Incident at school - come and give me your thoughts.

[Newnamez]

DD is 12 and in yr7 (first yr of secondary).
On the last day of term before Easter she came home and told us that during the first lesson that day 2 'older girls' (she thinks yr9) came to the class (which had a stand in teacher that day) and asked for her by name and said she was needed at the school office by the Head teacher. She went with them. The girls walked ahead of her whispering.
By chance a TA that DD likes and chats to came out of a room and saw the three of them and asked the girls where they were taking DD. The older girls said 'the office' and the TA said i'll take over and they ran away. The TA shared with DD that one of the girls is her (TAs) cousin and said she was a ''little shit'' !! TA took DD to the office and no one had sent for her. TA took DD back to class. That's the bare bones of it. That is literally all i know.

Now, i hear about this at 6 that evening from DD and get more horrified the more i think about it. I emailed a head of year level teacher that evening. I heard nothing all easter holiday which is fine, but i heard nothing from anyone last night either. (yesterday 1st day back)

Ive told DD not to leave class unless an adult has come for her from now on.

Im going to ring the school this morning to ask to speak to someone in person about this.

Am i wrong or is this quite worrying?! How did the girls know my DD s name and where she'd be? Where were they taking her? Why were they wandering round the school? How are they going to stop this happening again?

What would you do/say?

TIA

@Newnamez I don’t mean to say anything offensive here, but does your DD have an obvious SEN and they targeted her because she’s easy pickings?

If she’s vulnerable, easily led, this is even more concerning as to what they planned to do with her.

The whole situation is ‘off’, you need to get to the bottom of it.

I would have expected the TA to have reported the incident at the time, so they should be fully aware of this even before you contacted them. You shouldn’t have to rely on your child to tell you.

Agree with PPs re. pursuing this. If they don't respond in an acceptable manner today, I would email the school governors. I don't think Easter is an excuse for something like this not to have been picked up tbh - my DDs teachers routinely action and respond to HR type issues out of hours.

My mind always goes to worst case scenarios, but I would not be happy.

I would equally be absolutely furious that the teacher - even if it was a stand-in - allowed her to go. As an adult, that should have sent alarm bells ringing and it's poor judgment at best from the stand-in.

You definitely need to meet with the school and get them to take this seriously. The fact they were wandering around the school, and were able to go into another class and ask for your daughter by name and take her out of the class is worrying - and worrying enough for a TA to have alarm bells and intervene. She shouldn't have used the language she did but in the moment she acted on instinct and I wouldn't be focusing on what she said at all - except insofar as I'm guessing the fact she's a little shit caused the alarm bells in the first place.

Speak in person where possible and follow up by email, don't do everything by email as people procrastinate over it.

Agree with PP that all teachers should be told that children aren't released from the classroom on any child's say so.

I agree. I expect she was really angry at her cousin. It's a good job she was there. Definitely follow it up but don't get the TA into trouble, in fact, thank her.

If it's normal practice in the school to send students on errands like this it needs to stop.

I am a teacher and usually would be the first to say if a parent is overreacting over something small but you are definitely not overreacting here. I would be concerned about this and absolutely would be requesting to speak to the year head. If you're not satisfied with how that goes, go to the principal. As a pp said these older girls obviously had a plan to take your daughter somewhere and I doubt their intentions were good.

Personally I wouldn't mention the "little shit" comment. Yes it was very unprofessional but this TA has saved your daughter from what was at best going to be an unpleasant and at worst dangerous situation, I wouldn't want her to get in trouble. Stick with your line about "behaviour issues" or say that the TA called her a "troublemaker" or something similar that conveys the message but won't get TA into trouble. That's just my two cents. Best of luck and I hope the school will take this seriously.

I disagree. The TA should have informed SLT that this happened. She has a duty of care to all children whilst working at the school. She needs to be held accountable if she didn’t report it.

Give them a minute, there's no suggestion that she didn't report it.

I advised mentioning the “little shit” comment not to criticise the TA for her choice of language, but because it conveys the seriousness of the TAs concerns. She was obviously alerted to something. It’s relevant.

I'm just going to echo pp here - the Supply Teacher should not have allowed your daughter out of the classroom. Why were the other girls out of their lesson? Something has gone very wrong with safeguarding, and needs to be investigated.
I hope that you get a meeting with the HOY and an investigation is happening.

Well OP will find out soon enough.

Don't do this

I wonder why the year 9 girls were wandering around during lesson time. I don't recall kids having free periods in year 9.

I'd also want to know who the cover teacher was, and why they let your daughter go off with 2 random pupils. At my kids' school, the cover teachers were regular staff, who covered lessons and did various admin tasks. They'd have known the school rules.

The school will be aware of the issues with these pupils

I disagree. OP should stick to the facts as she knows them.

Kids can be so scary. My heart dropped when I read that they ran off.

I think I'd paraphrase the TA because frankly if it's a shit HoY or Headteacher they might zero in on her bad language as a main concern and sidestep the rest but otherwise report as you were told.

Thank you so much everyone ! I'm reading and taking notes to take with me.

So i rang reception. I had to give a brief outline of what i was ringing about obvs. Receptionist listened and then said i should just email DDs form teacher and ask for a meeting if that's what i wanted. I said is that the best person? Should it not be head of year? And she said email head of year then. I said thanks. That was that.

Head of year is who i've emailed already .... but not directly asking for a meeting. I guess i'll email now and ask directly.

Yanbu.
That is very sinister.
Great the TA was a witness.
I would take it very very seriously and I would expect the school to do so too.

I wouldn't let it go.

Yes stick to the facts but that one comment doesn't need mentioning. This TA sounds like the only decent person I the school getting them in trouble will not help the situation

Shame on all those people suggested dropping the TA in it.
It sounds like she’s pretty young and already has a good relationship with your daughter - she is the one who stopped your daughter getting into any trouble

Also, I don’t know about your school, but I’ve worked in schools where there are children wondering about ooc with no particular reason.

Not necessarily - especially since they were allowed to wander around. OP should assume nothing and just give them the facts.

yes - that's another reason i didn't mention the 'shits'. I didn't want to muddy the waters so to speak.

To answer a couple of questions:

DD doesn't know the girls at all.
DD has no SEN. No bullying (so far)

I've just seen your update, OP. Ask for a meeting with the HOY, you're correct, but I would also request the Safeguarding Lead be part of the meeting. That person needs to investigate what's gone wrong.

Honestly, I think that's really poor.

Email the head of year, copying the teacher again, and give them until the end of the day to respond. If they don't email the governors. This is serious and should have been picked up sooner and telling you just to keep emailing really isn't acceptable.

My DD is the same age and I would very much have the same concerns as you

Theres a lot of different issues here - yr 9 kids wandering the corridors when they should be in class, your DD being allowed out of class with other children on their day so. And ultimately them running off

Please do push this issue. If it was me, I would be at the school now demanding to speak to the HOY or principal immediately. After all - it’s potentially a huge safeguarding risk of your own child.

I agree. This isn't for the Form Tutor at all.