I am so sick of hearing about menopause

[haveyouheardthemenopauseisshit]

I get the menopause is a big deal for many women and the symptoms are not nice.

However, do we have to talk about it all the time? I feel like I am hearing about it multiple times a day. We have menopause awareness sessions and e-learning at work. I’m targeted by advertising every time I look at my phone for some new product / vitamin / book etc which is supposed to help with menopause symptoms. I feel like it’s constantly being mentioned on the radio, TV, by people I know.

If someone is forgetful, it’s the menopause. If they’re tired, it’s the menopause. If they’re angry, it’s the menopause. If they’re hot, it’s the menopause.

I’m 39 and I feel bombarded by all of this “THE MENOPAUSE IS COMING SOON AND IT WILL BE SHIT” messaging.

I am also a bit worried that it will make it even harder to be taken seriously as a woman in the workplace, since the prevailing message now seems to be that women over 45 are basically useless because of all the issues caused by their hormones.

I’m guessing I’ll be in the minority here and everyone else will think that the awareness raising is a good thing but I just find it quite depressing!

No but we don't need to blame every physical /mental ailment on menopause once you reach a certain age. We all know what the menopause is. There are 30 year olds now thinking they are going through peri menopause. I do understand that some women go through a horrific time with it but some don't. It's very scaremongering and one sided.

When I was 39 I felt fucking fantastic and on fire every day. 6 years later perimenopause came and slapped me across the face like a wet fish. I'm 53 now and each year gets worse and worse.

In a few years time you may well find yourself humbled and eating your words.

I hope for your sake that's not going to happen because believe me, perimenopause and menopause can be brutal and we need to talk and talk and talk about it until it's understood by all that it can be one of the most difficult times of a women's entire life. Please let's not go back to our mother's and grandmother's era when this was all a taboo subject and women suffering in secret.

My 18 year old knows all about my peri journey. I'm writing her a journal of the good and bad so when she enters this time of her life she doesn't go in blind.

Come back to us in 5+ years time and then let's see what your opinion is.

I think greater awareness is good but I do agree in that it is EVERYWHERE right now. And not EVERY woman suffers terribly… there needs to be more balance.

More awareness is a good thing. Doctors finally taking women's health seriously is a good thing.

having that information allowed me to talk about symptoms without (on the whole) being told it's a natural stage so just suck it up.

This. ^

I agree with you @haveyouheardthemenopauseisshit and I don't think you're being goady at all (like some posters have suggested.) You are entitled to feel how you feel. And around 40% of posters agree with you according to the poll.

I also agree with this that you said.

I am also a bit worried that it will make it even harder to be taken seriously as a woman in the workplace, since the prevailing message now seems to be that women over 45 are basically useless because of all the issues caused by their hormones.

Don't let people bring you down - you're entitled to your views. And just like the poster I quoted here, I also had virtually NO menopause symptoms. My last period was in my early 50s, around 5 years ago, so I am well into it, maybe even past it, and apart from a few night sweats, I had very little symptoms. And I definitely didn't have 'perimenopause...' In fact, when I was at the age where I was meant to be having it, I had never even heard of it. I only heard of it for the first time ever, around 4-5 years ago!

I don't know why some women refuse to believe other women who say they never had any menopause symptons - or very few. Maybe they don't want to believe it...

YES to this!

But it has to be balanced. Seeing all women as a liability due to their hormones does none of us any favours.

Of course there should be awareness but that doesn’t mean everyone will have the same experience so it’s not a ‘one size fits all’ - and yes I have been through menopause.

A 40 something relative came up to me at a party at Christmas and said ‘how are you finding peri menopause?’ with a grim, sympathetic expression on her face. I am 38, but even if I was 45 I would have found it so annoying.

So refreshing to read this.

@haveyouheardthemenopauseisshit I'm 65 and I agree with you. I knew about menopause from my mother; she from hers.

In my mid 40s I became irregular and was wringing out my nightie and showering twice a night and very close to my rope for much of the time. Marvellous collision with pre pubescent DC/teenager and doing some professional quals.

Dr, HRT, when HRT and GP were a bit crap, paod £300 to see a gynaecologist and got the right stuff at the right doses.

I was done at 49.

Benefits: no more periods, no more fluctuating discharge, hair less greasy, no more monthly headaches, no more contraception, etc, etc.

I hate the ads on the tube, can’t even remember what brand it’s for.
something about how perimenopause makes you fat
so insulting and patronising

There are many many things that I am bored to the back teeth of hearing about but this isn't one of them.

As someone upthread said, we have always had to fight against the reluctance of employers to take on women of child bearing age, and we now potentially look like a liability because of menopause leave, period leave etc.

Knowledge and awareness is one thing but blaming every ache, pain or forgetfulness on the menopause is misleading and does the cause of women no good. Ditto “ time of the month” explanations for any anxiety or moodiness. It’s not a blanket experience for everyone. Help is available for those who suffer extreme symptoms, which is fantastic and we should all know about it, but not everyone needs it.

Well hopefully it will stop other women getting the sack like I did if there's a bit more awareness.

Women are women .
We have our bodies.
We are linked to their issues
Women denying this reality or men proclaiming to be women are mentally unwell and need help (not referring here to the genuine born with both genitalia), the genuine biological cases.

Voted YANBI because at 39 I completely agreed with you and hated the constant mention of it, like an impending doom. I'm now in my mid 40s, feel like I've been hit by a train and despite not having tested whether it's more than lip service, glad mh workplace seem sympathetic

Yeah, they won’t be employed in the first place unfortunately

I don't want my every emotion or flaw being chalked up to hormonal fanny-ons by everyone around me.

Fully agree op and fwiw I am feeling better in my mid 40s than at any other time in my adult life.

Yes, me too, OP.
Sick of hearing about it (47 yo woman).
I mean, what the F is gonna happen to me,
am I going to lose my mind and put on thirty pounds? I suffer anxiety as well. 😐
Sorry.

Yes, because issues that affect women are famously over-talked about and discussed 🙄

I don’t think I had even heard of peri before coming onto MN. 🫣. Even before my hysterectomy at 50, I had zero symptoms of anything. I took HRT for three years after, which ended twelve years ago and I still don’t even suffer from dryness. I wonder why it hits some women so horribly and others not at all.

The thing is OP, is that you’re hearing about it all the time now because somehow, as a society, we managed to get this far into the 21st century without talking about it all. Worse, hiding it. And now we have a huge problem where women are actually dying because of it, or its associated problems. Don’t forget that menopause doesn’t just affect those of a certain age but also women that have common and serious illness. To talk about one, we need to talk about the other.

I have no doubt that it’ll all settle down and it’ll all be normal in time but until then you need to hear about it a lot in order that the inequalities in healthcare for women and the injustices of the past can be put right. Which also includes additions to the equalities act, which has a direct influence on how women are treated in the workplace.

It's like those women who tell you OH JUST YOU WAIT YOU'LL NEVER SLEEP AGAIN when you say you're pregnant

Then it's BABIES ARE EASY WAIT TIL THEYRE WALKING

Then TODDLERS ARE GREAT JUST WAIT TIL THEIR TEENS! LIFE IS SHIT YOU MIGHT AS WELL SET YOURSELF ON FIRE!!!

You'd think from the way some people are desperate to link every human issue to menopause that they would be perfect if only they hadn't been born with ovaries

You're 45. You are within totally normal age range to not yet have any symptoms. If you haven't experienced it yet you have no place to be telling other women how it's a 'natural stage' so they should STFU. Let's hope you sail through eh, but if not, think back to this post in 2-3 years

Bulbs bulbs i got sacked too for saying the working environment was too hot. The woman who reported me was clearly menop...oh I can't be arsed to repeat the tediously story re women undermining other women it's sooo sad and depressing. what happened to you? X