What age did you start feeling life was finally sorted?

[Justsorted]

To ask…what age (if at all) did you finally feel like everything was sorted, all was in place and you had it pretty much (as much as you can I suppose) all figured out!? I’m 41 and finally just feeling that way, after a fairly tumultuous few years, and years before that of waiting for one thing to happen before I can sort the next. I finally finally feel sorted with my family, my home, my job, finances etc etc. Now I appreciate things can change at any moment but it’s the peace I feel that I’m not waiting, I’m not striving and stressing, I can just live. I didn’t think it would take this long. What about you?

About 45. I knew by that time we were financially stable and felt we’d done a good job raising our kids (then 20 and 22). I suddenly felt more settled and calm 😊

Never

I felt like I had things pretty under control when I was 26. I had bought a house, got a good job but one that wasn't mental, my family were all in pretty good nick.

It feels a lot less sorted now: ill relatives, dying relatives, job more senior but harder to keep from eating my entire life. I'm more financially secure but mentally under much more strain.

Oh dear.. you have perimenopause to come.. that will shake things up be prepared for the chaos of hormones bit like teenage years. Never be too sure life has a way to trip up the best of plans.

At 60 and it feels further away as unexpected shit keeps happening- plus the world is in a shit place so I don’t know how anyone can be feeling their life is sorted as look around you !

Me too oldest pal had Op now in a wheelchair - you learn what and who counts in life at times like this - (several family not well and elderly relatives needing support both physically and and mentally)

When it’s over, we’ll know :-)

Can I ask what you mean by sorted please? Do you mean financially secure? (Mortgage/debts/pensions/savings) or do you mean that you feel less overwhelmed by work/children/business of life? Can you elaborate a bit more so I can decide if I agree that I’m there or decide if I’ve a bit to go…
thanks

Yes to financially, and for me after years of housing issues I finally have my own home so that has added a huge aspect to the “finally settled” feeling. So between that and feeling like I’m progressing at work, I feel like things are so good right now. I have dc and I’m aware things can change, I have some health issues but those are also under control for now so that’s good.

I felt sorted at 30. I had a pretty shitty time in my late 20's but by 30 things were feeling settled. I was lucky to marry a really amazing man. Thats not to say we've had it easy, far from it, but have always felt we would get through it. Now our children (a mix of adopted and birth) are adults we have more freedom, although 2 still live at home. Looking forward to retirement in another decade.

39 and more financially secure and growing family but we are now building a house so that feels quite chaotic.

Im guessing my 40s might feel more settled but I love a bit of chaos myself so who knows

I thought my life was pretty settled in my late thirties then got very unexpectedly pregnant with my third child at 40.
He’s 22 now and doing well, graduated last year and got himself a great grad scheme so finally at 62 I have some spare money !

I am delighted for you!

I never expect it to, I have had too many surprises.
I would advise anyone to never get too comfortable with the status quo

I was really happy until my mid-20s, and then again when I was pregnant and on maternity leave…. But much of the rest of the time I seem to lurch from one stressful situation to another, often work related so partly self inflicted. I think I was haunted by a choice I made in my early 20s which took me 20 years to reconcile - not always consciously but rumbling away in the background. I changed career in my late 30s and has been quite a struggle esp last 5 years. But I’ve had such an interesting life, and still involved in so much, I’ve definitely never been bored!! But I wish I could have been more content - still working on it.

In my late 40s. Job, child, a nice new husband and lost weight.

Sadly in my early 50’s the child has left home, the job is precarious, the husband is ok but getting old and my looks are completely shot ( ruining the effect of my weight loss)

Before I got married, 24yo. Life was fab. I was on a good crack, had my own property, new car etc. Flying!
After I got married, 45yo. I went self employed worked 2/3days a week was semi retired.
DH died in 2016, went back to work so I could take the kids to school and do some wfh. I bought a bigger house, big mortgage, lost my job during covid and became self employed - when I work I earn loads, when there's no work, which was 12m in last 24m and I claimed no benefits at all, we get by. Savings went in the last period of contract drought.

I'm hoping to buy a BTL property to reduce reliance on as much income and house is being sorted this year so I can sell it.

Hoping the land I buy with my pension will become our home then 🙏 as I'll be able to buy it from my pension with the equity from the house. If I pull it off, life will be sorted again...

I'm in my 70's and my life for the past 2 years has been very chaotic, whereas during my 50's I felt fairly "sorted".
Trouble is shit happens and usually you've got no control over life events. You can only do your best and face and cope with what life chucks at you.

Same 😵‍💫🤯

Life felt finally sorted for me at age 32ish when I met and fell in love with DH (after years of being in a coercive relationship from teenager to 30/31)...then got even better (altho tiring) we had out 2 beautiful girls at age 36 and 38.....I always wanted a family, so just felt so lucky that I finally got everything I'd wanted and waited for.....but then lost £250k on a property development deal and our finances are now ruined :( ..........just keep having to remind myself that nobody died and it could be worse....
So, op, things are not always on a straight line trajectory.

Probably 30. Then Covid happened, financial crash and now I just had a discussion with DP about what we would do if a hypersonic missile came and it actually ended up in a serious discussion about which table was most solid and whether the children would actually stay under it 😫

So …. Never?

@Justsorted 55+. 62 now and I'm hoping nothing fks it up. 😬

46, hasn't happened yet. Suspect it never does.

Bloody hell. Well done girl. 👏

65 (5 years ago now) - Woke up one morning and felt so calm and accepting of who I was and am. I still marvel at the change and have no idea how it came about but am grateful that it did. All my anger and annoyance towards systems, family behaviours, and childhood trauma had just vanished. I simply wish I knew how and why this happened, but can truthfully say that it just did.