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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

No, Dubai.. we’re not jealous. We’re just exhausted by the algorithm shoving endless, braggy content down our feeds during what might be the start of a world war, one that already involves British people on the ground.

549 replies

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 06:51

I’m venting here, as a former expat sick of being pushed content from influencers who know nothing about the realities of living there under terms that don’t involve government cash to push a blindfolded, tone deaf narrative.

Dubai is the ultimate symbol of moral compromise, a glossy façade masking hypocrisy. Nowhere else do you see people who once mocked or feared Muslims flocking to Muslim lands to live comfortably off their wealth.

Certain professions thrive in their own sheltered bubbles, teachers, for example, rarely look beyond their privileged expat circles.

Parents who gush about loving their children casually employ underpaid nannies, often Filipina women who’ve left their own children behind. The usual defence? “She earns more here than back home.” Conveniently ignoring the exploitative system that brought her there. Hypocrisy in full view.

In a supposedly Muslim state, the same rules of faith vanish when profit or expat comfort is at stake. Alcohol flows freely, prostitution thrives, gambling exists, pork is sold, and dogs fill parks, all justified under the umbrella of “keeping expats happy.”

Many defend the government’s heavy control as if to prove their choice to stay is right. They need that illusion. Meanwhile, the state ensures expats feel “safe” because their satisfaction is profitable.

What influencers call “hate” toward Dubai isn’t jealousy. It’s frustration, frustration at how proudly expats flaunt a lifestyle while belittling their home countries, still benefiting from UK systems without paying a penny of tax. It’s tone-deafness wrapped in sunshine and skyline filters.

I know because I lived there. I arrived with good intentions to work hard, save, go home. But within a few years, I was buried in credit card debt, battling an eating disorder, and clinging to delusions just to survive mentally.

It’s easy to adopt the spin/ the narrative of safety, success, and superiority, because the system is designed to make you believe it.

People are tired of the influencer nonsense: clickbait, fake engagement, pretentious “Dubai life” hype. Every smug clip of a sunset or a skyline feels like rubbing salt in collective anxiety, especially while the UK faces uncertainty, fear, and political messes. The contrast feels cruel.

Dubai isn’t a real place, it’s a business model. A well-oiled corporation with immaculate branding and impeccable control over perception. It’s proof that humans will do almost anything for money.

They’ll mute moral conflict, ignore exploitation, and call it “success.”

Expats boast about how “safe” Dubai is compared to the UK, but that’s a narrow kind of safety, street-level safety, not emotional, financial, or existential safety. Is your job secure? Is your mental health stable? Are your rights protected? Safety for whom, the western professionals or the migrant workers living without basic freedoms?

In my view most expats won’t return home. Some can’t afford to. Debt, or the fear of losing status keep them trapped. Others left with problems they can’t face back in the UK. Many still defend Dubai fervently because admitting the truth would unravel years of self-justification.

It’s not far from a cult, everyone repeating the same comforting lines while ignoring what’s right in front of them.

I spent just over three years there. My profession wasn’t part of a protected bubble, so I met people from all walks of life. That distance gave me perspective. I changed, and yes, I too once repeated the same scripted defence to friends back home. It was easier to mask my unhappiness than face it.

Rant over.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
crossedlines · 06/03/2026 08:19

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 08:13

I was enticed and recruited to work out there under the same pretences as many others. Which is why I am entitled to
comment and vent my frustrated perspective. For whatever reason, you’re choosing to ignore or deny the very real issues that exist.

No, I’m not ignoring them. Stop shutting people down by saying this - it’s an ignorant response.

i am making the point that many of us would never in a million years live and work in Dubai precisely because we know the reality and won’t participate in it. You did.

Annana5 · 06/03/2026 08:20

Even though living in Dubai is abhorrent on a human rights and environmental level I get that people can do what they like. Why I don’t get or agree with is British taxpayers funding flights home in crisis or paying for benefits, NHS care or pensions in the future on those who have not paid UK taxes.

This crisis has highlighted how this issue needs to be looked at.

NOTANUM · 06/03/2026 08:20

I’m totally fine with people deciding to move to these countries as tax exiles but having visited it wouldn’t be for me. I do object to them retiring to the UK not having contributed tax during their working lives, when their host country no longer wants them.

However our assistance to repatriate should be limited to those who are on holidays or were transiting through when war broke out, and the vulnerable. Western residents knew the risks, took the free tax regime and tacitly accepted the trade-offs that come with that.

JaneFondue · 06/03/2026 08:21

I don't think you should be comparing yourself to desperate Indian and Filipino workers. No British person should.

NamechangeRugby · 06/03/2026 08:22

Myskyscolour · 06/03/2026 07:30

I arrived with good intentions to work hard, save, go home What went wrong, OP?
Many people move there with this mindset, and on paper it makes sense, but I might be missing something. Is it that people are also tempted to spend a lot and at the end you don’t manage to save?

Yes, this bit I an not so familiar with - genuinely interested. Thanks Op.

Wiresring · 06/03/2026 08:22

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 07:12

And we’re sick of the constant, ‘Haha, look at us, we don’t have to live in the UK anymore! Check out my view. Look how amazing our government is at intercepting bombs unlike the useless and unsafe UK. We know our government is terrible, which only adds to our anxiety.

If you’re an expat out there, caught in the middle of all this tension, I’m surprised you’re not tired of those influencers too. Some people are showing genuine concern about a global crisis, while they’re still busy flexing for clicks.

I swear I have never seen any of this in my feeds. Until this week I didn't even know influencers in Dubai were a thing.

What I did/do know about it was that people who go/have been always tell you about the tax benefits first, and then try to find something positive about the lifestyle, as you say, skirting over the awful human rights, the slave labour and a climate you can't actually live in.

I've seen the first flight back seems to have carried more "residents" than holiday makers, presumably because they were more able to get themselves to the border. That seems appalling to me, what with them being so smug about avoiding UK tax.

As for too many posts about Dubai, I found OP's post interesting, and it explains much to me. Despite my limited knowledge, I've always suspect it was a bit of a house of cards. Obviously those "enjoying" the lifestyle, or the state, can't afford for that message to get out.

Naunet · 06/03/2026 08:23

mrbluebirdonmyshoulder · 06/03/2026 07:20

I'm also stunned at the amount of repressed hatred there is towards Dubai influlencers.

OP - I have to ask - did you compose that original post yourself?

Disagreement isnt 'hate'.

I've never understood the appeal of dubai, its too hot, appalling human rights, vapid and shallow, very controlled. Personally nature, beautiful landscapes, history and culture are what appeal to me, not designer shopping and Instagram chocolate. So yes, I do think people who bang on about it, are probably shallow and too invested in showing off on social media. That's not hate, its just the impression they give off.

SouthernNights59 · 06/03/2026 08:24

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Ha, ha - you got your insane predictable message in just before I edited my post! Honestly, repeating the same thing to all posters just makes you look ignorant - and unhinged.

I think it's high time I found some more interesting posts to read, ones written by actual adults.

Heronwatcher · 06/03/2026 08:25

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 08:18

I don’t follow influencers. I never have. The content is pushed to my feed.

Have you explained why you can’t just come off your phone for a couple of hours (or better still a week) and just watch the TV/ listen to the radio instead.

Or sorry is that “ignorant” too….

GrinchPink · 06/03/2026 08:26

SecretSwirrel · 06/03/2026 07:15

Eye opening post. I've never reslly understood why anyone would want to go there, let alone live there.

It all seems like shallow, fancy-pants, new money.

And I’ll never understand why people rush off to Butlins or Benidorm. Flying halfway across Europe/driving for hours sometimes just to sit on plastic chairs in a run-down pub that looks like a Conservative club from the 80s, drinking warm lager , eating crisps and the exact same atmosphere you could get five minutes from home.

dottiehens · 06/03/2026 08:27

Dubai gets too much space. Tacky place for tacky people.

Heronwatcher · 06/03/2026 08:27

Oh and BTW your original post sounded like AI and your subsequent retorts sound like they were written by a 12 yr old after too much caffeine. If you were looking for a career in journalism or creative writing I’d turn your sights elsewhere.

SpaceRaccoon · 06/03/2026 08:29

Fucking hell Dubai really does live head free in people's heads on MN.

Somersetbaker · 06/03/2026 08:30

GrinchPink · 06/03/2026 08:26

And I’ll never understand why people rush off to Butlins or Benidorm. Flying halfway across Europe/driving for hours sometimes just to sit on plastic chairs in a run-down pub that looks like a Conservative club from the 80s, drinking warm lager , eating crisps and the exact same atmosphere you could get five minutes from home.

Edited

and when you finally reach the half-built ruin, there's no water in the bog, only a lizard in the bidet,Campell's cream of mushroom soup is the first item on a ,menu of international cuisine and you can't even get a pint of Watney's Red Barrel

Naunet · 06/03/2026 08:31

GrinchPink · 06/03/2026 08:26

And I’ll never understand why people rush off to Butlins or Benidorm. Flying halfway across Europe/driving for hours sometimes just to sit on plastic chairs in a run-down pub that looks like a Conservative club from the 80s, drinking warm lager , eating crisps and the exact same atmosphere you could get five minutes from home.

Edited

I'm sure most of us would agree. Luckily, they aren't the only 2 options.

It's interesting how personally some people take criticism of Dubai though, you're right op, it does come across as cult like.

Usernamenotfound1 · 06/03/2026 08:31

“Britain is shit, too much immigration, too many Muslims”. I’m going to fuck off to Dubai. The irony is not lost.

I lived in south Africa during apartheid. Some of the Dubai rhetoric reminds me very strongly of it. Having nanny’s, housekeepers etc and living a luxury lifestyle at the expense of others. But they love working for me, I treat them well. They get paid well and can send money back to their families! They’d be living in poverty if it wasn’t for me giving them this lovely job! My kids are like her own!

no thought to her actual own kids with no mother.

the race hierarchy too.

I now work with asylum seekers in the UK. I have met many, many nanny’s brought over here by families- but she loves working for us! We’ve brought her on holiday! She’d never get any of this is it wasn’t for us!

then you ask where her passport is. In our safe. Does she have access to it? No. Ever? No. We keep it safe and she only ever travels with us.

Coffeeishot · 06/03/2026 08:33

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 08:00

There are hundreds of thousands of British nationals living in Dubai, the UAE has been a main target so far. You can’t be that ignorant.

Why are you watching internet videos of individuals if it isn't morbid fascination

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 08:34

SouthernNights59 · 06/03/2026 08:18

There is not a world war unfolding in front of your eyes, and even if there was can't you read newspapers, watch the TV news, listen to the radio - you know, like people used to do, and many of us continue to do. You don't need to rely on social media and/or influencers at all.

You need to get a grip - and anyway, why are you banging on about Dubai, they didn't start this war you are so concerned about. Oh, and maybe stop calling posters ignorant - you aren't some superior being just because you think you are!

Edited

Okay, let me explain why I think you sound ignorant. You’re saying there isn’t a world war unfolding before our eyes, but to me, that shows a real lack of awareness about how serious things have become globally.

I don’t want to rely solely on mainstream media because I don’t trust it, I was hoping to find more truthful perspectives from alternative sources. I don’t follow influencers, but social media algorithms push that kind of content onto my feed regardless.

In fact, if I were to blindly believe everything the BBC reports, I’d probably be even angrier, because much of it seems exaggerated or distorted from what I’ve gathered.

So really, do I need to “get a grip,” or do you need to open your eyes?

As for why I keep bringing up Dubai, it’s because I’ve actually lived there and have firsthand experience. The UAE has been a focal point recently, and with so many Brits living there, I’m genuinely concerned about where things are heading.

And finally, you accuse me of thinking I’m some “superior being” just because I have an informed opinion. Maybe instead, you should take a closer look at your own biases.

OP posts:
Wiresring · 06/03/2026 08:34

Naunet · 06/03/2026 08:31

I'm sure most of us would agree. Luckily, they aren't the only 2 options.

It's interesting how personally some people take criticism of Dubai though, you're right op, it does come across as cult like.

Yes, this. Don't you dare criticise Dubai, just because you're too stupid to live properly elsewhere. Also, you're very stupid if you think everyone who has questions about Dubai only ever goes to Benidorm.

Coffeeishot · 06/03/2026 08:36

@Usernamenotfound1 maybe the op should look closer too home at unfair conditions..

LadyKenya · 06/03/2026 08:36

Strawberryfruitstarburst · 06/03/2026 07:17

You need to get off social media or delete your cookies and refresh your algorithm.

”We” are not all being bombarded with this rhetoric.

This. I manage to avoid this type of content.

Damdamdamdaaaam · 06/03/2026 08:38

What a ridiculous whinge.
""it's pushed on my feed" - "actually I search for it"
Look, didn't work for you, worked for others.

I am forever fascinated by the amount of hate Dubai (I assume other emirates are fine😂) gets on here.
"but the rights" yeah, like no other popular destination has same issues.....

Passaggressfedup · 06/03/2026 08:40

So can you explain why it took 3 years and for things to go badly for you to open your eyes to it all? Surely all you said would gav been obvious after 6 months, maybe a year.... but 3 years.... Why didnt you love back to the UK sooner if it was such a horrible place?

EasternStandard · 06/03/2026 08:40

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 08:18

I don’t follow influencers. I never have. The content is pushed to my feed.

I don’t get the content, stop engaging with it in any way, look at other stuff and your feed will show you that instead.

Jlom · 06/03/2026 08:43

You sound really judgemental. I know quite a few people who work/ have worked there. They are there for work and have mixed feelings. It has got a reputation for being a bit boring and very indoorsy due to the heat.

Influencers are just marketing people by another name. They are the modern equivalent of a holiday brochure.