t want to stay over. I said that wouldn’t really work because the cat needs company and also I’d prefer someone actually in the house for security. It’s not the best area and I’d worry the whole time otherwise.

She still said no and suggested I try a professional sitter, but they’re expensive and it just feels a bit impersonal having a stranger in my house.

I did point out that I’ve helped her before, given her lifts, been there for her when she’s had issues with her ex etc. Not in a tit for tat way, just that I thought we had that kind of friendship where you help each other out.

She’s now gone a bit distant and said she feels “put on the spot” and “guilted”, which wasn’t my intention at all.

I just don’t really get why staying in a nicer house than hers for a week and a half (no offence to her!) and hanging out with a fairly low maintenance cat is such a big deal.

AIBU to think she’s being a bit selfish ?

I saved up for a long time like anybody else for the holiday.

Absolutely a reverse

I said that wouldn’t really work because the cat needs company and also I’d prefer someone actually in the house for security. It’s not the best area and I’d worry the whole time otherwise.

So you want your friend to stay in your house alone for 10 days when you live in a dodgy area???

WTF!

And why on earth have you left it till so close to the holiday to sort out the cat issue??

YABVVU and bit of a twerp frankly.

Surely you should have arranged someone to look after your cat BEFORE you booked your holiday?

Pay a cat sitter! She may be equally worried about the security of her home if she stays at yours! You need to start factoring in the cost of the cat sitter when you’re budgeting for holidays.

Then perhaps you shouldn't be going away on holiday? Or go for 5 days and pay a cat sitter. Learn to cut your cloth like any functioning adult.

OP you are outrageous to be so blasé about this ask because ‘you’ve given her lifts and been there for her’ in the past.

Youre asking her to move out of her home and be away from her partner for 10 days as you’re too cheap to pay a sitter.

I cannot actually believe this is real

There’s a reason why pet sitters charge a fortune for this. Because it’s really disruptive and a huge ask!

Then as I already said, your savings should have also covered the cat sitter. Even if your friend had offered, it's usually best to have a plan if that didn't happen (like now). Better get a credit card and pay using that then.

Yabvu

You asked, she doesn't want to do it

You now need to factor appropriate pet care, to suit your cats needs into your holiday costs. If that is a couple of hundred pounds for a professional house sitter, than so be it.

it’s unusual for posters to be the CF. Nobody wants to live in their mate’s house for 10 days!

Saved up for a long time but left the cat problem till the last month?

Didn't you consider the cat when you decided to go, before you booked?

£50?! For the whole time? Try £50 a night!

YABVU and a piss taker!

So who would stay in her house for security?😁

I think her popping in for a bit everyday will be fine, your cat will be in familiar surroundings so although they might hide when she comes, and perhaps not eat for a day or two because they are perverse little buggers, your cat will be fine.

If she could stay for half an hour to get your cat used to her, maybe even play or stroke for a while, then that would be great, but as long as your cat has fresh food, water and a clean litter tray they will be ok.

I always love these threads where literally everyone agrees that the OP is being totally unreasonable, but the OP keeps on plugging away anyway.

AIBU is truly a rhetorical question

Absolutely ridiculous

Beyond unreasonable

You’ve asked, she has said no. You need to find an alternative solution.

Paying for your pets to be taken care of is part of the cost of a holiday. You should have made arrangements and factored that cost in before booking it.

You sound really entitled.

Christ I feel bad enough just asking a friend to pop in once a day to feed my cat while I’m away. I wouldn’t dream of asking her to stay in my house! You are being crazy unreasonable. The cat will be fine with someone popping in either you accept that or pay a pet sitter.

This is one of the most unreasonable things I’ve ever read

total cheeky fuckery

Think you’ve got your answer OP. 99% think YABU including myself. Can’t add anything that hasn’t already been said.

step too far, OP. Nice try though. Reported.
Have people literally got nothing better to do either their time? How utterly weird.

I will ask if she can do 6 days and I will pay for a cattery for the other 4 as I have found a nice looking one with good reviews for £17 a day. If that’s also a no, I will just buy an automatic feeder.

Should've saved a bit longer so you could afford to get a cat sitter.

So, how much is your entirely unnecessary holiday?

You're expecting her to work - because it is a job - for 240 hours at less than 21p an hour.

Pony up for £12 a day for two visits or cancel the holiday, as you can't afford it.

Unless its a reverse 🙄

Which is so frustrating and pointless...there is no need at all to post from a different point of view as people are happy to give honest opinions regardless of the point of view a post is posted from