AIBU / Ridiculous re putting extra mileage on my car

[MileageWoes]

DH works from home, I work full time in the office. He is having major car trouble and will be without a car for the next few weeks. Obviously he doesn't need a car for work but he has a hobby that he travels to so is using my car morning and evening to do this. It's a 40 mile round trip, twice a day so means that he's putting over 500 miles extra on my car every week! I think he should cut back to once a day until he gets his own car back and he thinks I am being very unreasonable as it will only be for 3/4 weeks.

I WILL NOT BE DISCLOSING WHAT THE HOBBY IS! (I don't want to out myself and it's really really not relevant to my question)

Not much of a partnership from his side if he's working full time & attends a hobby twice a day every day. Does he contribute to the housework, the kids, the relationship?

I've just read back all the messages (10 pages of them) & see they have kids

YABU not saying what the hobby is! There must be hundreds of thousands of MN users, how the fuck can it be outing?! And yes he’s being a complete knob.

I don't know why people dont just write fake hobbies if their Dhs hobby is sooooo unique and outing. It ends up derailing the threads trying to guess.

I'm desperate to know what it is as its ridiculous either way.

Allotment.

OP said not a horse

I think she said 500 miles a week.
Big differerence?

I think he should pay extra to cover the fuel costs. If he doesnt like it tell him to hire a car to get bsckwards and forward to his hobby.

Whatever that is.

500 miles a week not year is a lot

Cannot believe so many are focussed on what the ‘hobby’ is, & no1 with the right health & welfare of their animals, would have their horse/s that far from home.

If OP suddenly badly needed to use her own economical more convenient car, whilst H is gadding about having a high old time 20 miles away does she then have to pay for a taxi?!!

And, yes the mileage is a thing as it will have impact on her insurance.

500 miles a week, not annually!

I would be peed off with this too, my car is 6 years old and has less than 30,000 miles on it. There’s been occasions when my DH vehicle has been off the road and he’s had to use my car. I understand it needs to happen for essentials like work and visiting family but I’d have to say something about adding these extra miles for a hobby.

Sounds like you have quite separate lives, financially and socially.
If my car needed replacing it wouldn’t be up to me to pay for my car out of my own money, we would look at the family finances and pay for it. And we have adult children but I don’t think dh would choose to be away for the whole evening every single day. You seem to be two separate people

If married surely you help each other and share as you are a unit.

Deffo horses!! 🐴

I would also say not a horse if I didn’t want my DHs horse hobby known about 🤣

How much doing his share and helping each other is he doing if he's out doing a hobby for at least 20 hours a week?

Mileage indicates wear and tear on the car, especially if that mileage is added in a short space of time. Which is why people look at mileage Vs age when buying a vehicle.
If the OP nornally drives 200 miles a week, this new 500 miles a week will have a significant impact on the wear and tear on her vehicle and, therefore, it's value (for insurance payout if written off or if she chooses to sell it).
Mileage isn't just a number on the dial.

Yanbu from me - I wouldn't accept my husband having g a hobby which took him away from family life every day and basically dominated the running of the household, let alone wanting to use my car for it as well! Bugger that. What if you needed to go somewhere in the evening?

Edited as I found the answer to my question.

I'm struggling with the concept of driving 80 miles a day for the sake of a hobby, and with having so much spare time for it. OP, when if ever do you actually get to see your husband if you're working full time? And how is he affording this, especially with the current cost of petrol?

At the very least he should be reimbursing you for maintenance, insurance, depreciation and general wear and tear.

Do you think in the 2 days and 500 comments since I said this originally that no one has pointed that out.... 🤔 Or that youre the first to realise?

Thank you. I meant additional, I typed annual. I'm dyslexic and post menopausal - words get mixed.

Anyway, have a brilliant Saturday, hope its filled with sunshine.

You say you’ve asked him to temporarily only do the hobby once a day to cut down on the mileage on your car, but would he he letting anyone else down if he did that? Are there others who would be relying on him being there?

Except that it's still not 500 additional miles, is it? It's at least 2000.

No, just saw it and commented. Why not. I am sure others have commented but I thought the point needed reinforcing.