I am so sick of hearing about menopause

[haveyouheardthemenopauseisshit]

I get the menopause is a big deal for many women and the symptoms are not nice.

However, do we have to talk about it all the time? I feel like I am hearing about it multiple times a day. We have menopause awareness sessions and e-learning at work. I’m targeted by advertising every time I look at my phone for some new product / vitamin / book etc which is supposed to help with menopause symptoms. I feel like it’s constantly being mentioned on the radio, TV, by people I know.

If someone is forgetful, it’s the menopause. If they’re tired, it’s the menopause. If they’re angry, it’s the menopause. If they’re hot, it’s the menopause.

I’m 39 and I feel bombarded by all of this “THE MENOPAUSE IS COMING SOON AND IT WILL BE SHIT” messaging.

I am also a bit worried that it will make it even harder to be taken seriously as a woman in the workplace, since the prevailing message now seems to be that women over 45 are basically useless because of all the issues caused by their hormones.

I’m guessing I’ll be in the minority here and everyone else will think that the awareness raising is a good thing but I just find it quite depressing!

Most girls don't speak about periods to family members? Really? I'm sure it's not that bloody unusual to talk about the to your mum, sister or grandma.

And I was at an all girls school. Hot topic of conversation in year 7 and 8.

Even had someone from tampax come in a talk to us about periods and give us samples of tampons in a blue plastic container along with a book called" have you started yet" That would've been 1982/3

Maybe your experience is more unusual

I worry that younger women will dread menopause, expect it to be awful and even neglect health issues like joint pain, assuming it's menopause. The voices of the women who "sail through it" are quieter and even shut down. I wonder if starting articles/sentences with "while many women experience few or mild symptoms..." before launching into all the negativity. I'm out the other side now. I did have a few perimenopause symptoms which I did buy some pretty expensive stuff to sort out lol! But I am enjoying being period free, contraception free and feeling pretty stable. There are things to celebrate too! I'm sure the noise around it will quieten down when the awareness feels saturated.I don't talk about it much as I get into trouble with my friends for having a positive view of it! I didn't talk about my dreadful birth experience with women who were yet to give birth either...the power of suggestion is real folks!

Agree
Late 50s and nothing

At some point I was very hot at night, it lasted about a month and then stopped
I noticed late 40s/early 50s I wasn’t doing many of the larger projects in the office and when queried was told they felt the need to ‘reduce confusing workload …..at this time’

They got a formal complaint and were compelled to stop the discrimination.

If people, and I mean anyone for what ever reason, can’t cope at work they need to discuss that with their superiors.
No one should ever make assumptions and I am sick of it too OP

I don’t know yet, I’m also fed up of hearing about it - BUT I’m 42, maybe I just haven’t got to the worst bit yet. (Secretly I just can’t wait for my periods to stop)

I disagree it’s not unusual at all

of note I was at school the same time as you and we didn’t have visits and freebies from Tampax or anyone at all
We had a sex segregated discussion on periods ( and basically told no we wouldn’t be allowed off PE IG it was bad )

That’s it

Although The school nurse used to keep some spare sanitary towels if girls got caught short. Not tampons though

It’s great to hear some women don’t suffer at all, I’ve never heard a positive experience before. Even perimenopause which apparently can start 10 years before the full thing is sold as being utterly miserable. I’m very fortunate to have always been so healthy, I don’t need medication of any sort and touch wood no health conditions at all. The thought of needing a concoction of pills to feel normal fills me with dread. Worse still, the thought of waking up every day feeling like death.

YABU

It affects half of the population and is not something to be brushed under the carpet.

It DOESNT affect half the population to a bad degree though

But whilst half the population go through menopause
it doesn’t affect half the population
with 15% having no symptoms at all and
some of the remaining only experiencing mild symptoms ( I’m probably in that category with a month of feeling hot ).
Approx 20-25% of women describe their symptoms as severe

Interestingly I saw on the TV a while ago a doc stating less women in Japan seem to have severe symptoms
I’ve just googled why

‘ Japanese women do experience menopause, but studies indicate they have fewer and less severe symptoms—such as hot flashes—compared to Western women,
often due to a combination of high soy intake, cultural perceptions of aging, and lifestyle factors. Key factors include:

• Dietary Isoflavones: A traditional diet rich in soy products (tofu, miso, natto) provides phytoestrogens. These plant-based compounds can mimic, boost, or balance oestrogen levels during the decline.
• Cultural View of Konenki:Menopause, or konenki, is viewed as a natural "renewal" or "season" of life, rather than the "beginning of the end" or a medical emergency, reducing psychological stress.
• Reduced Body Mass Index (BMI):Generally lower weight and a diet lower in fat and sugar may contribute to a smoother transition.
• Cultural Reporting Differences:Some research suggests Japanese women may report fewer symptoms due to cultural norms that prioritize stoicism over complaining about the menopause

Konenki is often considered a 10-year period (roughly 40s to 60s) of gradual change rather than a sudden event. While hot flashes are fewer, Japanese women do report other symptoms like stiff shoulders and headaches

I agree it needs to be talked about so people know how and where to get treatment if necessary. But not to the extent it is discussed because it’s the same information over and over again with lots of companies trying to make money from it.

It’s the latest thing. I’ve been through the menopause and I’m bored rigid with it as well.

I agree. How and where to access systemic hrt if you want it is important.

Local, vaginal oestrogen is VERY important unless you want to be up in the night for a wee multiple times, your bits to atrophy and your orgasms to fade away. IMO this is the most important thing to be aware of BECAUSE HARDLY ANYONE DISCUSSES IT!!!!

Everything else (special shampoos, face cream etc) is just licence to print money and unnecessary imo.

The problem is that while women expect to be treated equally they also now seem to expect to be given a free pass at every stage of life.

First it’s PMT which we must give women a free pass for if they are miserable/snappy/generally unpleasant.

Then they fall pregnant, so need to be given a break. No challenging a woman when she’s pregnant.

Then they have a baby and must be suffering because of that.

Then comes this apparent peri menopause which seems to have materialised in the past ten years or so.

And then it’s menopause.

So when women become upset over the fact people call them hormonal, they might want to consider that if they expect special treatment based on hormones which are all a natural part of life, then they can hardly blame people fr referring to them as hormonal.

Fucking hell. Who let the mysoginist in.

I think it is fair to say that a lot of men would probably agree with @ThereAreOnlyShadesOfGrey

I think that's just called being a decent person and considering others rather than 'a free pass'.

Agree what a terrible post !

In all honesty, I think this is a bit ridiculous. I mean, if it's not happening to you, why not push it off down the road and tell yourself you have the knowledge to deal with it when or if it happens?

Truthfully, most women's reproductive health lives are, at some points, complicated in one way or another.

For example, I had terrible period pains, fell pregnant easily but only when I wanted to, had HG in 2 out of 3 pregnancies but easy unmedicated births (not even gas and air), an easy time breastfeeding and relatively easy babies who turned into easy to parent children. No peri symptoms at all, a sudden cessation of periods at 56 and along with that came crazy hot flushes and stiff fingers and knees and night sweats. I've always been a big exercise person and didn't like the thought of bad knees, so took myself off to a bio identical hormone clinic, got some hrt (topical cream that goes on my wrists and a lozenge that I dissolve under my tongue and some vaginal oestrogen) and haven't looked back.

I can still run a half marathon without weeing myself and my libido, professional life, skin, hair and weight are all absolutely fine. I do not require 'a concoction of pills' nor do I wake up every day 'feeling like death.'

I still think more information is better than less.

I'm a bit with this - it's good to have information but what annoys me is the
' need to talk about it, raise awareness, have special days and training, sell products'.
I hate that natural life stages (especially in women) are packaged up social virtue signalling and preached about like the latest zeitgeist moment.

I would value accurate, non judgemental basic info on physiology and health starting at school and available through life stages so that women know what to expect across their lifetime and aren't blindsided. It would be amazing to have employers who have fair employment practices and honour sickness, health adjustments/maternity leave adequately for all employees when they need it, for whatever reason. A medical profession that take individual patients symptoms and womans health seriously, accessible evidence based treatments would actually be helpful for women in their menopausal phase of life.

Smarming charity awareness raising do-gooders trying to make a name for themselves by running unctuous Menopause cafes and educational events can just fuck OFF. Why we are expected to be thrilled by workplaces jumping on the bandwagon of belatedly acknowledging the reality of womens lives and physiology? so now we are expected to sit dewy-eyed and greatful, to be patronised and 'educated' about our own experiences, knowing we are either expected to overshare personal details with colleagues or be watched for menopausal signs and symptoms, and our actions judged by theses standards just as surely as our behaviour in earlier life phases was ascribed to periods or pregnancy. Why does being a woman undergoing menopause now need to be redefined as a special, vulnerable group and given this focus?

Agree with this.

Im not on any social media other than MN and genuinely don’t get “bombarded” so I’m wondering if it’s through these channels people are seeing and hearing it all too?

Good luck

@Emigreei do agree with you on that.

Quite possibly, yes.

I can assure you that, lol, going to an all girls school puts you in the unusual category. And dare I say privileged? There’s no need to swear.

Wait till it gts hold of you and you'll want to talk about it.