Should we be paying for both brides?

[ohbaby70]

Friend getting married next year. Both women. They want a joint hen do abroad. They have asked us not to cover their costs because there are two of them. Maid of Honour wants us to pay anyway. Everyone else agrees. AIBU to think it’s a bit much? It’s an extra £100.

If it matters, there are 20 of us going and it’s for three nights in Greece.

I think it would be nice to do it if you can afford it. If you think about it you could have ended up with two trips for two hen nights if they hadn’t have doubled up.

How much is it costing you as is? £50 extra per bride doesnt seem alot!

Awwww if you can possibly afford it, it's lovely to cover the brides.

Congrats to them and hope you have a great time in Greece x

£1000.

I don’t know what happened to just an evening at the pub but no I don’t think they should be subbed, it’s already costing you a grand.

Since when did having a hen do morph into paying for the hen?

Many years ago when I had my hen do, I paid for the meals of all my guests and wondered if I was being stingy not paying for their drinks too!

I think if they’ve said they don’t want you all to pay you shouldn’t.
It’s annoying when other people spend your money for you. If £1000 plus spending once there is what you’ve budgeted then you don’t have the extra £100.

They said no so take them seriously. You are already gifting them your presence, time and expenses.

Normally I would say no but if it's LGBT then yes you should pay to show support for the community at this time

It's already a huge expense. I don't think you should pay. If the group reallllllly want to, pay half of each (the equivalent of one bride).

That's so expensive! £1000 per person? No wonder they don't want you to cover theirs. That's surely above the average hen budget? Last one I went to was a weekend in a lodge for £150pp (also two brides). Is it quite normal to spend so much in your friendship group? If not I would say it's a bit much to pay for theirs also.

Hilarious 🤣

How could there be two brides without it being LGBT? What a ridiculous answer. What if both brides are loaded and their friends not?

I personally wouldn't its already a Huge amount.

If you can’t afford to pay it then say so. I’d talk to the brides tbh because they’ve already said they don’t want everyone to pay, it’s the maid of honour that’s pushed it

No I wouldn’t cover when its a lot extra each and they asked you not to.

Good idea but I'm another (old) person who doesn't know why paying for the brides started to be a thing.

What? I wouldn’t pay for a straight couple to go on holiday! Paying for the hen is when it’s a meal out. Not a whole holiday FFS.

Is that £1000 or £500 per person for 3 nights?? hen nights are getting silly now, even if it’s £500 plus spending £, it’s too much.

Who the heck pays £1,000 for a hen do

I'm just saying what I would do. I'd be worried if I didn't pay then they might think I'm homophobic. You do whatever you want to do

I don’t know if it’s. A regional thing but I’d never heard of covering the Hen’s cost before coming on MN.

😂

Do the brides know how much this is costing everyone?

If I was one of the brides I would be mortified that my hen do was costing that much. Thank god they didn't want separate ones

Snort. The OP and their friends are all travelling to Greece with them to celebrate them getting married. In what way could they possibly be viewed as 'unsupportive'?