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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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No, Dubai.. we’re not jealous. We’re just exhausted by the algorithm shoving endless, braggy content down our feeds during what might be the start of a world war, one that already involves British people on the ground.

549 replies

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 06:51

I’m venting here, as a former expat sick of being pushed content from influencers who know nothing about the realities of living there under terms that don’t involve government cash to push a blindfolded, tone deaf narrative.

Dubai is the ultimate symbol of moral compromise, a glossy façade masking hypocrisy. Nowhere else do you see people who once mocked or feared Muslims flocking to Muslim lands to live comfortably off their wealth.

Certain professions thrive in their own sheltered bubbles, teachers, for example, rarely look beyond their privileged expat circles.

Parents who gush about loving their children casually employ underpaid nannies, often Filipina women who’ve left their own children behind. The usual defence? “She earns more here than back home.” Conveniently ignoring the exploitative system that brought her there. Hypocrisy in full view.

In a supposedly Muslim state, the same rules of faith vanish when profit or expat comfort is at stake. Alcohol flows freely, prostitution thrives, gambling exists, pork is sold, and dogs fill parks, all justified under the umbrella of “keeping expats happy.”

Many defend the government’s heavy control as if to prove their choice to stay is right. They need that illusion. Meanwhile, the state ensures expats feel “safe” because their satisfaction is profitable.

What influencers call “hate” toward Dubai isn’t jealousy. It’s frustration, frustration at how proudly expats flaunt a lifestyle while belittling their home countries, still benefiting from UK systems without paying a penny of tax. It’s tone-deafness wrapped in sunshine and skyline filters.

I know because I lived there. I arrived with good intentions to work hard, save, go home. But within a few years, I was buried in credit card debt, battling an eating disorder, and clinging to delusions just to survive mentally.

It’s easy to adopt the spin/ the narrative of safety, success, and superiority, because the system is designed to make you believe it.

People are tired of the influencer nonsense: clickbait, fake engagement, pretentious “Dubai life” hype. Every smug clip of a sunset or a skyline feels like rubbing salt in collective anxiety, especially while the UK faces uncertainty, fear, and political messes. The contrast feels cruel.

Dubai isn’t a real place, it’s a business model. A well-oiled corporation with immaculate branding and impeccable control over perception. It’s proof that humans will do almost anything for money.

They’ll mute moral conflict, ignore exploitation, and call it “success.”

Expats boast about how “safe” Dubai is compared to the UK, but that’s a narrow kind of safety, street-level safety, not emotional, financial, or existential safety. Is your job secure? Is your mental health stable? Are your rights protected? Safety for whom, the western professionals or the migrant workers living without basic freedoms?

In my view most expats won’t return home. Some can’t afford to. Debt, or the fear of losing status keep them trapped. Others left with problems they can’t face back in the UK. Many still defend Dubai fervently because admitting the truth would unravel years of self-justification.

It’s not far from a cult, everyone repeating the same comforting lines while ignoring what’s right in front of them.

I spent just over three years there. My profession wasn’t part of a protected bubble, so I met people from all walks of life. That distance gave me perspective. I changed, and yes, I too once repeated the same scripted defence to friends back home. It was easier to mask my unhappiness than face it.

Rant over.

OP posts:
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5
Myskyscolour · 06/03/2026 07:30

I arrived with good intentions to work hard, save, go home What went wrong, OP?
Many people move there with this mindset, and on paper it makes sense, but I might be missing something. Is it that people are also tempted to spend a lot and at the end you don’t manage to save?

PheasantandAstronomers · 06/03/2026 07:31

BollyMolly · 06/03/2026 07:24

I know quite a few people who worked out there for a few years then came back to the UK to buy a house with the savings they’d never have been able to accrue if they’d stayed in the UK. All teachers and people in construction.

You might have needed up in debt and with poor mental health, but many people had positive opportunities thanks to Dubai that weren’t available to them here. I realise there is an underworld of exploitation, but that exists in most countries to some extent. Dubai just gets criticised more because it’s a Muslim state.

That’s not the case. It gets criticised more because it’s a dictatorship run by a particularly pernicious family, which, needing tourism and foreign workers because it has no oil compared to Abu Dhabi, owes its reputation for safety and luxury to a cadre of influencers who are essentially paid to spin a particular narrative.

No, Dubai.. we’re not jealous. We’re just exhausted by the algorithm shoving endless, braggy content down our feeds during what might be the start of a world war, one that already involves British people on the ground.
surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 07:33

I can’t just switch my algorithm and PP’s are suggesting, when the whole reason I’m on there is to research Dubai and understand what’s happening, to see how things might escalate. It’s not just about social media; it’s mainstream media and other news sources too.

That ‘switch your algorithm and pretend it’s not there’ attitude is the same as turning a blind eye in real life. If you don’t see it, it’s as if it doesn’t exist.

OP posts:
Passaggressfedup · 06/03/2026 07:34

Three years is a long time to come to this conclusion. Maybe you'd still be there enjoying that life if it hadn't go pear shape for you.

Whatafustercluck · 06/03/2026 07:34

Not a fan then, op?

You write very well, I enjoyed reading your post.

I don't care much for Dubai, it's not my kind of place at all - either as a residence or a holiday destination. You make a good point about the tax. Perhaps they can contribute to their repatriation with the money they've saved.

WhereIsMyLight · 06/03/2026 07:38

I have been fed some of the videos OP mentions. I’m not an expat and have never been an expat. My friends aren’t expats either, I know maybe one person on my FB and one on LinkedIn who has done the Dubai expat thing, although the one on FB came back. So the algorithm definitely is driving this content.

One I saw was sipping champagne as missiles were intercepted. It’s obviously ridiculous to be in an active war, sipping champagne but it does appeal to those of a certain mindset.

It’s not bothering me personally because Dubai has never been attractive to me. Even as a holiday. I’m pissed off with the expats that went to Dubai for low taxes but still expect the government to come save them now they are in an active war zone. I’m concerned about the algorithm is pushing at a wider level. Still creating this picture that Dubai is safe and who does this benefit.

Coffeeishot · 06/03/2026 07:39

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 07:33

I can’t just switch my algorithm and PP’s are suggesting, when the whole reason I’m on there is to research Dubai and understand what’s happening, to see how things might escalate. It’s not just about social media; it’s mainstream media and other news sources too.

That ‘switch your algorithm and pretend it’s not there’ attitude is the same as turning a blind eye in real life. If you don’t see it, it’s as if it doesn’t exist.

You hate Dubai but can't stop looking at influencers etc in Dubai ? Of course you can switch your algorythim you just don't want to.

Flamingojune · 06/03/2026 07:40

Fairyliz · 06/03/2026 07:19

Blimey op step away from the internet and go for a nice walk and get a bit of fresh air, it’s stopped raining in the Uk which is more important to most of us living here. Generally most of us don’t give a passing thought to Dubai which might be unreasonable but we are not so overwrought as you appear to be.

Patronising much. How about you stop tryng to shut down discussion. Im interested in what op has to say

crossedlines · 06/03/2026 07:41

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 07:33

I can’t just switch my algorithm and PP’s are suggesting, when the whole reason I’m on there is to research Dubai and understand what’s happening, to see how things might escalate. It’s not just about social media; it’s mainstream media and other news sources too.

That ‘switch your algorithm and pretend it’s not there’ attitude is the same as turning a blind eye in real life. If you don’t see it, it’s as if it doesn’t exist.

But many of us know the reality of Dubai and would never dream of going there. You seem intent on - I dunno - spreading the word? And the more time you spend writing about it, the more you’re going to see on your socials. If it’s exhausting you and the whole experience of working in Dubai has left you so mentally and financially scarred, it sounds like it would be best to step away from your social media. That’s not the same as ignoring a hugely important world issue. Like I say, many of us are completely aware of the reality without needing to visit Dubai or have influencers popping up every two minutes on our socials.

gamerchick · 06/03/2026 07:43

I get very little influencer crap in my algorithm full.stop.

Hide it as it comes and don't watch any of it and it'll filter out.

If you watch it and get annoyed, then that's on you.

nomas · 06/03/2026 07:43

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 07:12

And we’re sick of the constant, ‘Haha, look at us, we don’t have to live in the UK anymore! Check out my view. Look how amazing our government is at intercepting bombs unlike the useless and unsafe UK. We know our government is terrible, which only adds to our anxiety.

If you’re an expat out there, caught in the middle of all this tension, I’m surprised you’re not tired of those influencers too. Some people are showing genuine concern about a global crisis, while they’re still busy flexing for clicks.

I literally never see these Dubai videos and I’m on SM a lot.

If they’re coming up so frequently on your insta or tiktok or snap it’s because you are either searching for videos or clicking on them so much that your algorithm is feeding your addiction.

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 07:43

Coffeeishot · 06/03/2026 07:39

You hate Dubai but can't stop looking at influencers etc in Dubai ? Of course you can switch your algorythim you just don't want to.

How am I supposed to switch my algorithm to exclude Dubai content when I’m genuinely curious about what’s happening there? I can’t block Dubai and then actively search for it without being presented with more l, or can I? Can you explain how that’s supposed to work?

OP posts:
Oasl · 06/03/2026 07:44

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 07:33

I can’t just switch my algorithm and PP’s are suggesting, when the whole reason I’m on there is to research Dubai and understand what’s happening, to see how things might escalate. It’s not just about social media; it’s mainstream media and other news sources too.

That ‘switch your algorithm and pretend it’s not there’ attitude is the same as turning a blind eye in real life. If you don’t see it, it’s as if it doesn’t exist.

Then stop complaining you’re choosing to “research” on social media, you’re choosing to watch pointless bragging content.

Lugol · 06/03/2026 07:44

The place is corrupt as fuck.

A friend of mine ended up being set up by a business contact who left drug paraphenalia in my friend's house and then called the police.

Friend was sentenced to 20 years in prison for that.

Everyone seems to get 20 years in prison no matter what they have done.
Prison over there is as one might expect, they give prisoners just enough bread and water to survive and anything else must come from visitors but if you don't get any visitors you're on your own. You can imagine what it's like trying to survive with all those starving men. He was terrified.

He is home now in the UK because he was able to buy his way out of prison.

I'd never ever go there.

Strawberryfruitstarburst · 06/03/2026 07:45

It’s not turning a blind eye, the internet is never ending and is designed to suck you in to make money.

You can be sucked into absolutely any topic to keep the internet ticking over. Eating disorders, plastic surgery, war, Taylor Swift, soft porn, abandoned animals of the world, anything!!!

I clicked on a story about an animal dying in a zoo once and my Facebook continued to show me every single story about a zoo animals dying across the world, it happens a lot, who knew!

If a topic is stressing you out, you have to take personal action to distance yourself from it.

nomas · 06/03/2026 07:46

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 07:43

How am I supposed to switch my algorithm to exclude Dubai content when I’m genuinely curious about what’s happening there? I can’t block Dubai and then actively search for it without being presented with more l, or can I? Can you explain how that’s supposed to work?

What are you curious about?

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 07:46

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

nomas · 06/03/2026 07:47

Flamingojune · 06/03/2026 07:40

Patronising much. How about you stop tryng to shut down discussion. Im interested in what op has to say

It was good advice. Time to step away from the internet for a bit.

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 07:47

nomas · 06/03/2026 07:46

What are you curious about?

Is that a serious question?

OP posts:
Flamingojune · 06/03/2026 07:47

The bbc podcast 'death in dubai' is a eye opening listen about the awful underbelly of the place

Lordofmyflies · 06/03/2026 07:48

You seem very angry OP! It makes me wonder why the vested interest in spreading your opinion of a place? Others, including myself, have travelled to Dubai along with other Middle East countries...some parts of it are amazing, others not so. But I dont feel the need to let it eat me up. Turn off social media, go for a walk and look at what is around you locally that you can have an influence over.

nomas · 06/03/2026 07:48

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 07:47

Is that a serious question?

Yes?

Thejugglestruggle · 06/03/2026 07:48

I agree. But people don't like a mirror held up to their own morality. I watched a documentary about the 100,000s of mostly South Asian workers who keep this plastic paradise afloat. It's vile.

tenrillingtonplace · 06/03/2026 07:48

My algoritms give me puppies, kittens, horses, crochet, knitting and a weird animatronic dinosaur. It's very therapeutic It's quite easy - click 'block', 'unfollow' or 'not interested' to the Dubai posts.

Coffeeishot · 06/03/2026 07:49

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 07:43

How am I supposed to switch my algorithm to exclude Dubai content when I’m genuinely curious about what’s happening there? I can’t block Dubai and then actively search for it without being presented with more l, or can I? Can you explain how that’s supposed to work?

You watch it because you like it you are morbidly fascinated you are not "researching." You are watching incase you miss soms tiktoker drama,