AIBU to expect some dinner in the house?

[Newboymum2023]

I've just got back from a Monday-Friday staycation with my DS 3yo. We've had a lovely time, but if you've ever been away with a toddler, you'll understand that's it's not exactly a relaxing holiday! It's been full on, no naps, later bedtimes than usual, on top of which he's been battling a cough/sore throat which I now have too. DH did not come with us as he didn't have enough annual leave at work. For context, DH works from home, 4 days a week (has one day off). He finishes at 6pm.
Anyway, I've got home and he's asked what I want for dinner to which I replied "what have we got". Well. Turns out we've got nothing (to make an actual meal, anyway). So now I either have to do bedtime on my own whilst he goes to the shop or vice versa. AIBU to expect him to have at least picked something easy up whilst I've been away? I know he's been to the supermarket at least 3 times to get food for himself. There's not even any milk in the fridge for a cuppa.

So did we find out what @Newboymum2023 had to eat in the end last night ?

I wonder who’s cooking tonight 🤔

Make him buy you your favourite takeaway. He can join in too. Make sure he pays for it though 😁

What does crumbs have to do with making sure there is enough to make a meal for people to eat in the house knowing your wife and child are returning from a trip?

Its just another example of domestic chores that men dont think of in the same way as women.

Ahh I see 👀 good, cos looking after a toddler for a week sounds hard bloomin work to me 😆😆

It was four days they were away, not four months.

I'd be unhappy with this .. some effort or forward thinking wouldn't go amiss .

You haven’t been on a staycation, you’ve been away. Yes, he’s been thoughtless. Takeaway delivery platforms often do groceries too

Please. He doesn't need grace because he doesn't drink milk - I suspect when you sort out the shopping you buy stuff only he likes, because you're a woman and it's expected that you don't only think of yourself.

I absolutely hate how men are infantilised so much, that a man who's had a day off and every evening to himself can't possibly be expected to sort out a shop, even a small one, whereas OP who has been looking after a toddler all week is?

A staycation is when you are off work and stay home and probably do some fun day trips. It does not mean a holiday in the UK
would have been kind of your husband to get food in

Doesn’t that make you want to never ever see him again?

Staycation? No, holiday.
It sounds like you’re tired & would have appreciated more choice of food in the house. Better communication by both of you would have prevented this.

Im only back to find out what was for dinner, 2 nights in a row now OP hasnt let us know?

I mean, was chips or jacket spuds, was it salad or frozen peas, was it mushrooms, or fried onions rings?

I know I will get slated for this but I often see a comment about doing bedtime alone. Why does it take 2 of you? I agree with others, get a takeaway. You have been on holiday but he has been working

I don’t think any family dynamic is perfect and there will be moments like this all the time …. You have a cold , do has a cold , your both under the weather. FH has been busy working and a bit peed he couldn’t come . Maybe some communication earlier in the day re the evening meal would have averted this situation

When I went away to my friends funeral in the UK, when I got home, he said - don't worry, dinners in the oven, he took out a small side dish of potato gratin . That was it. I call it weaponized incompetence. F knows how he ever lived on his own. I never expect anything, that way I cannot be disappointed. He is a very kind clever man, just no common sense.

Its all about awareness, something that most men do not have.

Seems a common theme on MN!

Totally understand you’ve had a tiring week.
Did he know when you were coming home and that the whole family required dinner? If this wasn’t an explicit conversation he is a bit thoughtless, but not a mind-reader.

Choose your battles. Yes its not ideal but not the end of the world. I would just get a take away.