A genuine or accidentally-on-purpose email sent by mistake?

[roses19837]

Yesterday I saw that DH received a what appears to be obviously an accidental email from a former, younger female employee. The email was addressed to a group, staring 'hi all,' and from what I could see, was all about writing content for a website. Nothing to do with what DH does. DH just left the email, didn't reply, and went back to his inbox. He never mentioned it to me, but why would he? A silly accidental email is no piece of news really...

This employee left the company after an internship with my DH's business last summer.

As a bit of background, most of DH's work was from home, so he didn't see this woman in person all that often.

I used to suspect that DH was a bit too chatty and familiar with this young woman, although he never contacted her inappropriately outside of work. I met her several times when I went with DH to the office, and he always seemed smily and enthralled with her and what she was saying, which I did have words with him about, and he did later tone this down.

I wonder whether this girl 'accidentally on purpose' sent this email, in an attempt to strike up a conversation with DH? If so, would it be worth me telling DH to block her? I did used to wonder whether she liked the attention he gave her before I had words with him (she seems like the kind of young woman who would like attention, always dressed immaculately and hair styled etc). I could of course just be overthinking this

I'm not obsessed with the woman herself, but by the fact that my DH seemed to fancy her. I did compare myself with her, and I think DH is foolish for liking a woman like that. I didn't think she was his type.

I'm not homophobic at all.

I’m not saying you are. You’re probably lovely to get people and treat them with respect.
but I think you’ve had some very confusing feelings about this girl - be it insecurity about your own aging, or some form of attraction you can’t name (and I think more likely the latter) - and you need help processing them.

Why ‘foolish’ - because he finds an attractive younger woman attractive? Look at most people’s celeb crushes - they couldn’t be more different than their actual partners

you can’t seem to decide whether the issue is with her for existing or him for being ‘silly’ or being ‘inapproriate’.

You won’t admit that you are being irrational because you genuinely don’t seem to care.!

You are clearly very bitter about it - I would advise you consider some kind of therapy because your mind is all over the place.

And I was the subject of the glaring jealous wife when I was younger (just because I was young) - I just thought the husband was a perv and the wife was batshit!

I think the wife was staring at you and finding excuses to come to work for very different reasons but like I said, some things are glaringly obvious to an outsider

?? What reasons?

She didnt come to work. But like the OP she seemed to think I was going to fuck her husband and made a point of doing those possessive little gestures 🤣

I think she had a crush on you too! And was using her husband as an excuse to surveille you.

What are you talking about? She didn’t come into work.

Why assume she had a crush? What an odd conclusion to jump to.

I could have fucked him but he wasn’t my type.

Because I thought you were seeing a lot of op in your situation. I don’t have the version where I can exclusively look at your posts.
idk your version but I know bicurious women and op you’ve got it bad

oh hang on - you are the one obsessed with it being some sort of gay attraction?

You realise that is an odd way of looking at things - and fair play, I didn’t expect to agree with the OP on anything

Are you drunk?

i was saying how sleazy men want to fuck younger females who work for them and the wife, instead of binning them off, glare at the woman involved and make them the villain of the piece.

It’s not odd. Op comes on describing a woman and how she dresses and hating her because she can’t stop thinking about her. Shes of a generation where this wasn’t talked about. Shes got no reason not to trust her husband and she’s finding excuses to go into work every day? How am I the only one seeing this?!

You have decided the OP is bicurious instead of just possessive and controlling. That’s quite a leap

Idk what she’s like with other women but I know what she’s like with this woman.

My issue is mostly with my husband for leering at her, but I do also think that she encouraged DH by laughing and chatting back to him.

Okay well that’s quite offensive - she is 50, not 90 - I’m a few years older than her and we talked about it plenty in that generation. We had political lesbians, most girls I knew at school had a phase of it etc.

You are the only one seeing this because the way your mind works is seriously bizarre.

I think you must be on a wind up. The Op situation is fucked up enough without people making shit up and pretending that they are the only one clever enough to have noticed.

I know - I don't know where she's got the bicurious thing from. I'm not - i've always only been attracted to men.

i was born in the 90s and it was brave to be openly gay at school: my best friend was horribly bullied. Uni was a bit more open but even then it was still kept quiet.
I’m being generous and seeing a different perspective to you. You’re assuming internalised misogyny, I’m assuming internalised homophobia.
we are not enemies

Laughing and chatting? With her boss? Wow what a slapper 🙄

I had a boss many years ago with whom I would often work late. I was early 20s, he was late 30s. After work he would often invite me for a drink. He would phone his wife to say what he was doing. We used to talk and laugh a lot.

Because his wife was a rational
woman, instead of acting like the OP, she understood the concept of platonic relationships. And I’m still friends with both of them,

Look I don’t know your sexuality I can only say what this looks like from my perspective… which you asked for. She’s definitely making you feel something and I think it’s worth exploring even if I’m wrong

I did think that poster's replies were bizarre.

And I’m explaining that being gay was ‘the thing’ in the 80s. It may not have been for you but it was to the extent that it was actually quite fashionable.

You aren’t ’being generous’, you are making ridiculous assumptions based on your own projections.

And of course we aren’t ‘enemies’ - how ridiculous. You are a randomer on a chat site who had perhaps had a few too many drinks

Seriously dude, put down the drink and go to bed, Do you assume every person is gay? Are you? Because that’s some projection/repression right there

Me too! And talking about people in their 50s as if they are Victorian… 😱

Who are you to say they’re ridiculous?
she literally finds reasons to get this woman’s attention, to go into work, to find out what she’s doing etc. she knows how she dresses and blames her for the reaction she causes.
its not ridiculous. It might not be correct but it didn’t come out of nowhere

And you know that you are the only one thinking this? Well that is probably because it’s mad as fuck