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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU - mini eggs and mum

287 replies

Housemovehopeful2024 · 31/03/2026 21:30

My daughter is almost 7. I am not a fan of her having mini eggs due to the risk of choking (not precious about other chocolate or sweets - it’s just the risk of choking I’m worried about). I have told my mum this but despite that and reminding her, she seems to repeatedly give them to her. One week it’ll be a chocolate yogurt with mini eggs, the next week mini egg cakes (only one egg per cake so perhaps less of an issue?) or a small egg with mini eggs in. This week, they made Easter cakes with the smarties equivalent of mini eggs (still the same size and shape). AIBU to be irked by this or am I being too precious?

YABU - stop being so pernickety
YANBU - mini eggs are a hazard and in any event she should listen to your wishes

OP posts:
Savonne · 01/04/2026 08:56

Christ. She's 7

Isittimeformynapyet · 01/04/2026 09:03

Orangy · 31/03/2026 22:30

She could blend them into a paste.

😂 love this

Kpo58 · 01/04/2026 09:04

Housemovehopeful2024 · 31/03/2026 22:24

Smarties are fine (I’m not that anxious). It was the smarties branded eggs, which are basically mini eggs by a different name.

TBH, I wouldn't allow the smarties or milky bar mini eggs as the shells on them are so hard that I have broken a tooth on them. The Cadburys ones are fine though.

GetOffTheCounter · 01/04/2026 09:05

Housemovehopeful2024 · 31/03/2026 21:45

Ah this is helpful. It looks as though I am being unreasonable. It seems most people think it’s because mini eggs should be allowed by age 7 and therefore it’s reasonable for my mum to disregard what I’ve asked?

I think you are probably too cautious regarding mini eggs but agree 100% that if you have asked your mother to not do something for any reason then she has no business ignoring your wishes.

Happyjoe · 01/04/2026 09:07

Blueshoey484 · 31/03/2026 23:24

Unlike the dig you had at me? Complete with laughter emoticons. No problem thread monitor

Oh sorry, my laughing upset you? You one of those people who dish it out and can't take it then? Riiiiight. Now I understand.

luckylavender · 01/04/2026 09:08

I think at 7 she should be fine. But you don't want her to have them and it seems like loads of junk food to me. Put your foot down.

Spiffingdarling88 · 01/04/2026 09:11

youalright · 31/03/2026 21:43

You may be unreasonable but I agree with you I'm the same with my kids I'm terrified of them choking i also only let them have lollies if they sat still to eat them. I was still cutting my kids grapes until they where in secondary school 🙈

My husband still does and one's in sixth form 😂 even though the sixth former will go in the fridge and eat them whole anyway

firstofallimadelight · 01/04/2026 09:14

GlomOfNit · 01/04/2026 08:11

But surely you can see that the overall risk of choking on any of these food items is really, really low?

I do worry a lot about the ability of people nowadays to assess relative risks rationally. We obviously focus on the horror stories and social media means these circulate like wildfire (not all of them true, either) along with 'helpful' graphics showing all the foods you must never, ever give your child. (this is just an example - I'm not sure there's an aspect of child-raising or being pregnant that isn't now over-thought and catastrophised about).

Look - life is unpredictable. You can make it a bit more predictable by curtailing perfectly normal freedoms and activities - no trampoline, no cycling, no going out alone with friends, no mini eggs - but where will you draw the line? You need to address the underlying reason for curtailing these normal things, and it isn't the fact that all of these things are out to kill your children. It's the massively risk-adverse mindset.

It’s reasonable to be cautious, as long as the op teaches her child to be careful rather than banning foods I don’t see why it would be an issue.

Rumors1 · 01/04/2026 09:17

https://www.thesun.ie/health/12369066/cadburys-mini-egg-warning-boy-choking-seconds-from-death/

It’s a sun article so you may not want to open buts it’s about a 7 year old that was
choking on a mini egg.

My DS nearly died in front of me
choking on blueberries when he was 2. I cut my kids blueberries and grapes until they were in secondary school! I have a real fear around it after that day. He was choking behind me and wasn’t making a sound.
My 18 year old was talking about getting mini eggs yesterday and I told her to be careful eating them 😊

Mum issues Cadbury's Mini Egg warning after finding her son seconds from death

A MUM has banned Cadbury Mini Eggs in her house after claiming her son turned BLUE and nearly choked to death when one became lodged down his throat. Vicky Heavey was seconds away from performing C…

https://www.thesun.ie/health/12369066/cadburys-mini-egg-warning-boy-choking-seconds-from-death/

Lmnop22 · 01/04/2026 09:20

TheDenimPoet · 31/03/2026 23:14

Other foods than mini eggs can cause choking, so why are they being singled out? Hope THAT helps.

Are you joking? They’re being singled out because they’re the subject matter of this post 😂

Hollyhobbi · 01/04/2026 09:22

AlteFrau · 01/04/2026 08:22

I have currently opted not to see my grandchildren because of the incredibly prescriptive set of rules that was being put in operation.

Things like car seats, supervision around proximity to traffic, avoiding any foods that might avoid allergic reactions are all absolutely fine. But there just needs to be a little a bit of flexibility, for grandparents who are freely giving their time to provide regular care and support.

If parents want their minute rules to be followed every minute of the day, then they should employ a nanny/find a nursery or childminder that is willing to follow their set of protocols.

Gosh what would you have made of my ex husbands parents who thought it was ok to have our two DDs in a car with no working seatbelts in the back!! They would have been aged about 2 and 7 at the time.

TheNinkyNonkyIsATardis · 01/04/2026 09:28

Two issues - the request following and the sweets themselves.

On the request, she should absolutely respect your wishes, even if she disagrees. (MIL ignored my request recently because she was soooo experienced with the asthma our son inherited from my husband - my son ended up in A&E!).

But on the subject of the actual eggs, I think that at 7 she's more than capable of being taught to eat safely, and I think it's actually a bit dangerous now to avoid things entirely. Age 7, there are lots of opportunities for her to get her hands on stuff with zero adult supervision, so IMO she'd be much better off being exposed to them sensibly.

(My son is 2.5, and although I don't give him checking hazard sweets, he's been on whole grapes and tomatoes supervised for six months, because it means he's prepared if he randomly grabs something at a party etc)

Trickedbyadoughnut · 01/04/2026 09:35

Does she override your decisions on other stuff too?

I don't think you're being particularly unreasonable about the mini eggs but that is actually irrelevant - it doesn't matter what your mother thinks about the mini eggs either, she shouldn't be ignoring what you asked her not to do.

IvyEvolveFree · 01/04/2026 09:41

It's the size of the airway that makes food like grapes etc. a choking hazard for small children. By 7 she'll have grown out of this risk.

Heynow87 · 01/04/2026 09:45

VickyEadieofThigh · 31/03/2026 22:16

I burnt my mouth quite badly on a toasted marshmallow - doesn't that concern you if you're toasting them to such a degree?

We won’t drop dead from a burnt mouth.

AutumnColour89 · 01/04/2026 09:49

As someone who choked twice as a child under 5, both times requiring visits to hospital, I agree with some PPs and don't think shielding a 7 year old from something like Mini Eggs is helpful. At 7, it would be far safer to expose her gently to foods with a higher choking risk so she learns to manage them responsibly. My past choking experiences have made me particularly anxious with my 18 month old toddler, but I'm also aware I can't cut his grapes in to slithers forever.

If you're looking purely for backing on your approach re. your mother, then no, YANBU to expect her to support you. I'd maybe talk to her, perhaps she worries about the consequences of your approach but is letting that come out in unhelpful ways.

AutumnColour89 · 01/04/2026 09:51

TheNinkyNonkyIsATardis · 01/04/2026 09:28

Two issues - the request following and the sweets themselves.

On the request, she should absolutely respect your wishes, even if she disagrees. (MIL ignored my request recently because she was soooo experienced with the asthma our son inherited from my husband - my son ended up in A&E!).

But on the subject of the actual eggs, I think that at 7 she's more than capable of being taught to eat safely, and I think it's actually a bit dangerous now to avoid things entirely. Age 7, there are lots of opportunities for her to get her hands on stuff with zero adult supervision, so IMO she'd be much better off being exposed to them sensibly.

(My son is 2.5, and although I don't give him checking hazard sweets, he's been on whole grapes and tomatoes supervised for six months, because it means he's prepared if he randomly grabs something at a party etc)

Totally agree with this.

littleorangefox · 01/04/2026 09:53

If you say no mini eggs then that should be respected. Don't be influenced by people scoffing and rolling their eyes at you. It seems to be a trend especially on mumsnet to do this to people who continue doing certain things for longer than is considered "normal" in terms of safety. And that you should be so eternally grateful for any scrap of childcare that you allow the grandparents to completely disregard any requests or instructions you may have to keep your children safe.

I have 4 children and my oldest are 6. They all still get grapes and other similar shaped foods cut into quarters. They are not allowed mini eggs and last year we requested that the school not give them popcorn due to the choking risk. I don't care what people think tbh. I would rather take precautions than end up with my children injured or dead. And no, they aren't scarred by it nor wrapped in cotton wool with the prospect of being unable to navigate the world when they are older 😂

Vroomfondleswaistcoat · 01/04/2026 10:04

Mapletree1985 · 01/04/2026 07:40

I mean, essentially any and all food is a choking hazard. Except soup, maybe.

I nearly killed myself choking on a banana when I was 14.I'd chewed it and it was all gooey, but somehow I breathed at the wrong time and it filled my throat. I remember being terrified, until someone clapped me very hard on the back and cleared my airway. And adults can die of inhaled peanuts.

Choking is always a possibility, with almost anything. To be honest, I'm even hazardous with soup...

Mrscharlieeeee · 01/04/2026 10:06

I think you’re being ridiculous, sorry. She’s 7! Completely understandable with a toddler or young child but 7? She’s your first isn’t she?

ItsAMoooPoint · 01/04/2026 10:08

My youngest once choked on a strawberry (and I do mean choked, not gagged on) so mini eggs are out in this house!

I'd be furious if someone went against my request like that. It's not a difficult rule to follow. Plenty of other treats to choose from!

Happytaytos · 01/04/2026 10:14

littleorangefox · 01/04/2026 09:53

If you say no mini eggs then that should be respected. Don't be influenced by people scoffing and rolling their eyes at you. It seems to be a trend especially on mumsnet to do this to people who continue doing certain things for longer than is considered "normal" in terms of safety. And that you should be so eternally grateful for any scrap of childcare that you allow the grandparents to completely disregard any requests or instructions you may have to keep your children safe.

I have 4 children and my oldest are 6. They all still get grapes and other similar shaped foods cut into quarters. They are not allowed mini eggs and last year we requested that the school not give them popcorn due to the choking risk. I don't care what people think tbh. I would rather take precautions than end up with my children injured or dead. And no, they aren't scarred by it nor wrapped in cotton wool with the prospect of being unable to navigate the world when they are older 😂

If your 6yo can't be trusted to bite popcorn you have a problem. Educate your children rather than wrapping them in cotton wool. Risks are tiny, and even smaller if the children are taught (when appropriate) how to chew properly.

Viclla · 01/04/2026 10:21

It doesn't matter what your mum thinks about it, you are your child's parent and if you say no mini eggs then no mini eggs.

I can't imagine deliberately going against a parent's wish like that. Who even thinks like that? I wouldn't trust her with your daughter if she can't follow very basic instructions.

BertieBotts · 01/04/2026 10:25

I am not actually being lighthearted about OCD. I am not a clinician and don't know what the tipping point is for a diagnosis, so would never suggest that somebody has it, but I do absolutely think there is a danger with internet forums and social media algorithms, especially around parenting, to tap into a thinking pattern which seems similar to what is described in OCD or reassurance-seeking anxiety, where there is almost a sort of one-upmanship around safety and making sure that you are aware of every possible danger and going to greater and greater lengths to eliminate them. The problem with these thinking patterns is that once you start it is hard to stop, it is hard to gauge what is "normal" and if you accidentally enter an arena where other people are operating in the same way then it both reinforces that your fear is logical and valid, and additionally people can end up egging each other on suggesting more and more ways to avoid or reduce risk. Or what I tend to notice with my own algorithms is that whatever thing I accidentally linger too long on (for me it tends to be house fires, car crashes and rare childhood illnesses) I will get served more and more of until I end up an anxious mess and I have to try and either re-train the algorithm to show me other things or step away from the internet altogether for a while.

Before anyone jumps on me, I do think it's helpful to have awareness of potential safety issues and absolutely to take steps to minimise risk especially where young children are concerned. But there has to be a balance between risk avoidance and risk acceptance. It is not possible to eliminate all and every risk at all times, so learning to be comfortable with this is important too.

I'm guessing it's prevalent in parenting spaces because there is probably some kind of hormonal shift which makes us hyper-aware of risk when we have recently given birth, which makes sense because babies and toddlers are vulnerable and have very little risk awareness of their own. But if you think about the context which this evolved in, we wouldn't have had access to so much terrifying and paralysing information, nor groups of people where we can hyperfocus on that one specific issue and worry about it. Without the internet you'd be exposed to more of a range of perspectives like in this thread - many people saying nah don't worry, it's fine, a smaller number saying oh yes that's valid, I worry about that too.

I don't know a huge amount about OCD but I do know that it can show up in different ways and not all of them are the more obvious or well known ones, but they all involve fear of harm coming to either yourself or (more commonly) a loved one, and that it is easier to spot when the connection is illogical (e.g. my family will die if I don't count my steps exactly) but it may also be involved with connections which seem logical (my child is at high risk of choking if they eat XYZ food). I know that I personally am prone to falling into OCD-like worry patterns with the reassurance seeking, this has been told to me by a doctor, although I am not actually diagnosed. Looking for ways to avoid or reduce risk is a form of reassurance seeking, which is difficult because obviously some degree of this is sensible and healthy. One podcast I listened to about it (Ologies with Allie Ward) the doctor being interviewed said that in his opinion, if you're spending more than an hour a day thinking/worrying about things like this, that is probably the point at which you should consider whether it's taking over and needs medical advice.

dottiedodah · 01/04/2026 10:32

I think at 7 there is less risk generally.However if you have said No ,she should respect that.

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