Trans nursery workers?

[ThatWaryGreenBiscuit]

Am I being unreasonable to feel increasingly uncomfortable with my child’s nursery?

A couple of weeks ago they shared a post on the parents app about two people with feminine names completing some training. One of the people pictured was clearly male. I found them on instagram and they are a trans woman. Now this person did not work at my child’s actual nursery, just one of the other settings in the franchise, although they do occasionally switch the staff around, it’s not often. So I thought, I don’t like it, but ultimately moving my child because of somebody working at a different setting is unreasonable. Also it took my child a while to be comfortable and now they really enjoy it. (3y and verbal which also makes a difference too)

Then last week there’s a post about our nursery setting and a reshuffle of staff. Now working at our nursery is another trans person. A female this time who identifies as male. I confirmed them as trans through their instagram again, which honestly contains a lot of potentially worrying stuff. Very heavy on the transition side, art about top surgery, testosterone, nude art, “protecting trans youth” and protests.

Both individuals are young and I haven’t met either, however apparently my child knows the trans man (female).

I’m really not sure what to do if anything? Obviously I have no right to tell them who to hire, and I have no wish to be cruel to these young people.

But I cannot deny the feeling I have in my gut. I feel like my boundaries are being pushed and I’m worried about what their potential motives are for suddenly hiring two trans people and posting about them on the parenting portals/social media in increasing frequency.

There has been a change in management, but I have no idea who is in charge of hiring.

Will it matter as they are young? (The children) Because the trans individual at my child’s actual nursery is female would you be worried? I feel so unsure. It’s very recent so I’m weighing my options.

I will likely only openly share my thoughts on this if I decide to remove my child, as I believe that saying anything will not result in anything positive, and in fact could mean my child is “educated” because of their “horrible bigoted family”.

Agreed

They have the right to work in a childcare settings, the same as men, same as women. Presuming they are suitably qualified with no offences precluding them from working with children.

Removal of this right from trans women as desired by many posters on this thread, based purely on their gender identity, WOULD be oppression.

Oppression - often involves social, institutional, or political structures that restrict the opportunities of marginalized groups while favoring dominant ones.

Wearing of clothing alone implies nothing of the sort. That's your assumption, conflating gender identity and presentation with percieved biological sex.

There is no such thing as clothing for your sex - clothing is gendered. Gender is a social construct - it is an identity seperate from sex, which CAN be changed, whilst ones fundamental biological sex cannot, even with medical transitions.

Wearing of clothing perceived to be for a specific gender other than your own, does NOT mean the wearer is obviously pretending to be another sex, and anyone who infers this is quite clearly rather confused.

The nursery is a bit stuck then aren’t they. Forced to recruit trans candidates knowing it might put off ‘bigoted’ parents.

They're not "forced" to recruit anyone. They are required to appoint suitable candidates to the role, and judge the suitability of each based on the requirements of the role.

The sex, gender, religion, race, disability, marital status, sexuality etc of the individual has no bearing on their suitability, and to consider those factors for ANY candidate would be discrimination.

Are you actually defending discrimination?

No one is removing the right of men to work in a childcare setting. Thus, trans women are not oppressed. There are no ‘trans women’, there are only men and women. Neither of those have had the right to work in a childcare setting removed.

If it would be discrimination for the nursery to recruit based on whether someone was promoting a harmful ideology to vulnerable young people then they are in a way ‘forced’ into recruiting.

Parents aren’t forced to use the nursery and can vote with their feet. It’s puts the nursery in a tricky position.

Many posters on here clearly believe that men and trans women should not be working in nursery settings.

Trans woman is a gender identity, a social construct. Society and the law recognise this, you can personally disagree and deny their existence, it doesn't make it fact.

You do understand that people can be more than one thing you know? Your sex can be that of a biological man with a different gender identity. Do you even understand the difference?

for someone who is apparently not a trans rights activists, you’re certainly very keen on defending every part of the ideology.

i used to think like you. I listened to trans people and feminists and realised that none of it made any sense.

i am concerned with the risks (the ideology and potential of of a man who MAY have a fetish working with my child) it may pose to my child, if I think they are more than the benefit of the nursery I will remove them. I would not ban them from working in the nursery, I have no right. But I do have the right to protect my child as I see fit.

Also what is your definition of gender?

By that token, anyone who has ANY different belief or characteristic to others could be claimed to be promoting harmful beliefs.

In a professional context, it is not appropriate for any practitioner to be actively promoting their own beliefs as absolute to anyone, least of all impressionable children.
BUT they DO have the right to hold them and not have to deny or hide their existence and to be free from prejudice or discrimination.

E.g. Someone in a same sex marriage is legally entitled to be, they would be allowed to wear a wedding ring to work if those in heterosexual marriages were allowed to. A woman referring to a wife rather than a husband would be acceptable. Would you consider that to be "promoting" harmful beliefs to those who dont agree with same sex relationships?

And if so, why is would it be different to anyone assuming a different gender identity?

Gender identity isn’t even a thing. Happy to help.

Heterosexuality harmed no one. Pretending to a 3 year old boy that they could become a girl when they clearly cannot is harming that 3 year old child.

I totally respect your right to protect your child from harm, what I challenge are your assumptions

1. that a trans woman is simply a man with a sexual fetish
2. that those with a different ideology to you in relation to sex and gender is automatically "harmful"
3. That anyone who supports this ideology will be forcing it onto young children and encouraging them to adopt their beliefs

Ask yourself would you feel this way about a Muslim or Christian nursery worker? Or a gay or lesbian worker?

Many people find these ideologies to be harmful, but wouldn't feel uncomfortable about their child being cared for by them, because they know that rules and regulations exist around conduct and curriculum in these settings, that all staff are mandated to follow regardless of their own personal beliefs or characteristics.

Why do you'll feel so strongly that this risk exists just from a trans person rather than from any other workers who may differ from your ideologies in other areas?

Thankfully the law disagees with your ignorance - specifically the Gender Recognition and Equality Act.

Of course - no heterosexual male has ever harmed a woman or child!
🙄

Their ideology doesn’t harm children. The trans ideology does, by pretending things are possible when they aren’t. Look at the distressed boys being (rightly) kicked out of brownies. They never belonged there in the first place. If only they weren’t led to think otherwise by irresponsible adults.

By that logic, Christians are unsafe nursery staff too.

The Christian faith has harmed innumerable children. It pretends things are real which don't exist and that impossible things happened.

Many Christians wear crucifix jewellery, might say grace before eating, and might use language like "God bless you" when a child sneezes.

Clearly this means they are trying to indoctrinate children into their harmful ideology and that sensible parents should remove their children from nurseries which employ Christian staff.

See also: Muslims who wear hijab or thobe.

The above is just as ridiculous as saying that trans nursery staff are dangerous because they'll push an ideology on children.

As long as someone is capable of doing the job and is professional, it doesn't matter what their gender ID, sexuality, religion, political opinion, or anything else is.

In what way is believing in god harming children?

You'd have to ask the many hundreds of children subjected to sexual abuse at the hands of the church.

You'd have to ask the many hundreds of children who were beaten because they "sinned".

You'd have to ask the many children who were taken from their mothers into forced adoptions because they were born out of wedlock, which is "sinful".

Need I go on?

The Christian staff would only be a concern if they were forcing the children to accept something was true that the child didnt believe in. If that was happening eg children being forced to say grace before meals, I am sure parents would be in uproar.

With trans people, they are forcing the child to deny what the child sees before them ie a man pretending to be a woman. Children can tell what people are male and female and will know its a man. However they will be told and will be forced to say its a woman and use female pronouns. That is harmful and confusing for a young child.

OP I would be removing the child as I wouldnt want my child to be forced to believe that woman is a man.

I have never met a trans person for whom being trans wasn't their whole identify and was talked about all the time.

The thing that has harmed these children isn’t the belief in god but the actions of those in the church. Introducing children to the idea that sex can be changed is in itself harmful. Most parents can appreciate that.

Like when men accessing female spaces and sports restrict the opportunities of women? I do so agree. So therefore males with a trans identity are oppressors. I think the subject of trans nursery workers is tricky, When children are expected to call someone if the opposite sex by names and titles of the one they are “identifying with” surely that would be confusing for the children, but also trans people should have the right to do any job they are qualified for.

OK, taking you at face value, you are seriously saying that you have never experienced arousal wearing lingerie or a sexy outfit?!!

Not from the act of wearing the clothes - no 🤷‍♀️. Why are you finding that hard to accept?

The very first sentence of that post was:
Noone should be aroused or wearing any clothing they feel aroused in - whether working with children or in any job!

Right. So as trans identifying men frequently report (and demonstrate) arousal simply from the act of wearing women’s clothes, they should not be permitted to wear those clothes in a childcare setting (or school). Good, that’s a start. I’m glad you think that is unacceptable behaviour.

Sadly that is not currently banned so children are subjected to men wearing women’s clothes who may well be getting off on the whole experience.

If a Christian turned up wearing a robe and sandals carrying 5 fish and a loaf of bread, claiming to be Jesus and we should all call them Jesus and treat them like the Son of God and the Holy Spirit, then no, I dont believe they should be working in a nursery with children.

You are conflating trans women with transvestites. They are not the same.
Where are these reports you refer to?

And you have completely misinterpreted my sentence- i said i have experienced arousal wearing certain clothes, this doesn't mean it was because of the clothes themselves. 🙄