Trans nursery workers?

[ThatWaryGreenBiscuit]

Am I being unreasonable to feel increasingly uncomfortable with my child’s nursery?

A couple of weeks ago they shared a post on the parents app about two people with feminine names completing some training. One of the people pictured was clearly male. I found them on instagram and they are a trans woman. Now this person did not work at my child’s actual nursery, just one of the other settings in the franchise, although they do occasionally switch the staff around, it’s not often. So I thought, I don’t like it, but ultimately moving my child because of somebody working at a different setting is unreasonable. Also it took my child a while to be comfortable and now they really enjoy it. (3y and verbal which also makes a difference too)

Then last week there’s a post about our nursery setting and a reshuffle of staff. Now working at our nursery is another trans person. A female this time who identifies as male. I confirmed them as trans through their instagram again, which honestly contains a lot of potentially worrying stuff. Very heavy on the transition side, art about top surgery, testosterone, nude art, “protecting trans youth” and protests.

Both individuals are young and I haven’t met either, however apparently my child knows the trans man (female).

I’m really not sure what to do if anything? Obviously I have no right to tell them who to hire, and I have no wish to be cruel to these young people.

But I cannot deny the feeling I have in my gut. I feel like my boundaries are being pushed and I’m worried about what their potential motives are for suddenly hiring two trans people and posting about them on the parenting portals/social media in increasing frequency.

There has been a change in management, but I have no idea who is in charge of hiring.

Will it matter as they are young? (The children) Because the trans individual at my child’s actual nursery is female would you be worried? I feel so unsure. It’s very recent so I’m weighing my options.

I will likely only openly share my thoughts on this if I decide to remove my child, as I believe that saying anything will not result in anything positive, and in fact could mean my child is “educated” because of their “horrible bigoted family”.

If it wasn't as simple as male and female then the term "intersex" would make no sense.

And, if we're going to get medical about it, the current term is "differences in sexual development " not intersex. And it's nothing to do with the concept of trans.

Frankly though, I'd be concerned about ANY man who wanted to look after small children

why?

Same op I would be very uncomfortable with it.

Yes. I don't think its feasible or even desirable to shield children from the reality that some adults believe they are the opposite sex. I think its better approached as just a part of life, like how some people have different religious beliefs, and discussed with them, giving your perspective, as you would with anything else.

Even if your assumption that trans individuals are automatically mentally ill were true, are you suggesting that people with mental health issues should never work with children? What jobs should the 1 in 4 people with a mental health condition be allowed to do? I'll bet a good 20-30% of nursery workers and teachers have some form of mental health condition, ditto doctors and nurses. Probably even higher numbers given the stress of the work.

I do have some empathy for the OP, even though it wouldn't bother me, but this thread has opened up so many regressive attitudes.

But trans isn’t sold as a belief system. The rules are that it’s a fact, and no one is allowed question otherwise. It’s way beyond the comprehension a toddler should have ti wrap their head around.

… so if nfollow your thinking all the women who were first in their field should not have bothered but stayed at home for a “ quiet life “ all the black people who broke barriers were a bit odd and should have chosen a different career so as not to rock the boat ? V strange thinking you have going on

are you seriously suggesting they have studied and spent time training just to be a bit controversial in their career ? And they should have change careers? How odd

All of this

CanadaNotAMum: OP has no way of knowing if these nursery workers are actually trans
LOL. Tell me you haven't read the OP without actually telling me you haven't read the OP.
Did a Bat Signal go off?

Statistics and facts.

You must live in a bubble if you don't know the answer to your own question

Well unfortunately they may have to because trans people are not going to disappear (which makes me sound a bit TRA-y but I say this as a statement of fact rather than one of defiance!) so I do think it's useful to have a plan to explain in an age appropriate way that some ladies, like Alex at nursery, like us to act like they are men. TI is only sold as fact by those who believe in it. If you don't then you are fully at liberty to explain it to your child as a belief system. Just as some people teach their religion as though its fact, non believers explain it as 'some people believe...'

Transvestism and people transitioning gender are two different things

so there are “right clothes” for your sex in your view?

I'm asking these questions as I’m always puzzled by the view “there is no such thing as gender and I’m gender critical” held at the same
time as “that person is wearing the wrong
clothes for their gender/sex”

I would like to understand

Craig baxter the trans nursery teacher, need I say more...

https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&opi=89978449&url=www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/scottish-news/drag-queen-nursery-teacher-snared-36200591&ved=2ahUKEwimq6qjweuTAxX4QUEAHWYABNkQFnoECCsQAQ&usg=AOvVaw3rlNSDfVfiiDm05WXfdRqs

There is absolutely nothing wrong with a trans person working at a nursery.

If they over share their personal life then that is not on, but that applies to anyone.

As long as they're professional, there is no problem.

I'm horrified by the bigotry and unfounded fear mongering being shared on this post. I have deliberately avoided posts regarding trans issues for this reason, but I just couldn't ignore this one.

To ensure a child is safe in any education setting, I would above all else want to ensure that they complied with the law!
In particular:

• That all staff were DBS checked and suitably qualified and received relevant and updated training regularly.
• That all ratios and 1 to 1 policies were compliant.
• That all safeguarding polices and procedures and intimate care policies were in place, effective and regularly reviewed.
• That the setting adheres to the equality act for ALL and treats everyone with respect.
• That they have clear codes of conduct for staff, parents and children.
• That their curriculum teaches children that people have the right to hold all sorts of beliefs, even if we don't agree, and someone's belief doesnt mean we dont treat them any more or less fairly than anyone else, and that even people we dislike or disagree with should be treated with respect and kindness.

What's in a member of staff's underpants, how they chose to present themselves, or if they identify as any particular gender would NOT be a factor in my decision making as to whether a nursery would keep my child safe!

And for everyone saying "I wouldn't want my child being told someone who was OBVIOUSLY female, was a man" clearly hasn't spent time with many 2, 3 or 4 year olds!

Have you never experienced the mortifying embarrassment of your toddler pointing at a rather rotund, clearly male chap, who happened to have "moobs" and a pony tail, and a full beard asking loudly "what that LADY doing"?

Or a preschool aged child following your clearly female teenager aound insisting she "is a boy" because she had a unisex name and a pixie cut!!

Kids of this age are not the best at identifying these things you know - They literally accept people at face value, and have very little interest in defining adults by gender - especially as nursery staff tend to go by 1st names. And names are more than ever absolutely impossible to rely on for identification of gender correctly. And equally it does not and gender should not matter to anyone. Ensuring ALL individuals are doing their job safely and professionally is the key, and trans people are no less likely to do this than cis people in the same way that poc are less likely to do so than white people!

Honestly. Please try to get things into perspective and keep an open mind. Also consider that one day, despite your own preferred (if somewhat divisive) beliefs, your own child may actually end up thinking differently to you.

I think I would take being called a bigot over putting my toddler in a known risk environment.

You are aware that the majority of trans women identifying as such in prison arent actually trans women?

They are cis men claiming to be trans women to secure imprisonment away from male prisoners,.which is much preferred by inmates, particularly those convicted of violent and sexual offences to children, due to the risk they face from fellow male inmates of rape and beatings when their conviction is revealed.

I'd be interested to see how many of these crimes were committed by offenders whilst actually living AS trans women compared to how many are then subsequently charged, sentenced and imprisoned as alleged trans women. 🤔

In that case, pushing for a definition of trans that encompasses anyone who says they are trans wasn’t a success, was it?

It's strange how all those defending male trans nursery workers have fallen silent since I posted the article of a male trans nursery worker being arrested for abuse.

It's almost like trans men and sexual abuse go hand in hand. If you believe you can change sex then you are not in the right frame of mind to be educating tiny, vulnerable children.

Of course a man pretending to be a woman and applying to work with society's most vulnerable is going to raise a few eyebrows and quite rightly so.

Anyone who uses the term "cis" is automatically erased from the contingent of people worth listening to.

You are aware that the majority of trans women identifying as such in prison arent actually trans women?

They are cis men claiming to be trans women to secure imprisonment away from male prisoners,.which is much preferred by inmates, particularly those convicted of violent and sexual offences to children, due to the risk they face from fellow male inmates of rape and beatings when their conviction is revealed.

I'd be interested to see how many of these crimes were committed by offenders whilst actually living AS trans women compared to how many are then subsequently charged, sentenced and imprisoned as alleged trans women. 🤔

Once again, PREDATORY MEN are gaming the very broken system at the expense of women and trans people!

I struggle to understand how anyone who considers themselves a feminist could believe the bullshittery that we are at risk from trans people, rather than seeing the risk is from broken systems and lack of accountability to protect against actual predators!

Lol, so how does one distinguish a cis man pretending to be a women from a cis man who genuinely is a woman @Endoadnowarrior? Trans orthodoxy states they're women if they say they are remember?

lol @Endoadnowarriorcan you tell us please how the op would know if this particular trans woman is cis claiming to be trans or actually trans?

Sometimes. Not always. And how can you tell the difference?

I’ve clearly explained that some clothing is designed with biological sex in mind. Some isn’t. I don’t care what anyone wears as long as it’s appropriate for activity or if they are getting turned on by their outfit.

what is your definition of gender?

Indeed. Is it a man pretending to be a woman or a man pretending to be a man pretending to be a woman? 😂

And ultimately, does it matter? Both are still men.