To be upset over ruined photo shoot?

[iamjustgutted]

Gutted about this.

I spent admittedly far too much on a Mother’s Day photo shoot. Had it today and was awful. Kids not playing ball at all; ds wild and charging around like a complete lunatic, dd whiny and refusing to do anything she was asked.

I know it’s just kids etc but I can’t lie; I’m gutted.

Could you try again in a few months when the children may be more cooperative? I think groupon do offers.

I hope you get a few that will be ok. I agree, I hardly have any with me and the kids, only if we do selfies, it is sad really.

Honestly, I wouldn’t bother again. I doubt they’d be any more cooperative in a few months, I’m feeling like a useless, shit mother on top of everything else.

Please don't talk so negatively about yourself.

Kids are just awkward buggers haha.

I bet you're doing a great job, you're just upset and disappointed which is fine.

It's absolutely no reflection on your skills as a mother. You're being too hard on yourself. Look at all the folk here who've experienced exactly the same thing - totally normal for young children to be high spirited or bashful when someone's trying to take a photo.

OP, was it a sit-down, studio type setting? My recommendation for photo shoots with young kids is always go for photographers that do outdoor natural type settings. I can’t imagine the posed ones would ever turn out that well even with quietly sitting kids. My fave photo shoot ever was our second child newborn one with our eldest aged 4… we were in a park with the photographer running round after us and looked so natural. Just a thought for if you wanted to book another try some time.

Ps ignore the people giving you shit for even doing a photo shoot. I’ve studied photography and I really love the photos we have had professionally done. The quality is so much better compared to a phone photo. It’s worth investing in, in my opinion. It’s fine if people don’t agree but don’t be judgey and say people are vain or whatever. There is a value in professional photos and supporting creativity.

OP, it seems shit now I totally get it. But imagine how funny and iconic a photo of you surrounded by red faced and tantrumming and grumpy kids will be in a few years time? It’ll be one of those things you remember forever

Yes, it was in a studio. A studio filled with sticks and giant logs. Honestly, RTFT.

I understand. I wouldn’t have spent money on photos because I know my DC wouldn’t have played ball when much younger at all but I know what it’s like when you just want a nice pic of them at least looking at the camera. You do look back and laugh when they’re older but I get it.

Pick the worst one of everyone with the biggest log of the day and frame it and put it in the downstairs loo or somewhere, you’ll laugh once you calm down!

Sounds like you’ve made two fundamental mistakes

1. booking a photoshoot outside in early March meaning there’s a high probability of unsuitable weather
2. not prepared your children for what’s going to happen at the shoot and what will be expected of them.

Whoops sorry. I see you were outdoors.

I hope the photographer surprises you when you get them back! Maybe they could see something although you thought it went terribly 🤞🤞🤞

FGS, yeah I really want to be reminded of the day I threw £80 down the toilet.

It isn’t just the photoshoot but it was meant to be the one nice thing in what has frankly been an awful week and I have asked nicely for people to stop tittering about it. The kids were awful and it’s hard not to see that as a reflection on you.

So, this morning’s photoshoot was (perhaps) a disaster. What have you been doing with your children this afternoon? I am just wondering because in the past 7+ hours you posted 42 times…

We did a four seasons photoshoot series last year, very mixed results! I wanted to do it as like OP, there's never and photos of me with the kids or photos with the whole family in. 30 mins per shoot. We always did them outside but chose a different location for each shoot. The winter one was the worst, the kids were just too cold! I also felt a bit disappointed when looking through the photos that there weren't more decent ones, but we're already looking back and just finding them hilarious now! We did get a few good ones though across the four shoots, which made it worth it.

The photographer we used also does mini shoots, 15 mins for £50 and you could choose 5 photos from the 100 odd she'd take (or pay a bit more to have access to them all digitally, think it was about £30 for them all). You had to do those at a location of her choosing, as she books clients in back to back at e.g. a PYO flower farm in summer, woodland/pumpkin patch in autumn or an area with lots of blossoms/daffs in spring. Could be a cheaper option for you to try next time OP if you can find something similar near you, and it's easier on the kids' attention spans!

I get why you're upset, OP.

I have very few photos with my dear Dad, as he was always the one taking them. Those that I do have are very precious.
Both mum and dad died many years ago, but are still loved and missed. And photos trigger many happy memories.

I hope your DH and DCs spoil you tomorrow and you have a lovely Mother's Day.

💐

Being excited about sticks and running about when you're out in nature and cuddling your dad is by no means being awful and doesn't reflect anything negative on you at all.

They didn't perform for the camera is all. Can't be cross with them for that.

I absolutely get why you’re feeling so disappointed and I’m really sorry you do. I know what it’s like to be in barely any photos with the kids despite being the one who does 99% of everything with them and have booked similar photoshoots on the same basis. Yes they’re expensive but so worth it for the photos you get, IF it goes well, so I can see why you’re so gutted. Have you had the full album back yet?? You may be pleasantly surprised. A good photographer can really pull some lovely shots from what feels like a shitshow… I’d know 👀

@DappledThings if was more the not listening at all that was very wearing and made me a bit embarrassed. But yes point taken.

Thanks for kind points although I’m wearily going to ask again people stop insisting it’s hilarious; it isn’t.

Take today to feel sad. Tomorrow is a new day and with any luck the photos may be better than you think. They don’t need to be perfect to capture the love between you.

Wait to see the photos
Then report back !

Look, honestly the photos are not what I wanted, they were forced and posed and strained, not natural and loving and warm. But … it is done now.

I feel for you OP - we had a family photoshoot in the autumn and it was a faff to organise, and my DD vommed all over herself just before it started (luckly it was onto her jacket which was wipe clean - but STILL - a stressful start!). The shoot was a present from my parents, so I can’t speak to the financial aspect, but it wasn’t cheap. We had a great photographer who managed to get the best out of my daughter. Having said all this it was a lot of work organising it, choosing the location, timing it so the weather was good, getting my toddler to agree to wear a nice outfit etc etc - so if it had been a disaster I would’ve been gutted also.

I’m not sure why so many people have been so unkind and dismissive of that. It doesn’t take a genius to understand you additionally have complex views around the lack of photos of you/your mum, and the fact that this was a mother’s day treat.

Anyway - if your photographer was experienced I would hold out till the photos are available - they may have worked a miracle. I hope you feel better about it all tomorrow xx

I’m sorry you’re disappointed OP, it is rubbish when something you were looking forward to doesn’t go the way you pictured it. For what its worth I really would recommend having a proper chat with your DH about taking photos of you with the kids, especially given how you feel about a lack of photos with your own mum. I have 2 very young children and a photoshoot would give me exactly zero nice pictures, any I did get would look staged/forced/probably a toddler pulling her best angry face BUT my husband knows how important it is that we have photos of everyone and he does make the effort to get photos often when I haven’t even noticed he had his phone out. No they aren’t perfectly polished photos with beautiful outfits and everyone pristine but I would honestly choose the photos taken randomly of us playing, cuddling, genuinely smiling etc any day.