Did all parents hit their kids in the 1970s?

[Polythene]

I often hear that this was the norm. But was it, really?

It was common at the primary school I went to in the mid 1970s. I was smacked quite a bit, and I mostly had no idea why.

Then my siblings and I changed schools and it didn’t happen at all at the new school, despite the cane still being available.

A light slap on my bum didn’t do my brother and i any harm mentally or physically. Ok we have better methods now but I remember clear boundaries and rightly or wrongly having respect for my parents.

I was smacked every day. My younger sister was born in the 80s and wasn't

The sixties generation of teachers and parents gradually changed attitudes to corporal punishment after 1970 and in 1982 there was a european court of human rights ruling because two mothers in Scotland objected to it being done without their consent, leading to it being banned in state schools in 1986 but in practice it had widely (but not everywhere) ceased years before. In private schools it was banned much later.

I am sorry it still happened your school in the mid-70s, it’s barbaric! Thank god it eventually stopped.

Thank you. It actually isn’t something I’ve thought much about over the years tbh. But that’s because compared to other things that happened (CSA at home and later at the convent school I went to), it’s never felt like it was such a big trauma.

Obviously I’m very glad it hasn’t been part of my DDs’ school experience, though, or for any other children.

We got slapped with a ruler in primary school for pretty minor offences, so it wasn’t just parents but I don’t know anyone my age who wasn’t hit at some point.
Some of us more than others…

I remember it still would be used a lot in Scotland not widely stopped at all. even after the two mothers complained and then eventually it got banned.

I think it was dependant on your country and school district to be honest who still used it or not and how often.

i also remember two male teachers with their cloaks with the belt hidden inside after the belt was banned and them whipping it out in a rage and smacking the desk with it. They were furious it got banned. Still didn’t stop em throwing things at you either. Nasty just nasty.

On, I absolutely don't doubt it. I grew up in the 80s and my dad used to threaten us with his leather belt! I remember only one occasion when he used it on me and sister (after lots of warnings, but we pushed it lol). We thought it was normal. ....but I can't imagine being spanked by somebody else's parent! yiykes!
I think I did get a slap acoss my face from my mum once for swearing. I felt really upset as I didn't even realise what I was saying - I was just copying my older brothers. ....and she once slapped me so hard on the bum that I could see her handprint...ouch. Eventually I got too fast for her and would run up the stairs two by two with her chasing me, but would get to the bathrooom and lock myself in before she could slap me....and by the time I got out she'd have calmed down. It's crazy - we laugh about it now and she's so lovely and would never hit GCs, but I guess it was just acceptable and not frowned upon back in the day.....

Yeah, it is indeed crazy to think back on those times. Seems so different to today.

And, yes especially weird when I think back to it happening at the hand of a friend’s mum!

Glad you got through it unscathed and have a good relationship with your mum.

Smacking was the norm in my 70s childhood, though not all parents did it.
My dad would line us all up to be hit with his belt or a stick, which even back then was considered pretty vicious.

Slapped, occasionally worse. The psychological abuse was much worse. I was relieved to leave.

Mine did. None of my friends had parents who didn’t smack now I think of it. Different times!

I haven’t read the rest of the thread but I was born in 1974, my sister in 1971 and we were never smacked by our parents. Not even a so called ‘quick tap.’

Your parents must've been progressive! I was born in 74 and we did get the occassional slap but nothing overly violent thank God!

My mum was progressive about this. She hated the idea of any child being hit. Ironically my dad never hit me or my sister but he was far from progressive. He was a toxic, controlling and verbally abusive alcoholic who was also deeply racist, homophonic and misogynistic but he never hit us for some reason.

I was smacked occasionally by my parents when I was very young. It really didn't bother me, and I can honestly say had no effect, given it was in the context of an otherwise loving home. However, I think as a common practice it normalised abuse and made it much harder to call out and identify abusive parents - when you get these discussions, there are always people who recall appalling abuse, and it tends to get lumped in with being smacked occasionally for bad behaviour. I think they are different, and the impact will be different, but if you allow and normalise one, it makes the other seem more acceptable.

^I think this is absolutely right, the lines did get blurred between the two.

I think the lines were blurred for some parents too. My DM, for example, did smack us, but she also thought that my F smacked us too hard. But because the lines were blurred she didn’t intervene to stop it. (Tragically she didn’t know about the worse things that he was doing.)

She has since come to accept that smacking is always wrong, which meant that I was able to feel comfortable about her looking after my DDs.

Same here. Smacked on the legs or bum - or once, when I was 17, slapped on the face.

I don’t think there was a kid in my class who wasn’t smacked by at least one parent. At school, corporal punishment operated until the early 80s.

Youngest of 5 here, none of us were smacked

Yep same boat here, parents regularly smacked, kicked, dragged and manhandled us, mums favourite was a full force flying backhand across the face that would leave you seeing stars and throbbing cheek. The worst thing was the feeling of deep humiliation, it's stayed with me, affected my self worth and I always have a fear that I've done something wrong even now. It was a horrible way to raise children. I can't bear being close to my parents to this day because they took our trust and abused it.

No mine never did

Not sure about the 70s, I think thats when corporal punishment began to be phased out?

My folks were at school in the 50s/60s and it seemed to be pretty brutal then.

My mother has a sad story about a pupil who was "belted" regularly but whose issues likely stemmed from learning difficulties - less understood then - rather than bad behaviour.

It was a different time. Apparently you could be "belted" even for writing with your left hand (as this naturally caused you to smudge the ink from your fountain pen).

I think corporal punishment has its place, but its not in schools.

The "dunce cap" was another horrific aspect of schooling at that time.

I'm sorry to hear that. I do wonder if you mum (being so kind, intelligent and empathetic) made too many allowances for your dad :(