Did all parents hit their kids in the 1970s?

[Polythene]

I often hear that this was the norm. But was it, really?

bullshit.

One particular boy I remember growing up with his mum used to get the hoover wire and whip him with it
She can’t understand for the life of her why he died of a heroin overdose in his late 20s, I guess it was all that love and positive role modelling that she gave him

I’ve never done any of that. I’ve never removed devices. I’ve never stopped pocket money. I’ve never smacked and yet there they are university graduates holding down full-time jobs and functioning in society. It must be a miracle.

Boys aged between 6 and 19 may be given up to three strokes with a light rattan cane on the buttocks over clothing or the palm of the hand as a punishment for serious misconduct, often as a last resort.

I disagree with it but it doesn't sound hugely extreme. I suspect their results are due to other factors.

That’s so awful 😢

Actually, I’m the same. I can’t even remember punishing my sons. They were children, still learning and the years they were small were the best years for me. I laughed every day at their antics.

I think people forget that we’re meant to guide them and they’ll get it wrong sometimes.

One incident I remember was my oldest son “helping” me to wash the windows. We were in our front bedroom and it’s a big bay window. I was kneeling on one of the window sills, up high, trying to wash the outside of one of the wee high windows and he had a basin full of water behind me. I could hear splashing and stupidly said to a 3 year old, sarcastically, “you’d be as well just emptying the basin”. So he promptly did 🤣.

Some of the parents on here would have punished him for not understanding sarcasm!

I’m the same as you. Both in professional jobs, both with qualifications coming out of their ears, both with good friends and both still making me and their dad howl with laughter at their double act.

There were some evil people allowed around children in the 70s. I'd care to bet there are a huge number of Gen Xers living with unresolved childhood trauma.

My best friend when I was 9 had a stepdad who later adopted her and she had a younger sister. Years later she confessed to me she was smacked more than her younger sister, probably because he wasn’t her biological dad. That’s sad.

I was a child of the 70s and remember a bully in our class at school being told by our Mrs Thompson to drop his shorts and pants, then he was told to bend over the spare desk at the front of the class. She then proceeded to wallop his backside with a gym shoe. Although harsh, he was a menace in the class towards other kids.

What possessed people was the need to enforce discipline. No way am I in favour of corporal punishment, but the truth is that behaviour was much better in schools in the past. Obviously there were exceptions. But in general children were afraid of the teacher and much more afraid of the head teacher. That meant that teachers had control over behaviour.

I don't think childhood trauma has been eradicated , has it?

It's all tied in together, isn't it?

Agree with this. We had smacking, a few thrashes from our dad, we were his daughters for god's sake! One of us ended up over eating & then bullied at school for being fat. He had a bad temper. Yet on the other side of the coin he would absolutely do anything for us until the day he died, in terms of time, help, anything. Also did a lot of work for one particular charity. I have caught myself sounding like him and have to reign it in, but never physical.
Thankfully, the issues were resolved over the years. Sibling lost weight and no longer has an eating disorder. He.saw the error of his ways about 30 years ago & gave a massive apology to sibling who loved him very much. All was well in the whole family until he died.
Trouble is every time I read a thread about smacking and thrashing kids being the norm back then I can feel that disgust and anger at him and the memories of hitting his own daughters; so no, it doesn't really go away or get resolved 😡

My 85 year old dm went to a strict catholic all girls school. Uncle went to the boys school. She still carries the anger to this day at the caning of my uncle for something quite trivial. I sometimes wonder if some if these teachers got a kick out of the abuse given out to children, in the pretence of it being discipline.

The cane was used as punishment in my school in 70s & 80s

It was very common at home and at school. The last time either parent hit me was when I was about 14 because I retaliated. I think it made them reflect.

Yes give yourself a gold star 🌟 🙄

One of the neighbours was considered incredibly posh because she never hit her child

I can remember being put across the teachers lap To Be smacked and him having a Boner didn’t realise what it was at the time obviously

Whereas, I was a well-behaved pupil and yet I remember the teacher putting me across her knee and smacking my bottom when I accidentally broke one of her (stupid) rules (something like "don't stand in front of my desk, stand to the side"). I was 7. It wasn't the pain that bothered me, it was the humiliation of being punished for something so entirely pointless.
However, my parents both smacked me from time to time (can't remember what for) as that was what parents did back then. I was born in 1966.

My mother barely needed an excuse to slap/smack me, as I remember. I learned quite early on to walk on eggshells. My father never even raised his voice to me.

I'm a child of the 80s. My mum used to.slap, spank and on a few occasions kick me and my younger siblings. She had anger issues. Well, guess who's got anger issues and trying really hard to not pass it on?

Jesus! I'm sorry x

My mother and her siblings were never hit in the 70s, my grandparents just didn’t do it,
my Grandad was never hit either which was probably more unusual growing up in the 50s but his parents were quite intellectual striving types, older parents to an only child.
We were hit in the 90s, my mum was completely overwhelmed and I don’t condone it but I can understand how it came to it at times.

Once. A kick up the bum for swearing in front of our new neighbour. That was it. My parents were kind and loving people.
I got caned at school a few times, but that's a different story.

I got smacked on the odd occasion. It stopped well before I hit my teens.