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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to feel miffed that SIL refused Easter eggs?!

260 replies

ShabbyChic999 · 11/04/2026 23:46

In the scheme of things this is not a major problem but I'm curious to know what you ladies think.....!!!
I got lovely unicorn Thorntons eggs for DH little nieces but at the last minute my in laws went away for Easter so we hadn't dropped the eggs to them. We tried to make an arrangement to drop over since they got back but when i mentioned we had eggs for the girls my SIL said to keep them ourselves and that they had enough chocolate. Again I know it's not a major deal, I just felt a bit flat as was excited to give them and see their faces. I know kids have all eaten too much chocolate at this stage but I just think now they'll think we didn't get them any egg! Curious to know if you think she's being too fussy or has a point?

OP posts:
pouletvous · 12/04/2026 08:13

Lillers · 12/04/2026 07:24

Maybe you feel her delivery was off, but I don’t think she’s wrong in principle. It’s also possible she had no idea these are special unicorn eggs and probably assumed it’s more generic Cadbury crap, in which case she’d feel it was just adding to an already existing pile of the same thing. Regardless, just take it on the chin. The kids won’t even think about it.

thorntons crap

pouletvous · 12/04/2026 08:18

My 8 year old has about 8 eggs, loads of bags of sweets and loads of those mini eggs

there is no way she can eat them all

why do people think it’s ok to buy my kid all this shit? Its not kind, its a dreadful gift .

All that sugar and processed shit chocolate drives me nuts

Roads · 12/04/2026 08:20

pouletvous · 12/04/2026 08:18

My 8 year old has about 8 eggs, loads of bags of sweets and loads of those mini eggs

there is no way she can eat them all

why do people think it’s ok to buy my kid all this shit? Its not kind, its a dreadful gift .

All that sugar and processed shit chocolate drives me nuts

Because that's what people have always done for children at Easter. If you don't want you child having it all then tell people in advance and or donate it to food banks so other children can enjoy them. It's really not difficult.

EdithBond · 12/04/2026 08:22

She’s ungracious and unreasonable to turn down a gift on her DC’s behalf.

If she thinks they’ve had too much chocolate, she could tell them they can only have a little at a time or save it for next month.

Maybe she’s worried they won’t eat it and she will!

Don’t drop them off especially but give to your nieces when you next see them.

Morepositivemum · 12/04/2026 08:24

The day after Easter Sunday there was a radio segment on what to make to get leftover chocolate out of the house and I was rolling my eyes but even listening to the presenter some people watch junk food so much that Easter and Christmas properly stressses them out!! It was rude of her and worse given how lovely the eggs sound but it was probably an irrational thing she couldn’t help.

JC89 · 12/04/2026 08:25

Mine have a large pile that they won't get through - DH and I will be eating some especially whatever is still there when the next influx if chocolate comes (Halloween being the next big one). Maybe SIL knew the kids wouldn't get through all the eggs they already had and thought you might prefer to eat them yourself rather than SIL eating them. Especially if you were making a special trip to give them!

saraclara · 12/04/2026 08:26

The time to say that you don't want your kids to have Easter eggs, is well before the event. You don't reject a gift that has already been bought with love.

I spent ages choosing eggs that I knew my granddaughters would love (to their different tastes etc) so would be very hurt if my DD had told me they weren't welcome.
Had she said beforehand that she wanted to limit their chocolate, I'd be fine about it.

GottaBeStrong · 12/04/2026 08:26

Next year donate 2 eggs to a refuge for the children there. My daughter and I fled DV a few years ago and would have really appreciated an egg for her at a time when I had no money.

I don't understand how some children seem to end up with so many eggs. My daughter got 2 this year. One from me and one from a friend.

Pancakeflipper · 12/04/2026 08:27

Rude.
They dont need to eat the eggs straight away - chocolate does keep.

.My dad used to freeze our Easter eggs (take out any treats in the middle).

saraclara · 12/04/2026 08:29

Ireallywantadoughnut36 · 12/04/2026 08:05

I sometimes do this to SiL, and I know it must feel awkward and not nice, but sometimes parents do know their children best. I always say thank you though, she should have been more polite. Number 1, my children and most children, have no clue who gives them what, so don't worry about the kids thinking badly of you. Number 2, yes in theory chocolate can be doled out slowly but - you have no clue how much they've ended up getting (I hate waste and there's always waste after easter as it doesnt really last that long before going a bit white and manky), also some children do better with that than others, I've 1 with adhd and she finds eating things slowly really hard. If you threw her a new Easter egg, she'd want it right now, despite all the other open chocolates and an inevitable melt down would occur.
I often say "please don't" to certain gifts if I know it'll create waste, or inadvertently upset the kids (too much sugar, not going to be allowed it - toy weapons fall into this camp, not age appropriate etc). Maybe next year just pop her a message and ask what the kids would like. I wish SiL would do that rather than attempting to bribe the kids with stuff she knows or forgets they can't have or aren't allowed etc.
Sorry you feel hurt by it. I don't think it's personal and surely you having them is better than them going straight to the bin (the other place some things end up if parents can't use them).

Why do you not think to let your SIL know well in advance, so they she doesn't waste her money and time? It's so selfish and unkind to let her buy them and then reject them.

It's not up to her to contact you to ask. You're the one with the preference that's at odds with most people's expectations. Yet you're putting the responsibility' on her.

Claudiasfringebenefits · 12/04/2026 08:29

Your nieces won’t hold it against you. You eat them, if you don’t really want to them, then neither does she.
The moment has passed, get them to them in time next year.

SliceofTosst · 12/04/2026 08:30

Can you keep them in your cupboard and give them when they visit?

Just say they had already had a lot of chocolate for Easter so you kept them for when they'd run out?

Let you SIL know you will do this so she doesn't get shirty.

DappledThings · 12/04/2026 08:30

It was a bit blunt but sometimes you need to be to get it across. Especially with presents. People are frequently insistent that their god-given right to give a present trumps the recipient's actual wishes.

Have you bought eggs for them before? Maybe you missed a hint that SIL didn't want to get into niece and nephew egg buying so she had to be more direct.

And why are you calling them "DH's nieces"? They are as much your nieces.

Roads · 12/04/2026 08:31

Claudiasfringebenefits · 12/04/2026 08:29

Your nieces won’t hold it against you. You eat them, if you don’t really want to them, then neither does she.
The moment has passed, get them to them in time next year.

She got them in time. What part of her post makes you think she didn't? It was the in laws who changed the plan by going away.

Inthenameoflove · 12/04/2026 08:32

I must admit my heart sank when MORE chocolate was produced for my kids….so I have sympathy with your SIL.

TwitchyNibbles · 12/04/2026 08:33

I can understand her point, but there's no reason she couldn't have gratefully accepted them and just hidden them in a cupboard for a couple of weeks until the rest of the chocolate is gone!

Untailored · 12/04/2026 08:33

Surprised so many people think this is reasonable. It’s fine to limit your kids chocolate intake but unbelievably rude to refuse and dismiss a gift that someone has already bought. OP spent time and money thinking of these children because she loves them and wants to make them happy and the SIL just dismissed it. The fact it’s chocolate isn’t the point.

TwoLeftSocksWithHoles · 12/04/2026 08:37

Unicorn eggs?
Surely unicorn foals are born in a similar manner to horses (I understand that the horn, fortunately, grows later)

Pterodactyls eggs would be acceptable but not unicorns.
I may have to write to Thortons about this.

Claudiasfringebenefits · 12/04/2026 08:38

Roads · 12/04/2026 08:31

She got them in time. What part of her post makes you think she didn't? It was the in laws who changed the plan by going away.

Edited
Show quote history

I didn’t say she didn’t get them in time this year.
The SIL would have likely accepted the eggs if it was before Easter, I was just clarifying that I am not against giving eggs in future years, but once Easter over I can see why people don’t want more chocolate in the house.

Gingerwolfe · 12/04/2026 08:39

Yep SIL is being rude and precious. Can you speak to your sibling who’s married to SIL and ask if you can pop over and drop them off?

Haveyouanyjam · 12/04/2026 08:39

She should have accepted them and asked you not to buy them next year. We were with family this Easter and I specifically asked them not to buy them any chocolate as they get an egg from us and from our childminder and any more just ends up rotting in the cupboard!

My grandma was put out last year when I thanked her for the kids Easter eggs but said I wouldn’t be giving the one year old her one as she wasn’t eating chocolate at one…but I said I would give it to her when she’s older as chocolate hardly goes off!

TY78910 · 12/04/2026 08:40

Do they know it’s a lovely thorntons egg? It could be that they think you just got the regular ones and just said oh don’t worry about it they have loads of eggs…

Owly11 · 12/04/2026 08:41

I think gifts are always a lot more complicated than they seem on the surface. The gift giver gets a lot of pleasure from the act and it's not only difficult for the recipient to say no, they also have to appear pleased and grateful. In most cases therefore the gift is mainly beneficial for the giver even though that seems counterintuitive. It can also get even more complicated around children as people get huge amounts of pleasure giving gifts to kids ("was excited to see their faces"). I do think parents have earned the right to have the lions share of this pleasure since they do all the hard work too. However parents should also try to be generous about letting other family members also get that pleasure from time to time. On this occasion I think you and your sil could have come up with a compromise that worked for both of you so yes she was a little bit rude but you could also have pushed back with an alternative compromise suggestion.

Roads · 12/04/2026 08:43

Claudiasfringebenefits · 12/04/2026 08:38

I didn’t say she didn’t get them in time this year.
The SIL would have likely accepted the eggs if it was before Easter, I was just clarifying that I am not against giving eggs in future years, but once Easter over I can see why people don’t want more chocolate in the house.

Show quote history

But that's not the OPs fault. She had the eggs before easter and the SIL knows this. There's no reason to say you don't want them now easter is over except to be rude. It's not like they have to eat them as soon as they get them, chocolate keeps for months.

JaneGrint · 12/04/2026 08:47

I’m a bit torn here.

On the one hand, SIL could have accepted them gracefully and put them aside for later in the year, or asked you in advance to not buy any Easter eggs for her children.

But on the other hand… I’m sympathetic with SIL not wanting them, because we usually end up with an overwhelming amount of Easter chocolate being gifted to the DC and I’ve always been too polite to say anything about it. Maybe I should. But in advance of Easter so people don’t get offended.