Dd doesn't want to go back to school after giving birth

[LighterDays]

Reposting from Education forum in hopes to get more advice/experiences

You might remember me from my other threads but I've name changed again as I've posted some outing things.

My DD is 15 and she gave birth 2 nearly 3 weeks ago. She is supposed to be in year 10 and attended school up until Christmas, she had a horrible few weeks with her ex and his friends bullying her, name calling and he’d wait outside her classes to try and talk to her when she told him she didn't want to talk to him and it was quite intimidating to her. School weren't very supportive about this and it caused her a lot of stress so she didn't go in the last week or 2 but he isn't at the school now

Anyway after Christmas she was on what would probably be maternity leave, she studied at home though but since baby has been here she obviously hasn't. We never chatted about when she’d go back with the school or anything they just said let them know and keep them updated

She has said now she doesn't want to go back after Easter (he will only be 8 or 9 weeks old so I don't really blame her) so I don't think she will go back until September and even then she is sorta worried about leaving him from like 7:45 am (she left this time to get the bus) until nearly 4pm at 7 months but I guess that's how all parents feel

I'm just worried about how behind she will be in her GCSE year as she will have missed so much. I know 14+ colleges are a thing, I don't know if there are any locally but it would also help if it were more flexible rather than 8:30-3 days 5 days a week. I'd be caring for him most likely as that was agreed and I don't mind I just want her to do well.

If you/your dc have any experience of these colleges can you tell me know what its like? Also any advice in general would be appreciated

Your daughter was in a school that apparently did nothing to prevent or punish bullying and harassment while she was in a very vulnerable state. Then she gave birth and is still settling down, with broken sleep, hormonal adjustment, and possibly even the baby blues/ pnd, with the trauma from the abusive ex still affecting her.

She could use some therapy to get over all of the relationship issues - the ex was clearly abusive and there may well be elements of the relationship, including consent to sex and the pregnancy that may need to be talked about.

Please give her time. She has been through so much at such a young age.

She might like to give Women's Aid a call to see if she can get a recommendation for a therapist.

School can wait until she has regained her physical strength and moved on from the relationship.

I can understand your desire to repair the relationship, but this girl is involved with an abuser, and you need to do whatever it takes to get her out of his clutches.

Please call Women's Aid.

The mother is 15. 15! She is just a child herself. Give her a bloody break. Of course she needs to provide for herself and her child. But what 15, 16, 17, 18 year old is actually fully supporting themselves? With or without a baby in tow: very few. And she now has a baby in tow. Her trajectory is now going to be different from her peers. Esp since it appeared even before baby that school wasn’t going well for her. You can’t just apply the same frame work of school to every child and every situation. No one is saying she shouldn’t get qualifications but forcing her back to an environment that isn’t suitable for her in the first place, when she is exhausted, is going to end in failure, lack of qualifications and poor earning potential in her 20s rather than thinking outside the box and a path that sets her up to succeed