AIBU to use main bathroom on holiday despite en suite?

[AliceNotInChains]

Last Easter I went away with DH, Sister and BIL. We stayed in an castle apartment.
As I have IBS and other gut issues I insisted on having a bedroom with an en suit for my benefit and everyone else’s. This was fine, DH and I got the room with the little en-suite. On the first night we were watching a film in the living room and I got up to pop to toilet, I went into the main bathroom and they all started shouting that I should use my own bathroom. I laughed and said I’m only going for a wee and this was met with more shouting of “you have your own toilet”, DH then said “she does this at home too, claims ownership on one toilet then uses everyone else’s”

Anyway it went on and on, the whole 3 nights were spent with them trying to stop me using the main bathroom. I think it started as a joke but they were 100% being serious by the end of it.

Anyway we’re due to go back tomorrow, same place and already sister is dropping hints about whoever gets the en suite uses that exclusively.

Am I the one in the wrong here?? I’m only using main bathroom for peeing btw

If they’re paying the same it’s greedy. Each couple gets a bedroom and a bathroom. The OP was granted her wish to have the master with the ensuite so she should use that.

Makes you wonder if she’s old enough to be staying away from home and not understood what a light switch is for. OP is being totally unreasonable

No, as another poster says, the upgrade poo is a thing.

No, I haven’t missed any point. The OP has taken the en-suite ( and probably the master bedroom) for herself and her husband. That means that the other bathroom is for the other couple. It is not a communal bathroom. OP’s husband and the other couple agree with that. OP doesn’t want to be inconvenienced by walking down the corridor during the day. The other couple are already inconvenienced by having to walk down the corridor at night. Swings and roundabouts.

This makes the most sense if OP insists on using the Main Bathroom. Obviously the others won't use it if they have their own ensuite, so win-win for OP.

But to be perfectly honest, I wouldn’t want to holiday with people who made a lot of noise and fuss about an uncomfortable and possibly embarrassing medical issue of mine. I’d find their behaviour rude and deliberately humiliating.

Is toilet humour a big feature of your family life? Lots of fart jokes and comments about smelly poos? That being your family’s norm is the only excuse I can think of for this behaviour.

It wasn't very nice of them to make a big thing out of it, but I'd probably be a bit annoyed, too, if someone got the ensuite and then used 'my' bathroom as well, especially if it were because of a spooky corridor. I've had IBS, so I understand wanting a private toilet, but you shouldn't try to have it both ways. (I'd also be annoyed at the person already bringing up the bathroom situation before you're even there, though. Not exactly a positive start to the holiday!)

YABU to be such a wet lettuce about a "spooky corridor" if the corridor scares you, give up the ensuite. You've got your way with the ensuite, so use it and leave the bathroom for the others.

Monsters and paintings with eyes that follow you.........

Castle apartment? Insisting on your own bathroom? Scared of a spooky corridor? Are you actually a princess?

Unless you paid a bigger share for the master/en suite then no you shouldn't be helping yourself to the other bathroom as well.

You forced everyone else to have rooms without an en-suite then decided to use the main bathroom anyway 🤣🤣🤣

Bless your dear heart.

I think they're being a bit precious, but there is maybe a bit of resentment at you getting an en suite if they might have liked one too. I would just use your own one to keep the peace, it's not really a big deal either way (spooky corridor is a ridiculous excuse and I can see why they would be annoyed at that).

Spooky corridor, family fallouts about toilets?! Why would you book to go back to the same place if this was such an issue for you?!

Find somewhere to stay with a better layout where this won’t be an issue. Bathroom for each family and a separate toilet to share would probably be best.

Unless you are paying more for the en-suite, you don’t get your own private bathroom and then use of theirs as well.

I think your DH sister and BIL are being super petty! These are people who are supposed to love you ffs! I can't imagine begrudging my DH or sister having a wee!

FFS use the main bathroom if it's closer and the ensuite if you have IBS.

My lovely sister in law asks for the same accommodation. I have never thought or kept track of which bathroom they actually use.

No. Use your own designated one. I don't use the main bathroom in my own house. I just use the en suite as that is mine ... I hate the thought of other people's bums and odours.

I’m You don’t want to use the en-suite due to Ghost / Spookiness… I suggest you have a word with yourself

I like my own bathroom. If DH and I went away with another couple and they took the en-suite then I'd expect them to leave the main bathroom for me.

You are scared to use the en-suite that you insisted on claiming? Honestly OP you sound hard work. Hope you can laugh with your family when they tease you about it.

I think the major problem here is with the terminology being used. If you're a family - particularly with young children - then you will indeed often have an en-suite for the parents to use and a 'main' family bathroom that everybody uses. After all, little ones probably don't use it without adult assistance and couldn't care less about privacy, skidders or bad smells; and they won't be the ones cleaning it.

When it's two adult couples, in OP's scenario, there is no 'main' bathroom. Each couple have their own bathroom, but it just so happens that one of them is attached to their own bedroom whilst the other comes off the main living area.

This. I honestly cannot believe people are supporting the op here. If op is on the main toilet 3 other people cannot use any.

If op and her husband are in the main bedroom because she has to have an en suite, the brother and his wife have take a lesser bedroom. If it is a twin bedroom, and OP is using both bathrooms but nobody else can, I would not expect to pay the same.

If op wants the bathroom nearest the living accommodation because she is scares of ghosts, her and her husband can take the lesser bedroom. Or pay more.

Or stay someone where you don't think you will be accosted on the corridor by a headless Elizabethan or dead MP missing his trousers.

So if they need to look and you’re in it, they have to wait even though you demanded your own.
you sound ridiculous about the corridor too.

I can see their point.

You made a big point about having your own toilet, so I get why they found it a bit annoying when you used theirs..

I'd tell them you don't want the en-suite so will use the main bathroom. They can live with the consequences of any flare up.
Sounds like you were being thoughtful to use a toilet out of the way. Can't see the harm in using any toilet available. Your family are weird and dh is a bit of a twat.

Nobody is begrudging her having a wee in the slightest. If she needs a wee, she has her own (shared with her DH) designated toilet specifically to do it in.

Is she begrudging her DSis and BIL having a wee by expecting them to use their own bathroom to do it in?

It's like me wailing that my neighbour wants me to starve and is begrudging me basic food, by not allowing me to freely go and help myself out of their fridge; when I have a well-stocked fridge of my own that is clearly and purposefully for my use (and which I also don't let my neighbour come and use).