To raise a safeguarding issue with church regarding playgroup?

[Bornunderpunches]

my 2.5 year old son managed to escape the church playgroup. I was just chatting to another mum when I looked up and realised he wasn’t in the hall. He can’t have been longer than 20 seconds from when I’d last seen him and I got up and went looking for him, however being heavily pregnant I’m much slower than him at this point. all the doors were left open and when I got to him he had managed to run across the busy road just about 15 metres from the front door of the church. luckily a passer by had got to him and pulled him out of the road. Ive been going to the group for around a year and nobody in particular runs the group and we’re just left to our own devices, the church has no input whatsoever they just let us use the hall. we buy the biscuits and milk and what not, get all the toys out ourselves and put them away etc. When I told the office in a complete state of shock they were completely dismissive of the issue and said how they leave the doors open for mothers and children to easily access the group and acted like it was nothing to do with them. I just feel like such an awful mother and unsure of how to approach the situation because I don’t know whether this would be considered my fault as the church don’t have anyone supervising the group or the church’s fault for not having more in place for safeguarding in the first place.

You can't blame someone else because you didn't watch your child. Doors won't be closed and locked with every building you enter. Surely it would be impractical to keep the doors locked with people coming and going. At that age, you need to watch them constantly. There is no safeguarding issue with the church here. The safeguarding issue is your child not having a parent who keeps their eye on them.

Yes, this. You're effectively reporting yourself for safeguarding concerns!

You said yourself you were "chatting to another mum." So sounds like you weren't watching him, and I'm sorry but this sounds like it's just a playgroup. In other words, it's not a childcare provider and the parents look after and watch their own children.
They should keep the doors shut though, that's just common sense.

If I didn’t already feel shit enough I definitely do now so thanks guys. I know it was my responsibility but was just wondering if there was anything I could do to prevent it happening to others.

Your responsibility
It is not childcare

I think your DC is your responsibility. Thank goodness he is fine. It must have been very scary.
I think it’s slightly different from a different risk such as exposed electrical wiring.
It’s similar to soft play.
If there is someone to be at the doors or to open then for parents then that will be extra costs that the church probably can’t cover.
Then the playgroup could end.

Isn’t it your job to watch your child though?
You want to raise the safeguarding concern that you were too busy talking to another mum to know your child had left?
It’s quite normal for the doors to be open for people to come and go easily.

This is 100% your fault, the church aren’t in any way responsible here.

I actually think the opposite is what's wrong with the world at the moment. Casual community groups like this get shut down because of complaints, or because of worries about not having the right certifications and insurances, and the threat of legal action. Whereas if everyone just has the common sense to watch their own children we can have these nice things that do just run themselves.

But who shuts the doors and who makes sure that the doors are kept shut, it can only be the people in the playgroup, no one else is getting paid for door security. The church is not involved at all apart from generously letting people use the hall.

I don’t think many people need to be told to watch their own children.

I don't think that's the WHOLE POINT of playgroups. I bring my toddler to play groups so he can socialise with other kids, it's something to do outside of home, park, garden etc. It's different toys.

I sometimes chat to other parents. We keep an eye on the doors and windows etc but I would never think that a child escaping (or injuring themselves or another child etc) was anybody responsibility but my own.

I often don't get to have the tea and biscuits because my toddler is quite lively so we're on the move constantly.

If the lady who ran it no longer goes then it is likely that the outcome of you going to the church to complain will be that the playgroup isn’t allowed to meet there anymore.

she was probably the person on the booking/who was responsible for it.

often church halls/village halls will let things slide for a but as it can be very hard to get people to help out at playgroups but if she is not there anymore and there is a complaint they will have to take notice of the fact that the leader isn’t there any more and they will insist either on a new leader being designated (who would be responsible for safeguarding and everything else) or no more playgroup.

If nobody runs the group. Then you need to watch him the entire time

i mean that’s logical no?

Post Created in error, sorry!

Ignore the shite people are saying.

Collectively the group does have some responsibility for ensuring that users of the hall are kept safe. This includes policies around access.

I Think you feel bad because you weren’t parenting your child and you are looking for someone to blame because it’s too painful for you to realise you should be in charge of your own children

Apologies for derailing everyone.

@TheProvincialLady , I love your name! Have never met another fan of EM Delafield.

In glad your little one is safe and well. Everyone can learn from the incident, including parents and children.

There's not the same rules and regulations around playgroups where parents attend. There's no "safeguarding" rules that apply different from general health and safety.

It sounds like it would be helpful for there to be a discussion within the group and with the building managers to risk assess the use of the building with mixed age groups. It's highlighted a gap in safe use of the building rather than a safeguarding issue.

Ah but when you know that nobody runs the group anymore, and have declined to help running the group... surely you can't then decide the non-existent group is responsible for you not watching your own child?

Well you tell everyone in the group to shut the doors behind them when they go in and out, if the doors are latched open you ask the church for permission to close them during the playgroup. If that's not possible due to access to other parts of the building or fire precautions you take it in turns to stand by the doors to make sure no children go out, or you keep your children close. Not everything is someone else's problem.

My experience is admittedly from 10 years ago but.

1. I helped with a parent facilitated playgroup For this there had to be a committee because it was run by volunteers. We managed the money for hiring the hall, providing refreshments and a organised craft activity as well as set up of the session and tidy up after. We had to have insurance but it was a stay and play session and adults were made aware they were responsible for their own child. It was essentially a big play date on a hall. We couldn't block or lock doors because of fire regulations. However we had signs up reminding all parents to shut doors to the outside behind them and no children allowed in kitchen etc.. due to health and safety. Parents were reminded of this each session when they arrived. And that they were responsible for their own child at all times.

We did position the craft table so it was in view of the main entrance/ exit to keep an eye on it. Lone children were steered away from the door/ kitchen . But it was very much you are responsible for your own child during the session.

I also attended a playgroup session that was facilitated by a local church again clear messaging you were responsible for your own child and shutting doors etc behind you. But because it was hosted by church volunteers who didn't have their own children with them they did sit someone by the front door to monitor the ins/outs and also to help people who needed an extra pair of hands getting in/ out. They also staffed the tea and coffee area so could keep curious littles out. And generally had more people around to help keep an eye out for wandering children (the hall was attached to another building so several entrances/ exits.)

In your situation I would say you need to find out who hosts the playgroup and raise your concern maybe ask for reminder signs to be put up about keeping doors shut etc or maybe volunteers to help them come up with better solutions

Hmm sounds like a bit of a mess in terms of responsibilities.

You could raise it, but the group will probably close down (it should, TBH, if no one is taking responsibility).

Yes, this is right.

It’s not a group in any official capacity, if a group of mums sitting in a space with their own children.
It’s like complaining because the coffee shop door was left open and your child ran out because you weren’t paying attention.

Why not become one of the volunteers running it, so you can change things?