AIBU? My wife tells me to "anticipate things" and I have no idea what she means.

251 replies

otiose1001 · 02/04/2026 05:16

Husband here. My wife frequently tells me I need to "anticipate things" and act before she asks.

Honestly, I have absolutely no idea what I’m supposed to be predicting.

What is the smallest, most specific thing your husband fails to anticipate that makes you furious?

OP posts:

JHound · 06/04/2026 17:40

QuintadosMalvados · 03/04/2026 09:42

I disagree. I don't think that a man who keeps an immaculately tidy home when single is going to turn into a slob around the house when married.
To keep his place to that level of tidiness shows he values tidiness.
It's ingrained.

Usually with men who need mummying in this regard it's pretty clear that they do as their place will be a tip when you go there for the first time.

There's no turning into a slob (unless there's a crisis of sorts).

People pick badly then blame the other person when desire lessens and the rose-tinted specs come off. Which it will when habituation sets in.
And please stop with this men thing.

I know men who work really long hours when their wife doesn't work as long.
After dinner, she's more than happy to leave the dishes till the morning when she'll be doing them. In fact as he works the longer hours she sees it as fair that she does them all the time.
He is itching to get them done so he does them.

You're either tidy or you're not.

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I have seen this happen - more than once. A friend divorced her husband over this. Another acquaintance’s husband when challenged over why he stopped doing anything around the house once they married responded he “had a wife now”. They’re divorced too.

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