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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Fed up with friend's dog

363 replies

Sally20099 · 28/03/2026 12:41

I’m utterly fed up with one of my friends always bringing her dog to our house. Whether she’s dropping in for a 1hr coffee or her full family come around for a couple of hours she always brings her dog. Everyone knows I am not a dog person; it is not a secret. I have two cats who I have to lock away in another room as they are indoor cats, I have to move all the cat food and cat trays as well. They spend the entire time terrified of the barking and hide under the bed. The house is not decorated for dogs - expensive carpet throughout. The dog is left alone all day while they are at work / school and has a walker visit. It can wait on its own for a couple of hours if they go somewhere that isn’t set up for dogs and they aren’t welcome. I love their company and the our eldest is best friends with their daughter but I am sick of the complete lack of bother about my preferences on this. Im not asking them to leave their children at home, it’s a stupid dog FFS. I obviously could be explicit and say don’t bring your dog, but I know she will get really upset - she’s one of these people who think her dog should be able to go into any pub, hotel, park area etc. it’s driving me nuts that she’s so dismissive of my feelings and would rather inconvenience me over herself / dog.

OP posts:
Talkingtomyhouseplants · 30/03/2026 10:26

ScoobyT · 30/03/2026 10:14

At no point did I say they were people I said they were members of the family.

The OP just needs to ask her friend not to bring her dog round. She probably thought it was absolutely fine since she has been doing it that long and it has never been an issue. Guessing she doesn’t have a crystal ball.

I just fundamentally disagree - you can think of your dog as family if you wish but at no point do I have to think of your dog as anything other than a pet.

ScoobyT · 30/03/2026 10:39

Talkingtomyhouseplants · 30/03/2026 10:26

I just fundamentally disagree - you can think of your dog as family if you wish but at no point do I have to think of your dog as anything other than a pet.

Correct you don’t but I wouldn’t expect you to make a derogatory comment about them if we were meant to be friends

LizzieW1969 · 30/03/2026 10:48

But this is MN where people do come to vent, so sometimes they will speak negatively about a friend’s dog or children. My point was that the OP’s comment was tame compared to plenty of other comments I’ve read and on here.

She’s speaking anonymously about her friend’s dog, not complaining to her face about her ‘stupid dog’. That would definitely be rude.

OnlyHasEyesForLoki · 30/03/2026 12:40

I have two very timid rescue cats who absolutely should not be expected to have a dog invade their home. Any friend who has expected to bring their dog to my house is told very firmly no! Why didn’t you say no the first time she turned up with it and insisted she take it home?

LotusMandala · 30/03/2026 17:12

Half the problems on Mumsnet can be solved by people just using their words.

sanityisamyth · 30/03/2026 17:42

”I think my cats have fleas so probably not a great idea to bring Fido on Saturday”

MandingoAteMyBaby · 30/03/2026 20:10

ILoveDaffodills · 30/03/2026 01:44

Because it's bloody rude to call something your friend values stupid whether that's her dog, house, car or bic pen.

But dogs are stupid.

They can’t drive, they never invented anything, they can’t write books, they don’t have a space programme, nor do they cook.

Stupid.

ShowMeTheSushi · 31/03/2026 13:29

MandingoAteMyBaby · 30/03/2026 20:10

But dogs are stupid.

They can’t drive, they never invented anything, they can’t write books, they don’t have a space programme, nor do they cook.

Stupid.

By that logic, most humans would qualify as ‘stupid’ too, not everyone can do all those things! 😂 Dogs aren’t meant to invent stuff, they’re animals. They’ll bark if they’re not happy, but some humans seem to prefer venting to strangers online rather than being honest with their friends. A simple ‘please don’t bring the dog next time’ would’ve solved all of this.

DreamTheMoors · 01/04/2026 07:54

i suspect that you’re REALLY more angry with your friend than you are than you with an animal that didnt choose to come along on all these trips.

Onleemoi · 01/04/2026 10:23

I think she’s more upset with herself. She’s put up with this when she could have resolved it ages ago.

Ally886 · 01/04/2026 20:25

ILoveDaffodills · 30/03/2026 01:53

You're not British are you?

Yes, very much so

ILoveDaffodills · 01/04/2026 22:38

Ally886 · 01/04/2026 20:25

Yes, very much so

Oh. I'm very much surprised 😊. You have the forthrightness of our European neighbours! 👍🏻😊

DallazMajor · 02/04/2026 08:18

Take your cats round to her house for the day.

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