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AIBU?

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No, Dubai.. we’re not jealous. We’re just exhausted by the algorithm shoving endless, braggy content down our feeds during what might be the start of a world war, one that already involves British people on the ground.

549 replies

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 06:51

I’m venting here, as a former expat sick of being pushed content from influencers who know nothing about the realities of living there under terms that don’t involve government cash to push a blindfolded, tone deaf narrative.

Dubai is the ultimate symbol of moral compromise, a glossy façade masking hypocrisy. Nowhere else do you see people who once mocked or feared Muslims flocking to Muslim lands to live comfortably off their wealth.

Certain professions thrive in their own sheltered bubbles, teachers, for example, rarely look beyond their privileged expat circles.

Parents who gush about loving their children casually employ underpaid nannies, often Filipina women who’ve left their own children behind. The usual defence? “She earns more here than back home.” Conveniently ignoring the exploitative system that brought her there. Hypocrisy in full view.

In a supposedly Muslim state, the same rules of faith vanish when profit or expat comfort is at stake. Alcohol flows freely, prostitution thrives, gambling exists, pork is sold, and dogs fill parks, all justified under the umbrella of “keeping expats happy.”

Many defend the government’s heavy control as if to prove their choice to stay is right. They need that illusion. Meanwhile, the state ensures expats feel “safe” because their satisfaction is profitable.

What influencers call “hate” toward Dubai isn’t jealousy. It’s frustration, frustration at how proudly expats flaunt a lifestyle while belittling their home countries, still benefiting from UK systems without paying a penny of tax. It’s tone-deafness wrapped in sunshine and skyline filters.

I know because I lived there. I arrived with good intentions to work hard, save, go home. But within a few years, I was buried in credit card debt, battling an eating disorder, and clinging to delusions just to survive mentally.

It’s easy to adopt the spin/ the narrative of safety, success, and superiority, because the system is designed to make you believe it.

People are tired of the influencer nonsense: clickbait, fake engagement, pretentious “Dubai life” hype. Every smug clip of a sunset or a skyline feels like rubbing salt in collective anxiety, especially while the UK faces uncertainty, fear, and political messes. The contrast feels cruel.

Dubai isn’t a real place, it’s a business model. A well-oiled corporation with immaculate branding and impeccable control over perception. It’s proof that humans will do almost anything for money.

They’ll mute moral conflict, ignore exploitation, and call it “success.”

Expats boast about how “safe” Dubai is compared to the UK, but that’s a narrow kind of safety, street-level safety, not emotional, financial, or existential safety. Is your job secure? Is your mental health stable? Are your rights protected? Safety for whom, the western professionals or the migrant workers living without basic freedoms?

In my view most expats won’t return home. Some can’t afford to. Debt, or the fear of losing status keep them trapped. Others left with problems they can’t face back in the UK. Many still defend Dubai fervently because admitting the truth would unravel years of self-justification.

It’s not far from a cult, everyone repeating the same comforting lines while ignoring what’s right in front of them.

I spent just over three years there. My profession wasn’t part of a protected bubble, so I met people from all walks of life. That distance gave me perspective. I changed, and yes, I too once repeated the same scripted defence to friends back home. It was easier to mask my unhappiness than face it.

Rant over.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 20:02

crossedlines · 06/03/2026 19:52

You accused me of ‘ignoring or denying’ the ‘very real issues’ which exist. 08:13 post this morning.

Where have I denied the issues? I’ve repeatedly pointed them out. You just seem bizarrely angry with people who do their research and engage with global issues better than you did. Not all of us need to go and work in Dubai for 3 years to try to get rich quick to realise what an awful place it is.

Well, aren’t you just superior for knowing it all before experiencing it like I did, as a young, impressionable woman who barely knew the world back then? Congratulations to you. Shame on me… Wow.

OP posts:
EvieBB · 06/03/2026 20:03

PeonyPatch · 06/03/2026 07:23

Dubai isn’t a real place, it’s a business model. A well-oiled corporation with immaculate branding and impeccable control over perception. It’s proof that humans will do almost anything for money.

bang on… also, you write so well!!

Sounds like it's been copied from an article 🤔

crossedlines · 06/03/2026 20:08

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 20:02

Well, aren’t you just superior for knowing it all before experiencing it like I did, as a young, impressionable woman who barely knew the world back then? Congratulations to you. Shame on me… Wow.

No, I never said I was superior. They’re your words because you can’t admit you’ve been rude and unpleasant to people on here.

(and you don’t need to ‘know it all’ to know how awful Dubai is. We’ve all been young, it doesn’t make us all chase money in a morally bankrupt place.)

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 20:14

EvieBB · 06/03/2026 20:03

Sounds like it's been copied from an article 🤔

Thanks, I’ll take that. I’d link my writing, but I can only imagine the lengths you delightful bunch would go to in tearing me apart. I’ve already been accused of being AI, and when that didn’t stick, told my writing’s terrible and I should find another career.

OP posts:
Janblues28 · 06/03/2026 20:15

Argh yes the Dubai influencers are insufferable. There's no way I'd ever go. It's all those chavvy thick as s**t finance bros and influencer wannabes that put me off. I can't think of anywhere worse.
Also don't think any of them still there have really considered what happens when the interceptors run out. Which they will. Iran has more drones than UAE has interceptors by a long way - if I was there I'd be trying to leave ASAP.

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 20:16

crossedlines · 06/03/2026 20:08

No, I never said I was superior. They’re your words because you can’t admit you’ve been rude and unpleasant to people on here.

(and you don’t need to ‘know it all’ to know how awful Dubai is. We’ve all been young, it doesn’t make us all chase money in a morally bankrupt place.)

Read back what you’ve written in your responses. You’re rude, and you’re unpleasant.

OP posts:
PolkaDotPorridge · 06/03/2026 20:20

Agreed. It’s a soulless shit hole. I’ve lived abroad, in far nicer places than Dubai. It makes me laugh how they assume it’s jealousy. It’s certainly not.

crossedlines · 06/03/2026 20:22

nomas · 06/03/2026 19:46

You repeatedly harangued people as ignorant and not real. Not sure why you’re minimising it now.

And when the minimising doesn’t cut it, resorts to name calling like a whiny 12 year old kid!

Beachtastic · 06/03/2026 20:53

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 18:54

And I’m telling you, it’s not AI. You’re putting an incredible amount of energy into trying to shoot me down, even though you don’t seem to know what an influencer actually is, and you’ve never lived in Dubai. You’re really going out of your way to discredit my reality.

I've worked as an editor for >30 years, OP, and your writing does not look like AI to me. AI has certain idiosyncratic style elements that are absent from your posts here. You simply write with natural eloquence, and some people assume that must be artificial nowadays. Take it as a back-handed compliment 😉

Ferdyandthegingerone · 06/03/2026 21:42

surelycantjustbeme · 06/03/2026 19:29

@Ferdyandthegingerone @nomas

Based on your responses, it seems you have no compassion for a young, impressionable woman who was lured to a foreign country under false pretences, coerced into taking out a credit card, and left struggling with debt, depression, and lasting problems.

From what you’ve said, it appears you believe I’m solely to blame for what happened, and that exploitation isn’t real. Or perhaps it only applies to certain nationalities. If I were of a different nationality, would your response be more compassionate, or would you still insist that I’m to blame?

Your nationality? What does your nationality have to do with it?
I too have been young and impressionable, made some frankly dreadful choices. But I own them and I learned from them and I don’t try and blame anyone else. That is honestly probably why you feel exhausted. You are trying to spin a narrative that somewhere in you, you know isn’t true.
You weren’t coerced or controlled or trafficked……you made the choice to move to Dubai and take out more credit that you could afford. The fact that you choose to do that based on some bullshit influencers that you saw on line and didn’t do your research before you moved? That is on you. Nationality is irrelevant.
You made some crappy choices, didn’t do your research, it didn’t work out, you paid the price. We’ve all done that, it is so often what you do when you are young and you don’t know any better. Stop trying to rationalise it, you got it wrong. Trying to blame anyone and everyone else for it merely makes you feel out of control. And you are not. You’ve learned, you’ll make better choices moving forward. The end. And STOP watching “influencers” the clue is in the title - they are full of shit!

Bigmove25 · 06/03/2026 21:48

LifeAdminAlways · 06/03/2026 16:46

I wonder if this will affect the tourist industry over the next few years. Who knows what lies ahead, but these events may have an impact on the economy of Dubai and places like Doha in the short to medium term. They will need some decent PR.

People have very short memories. The PR machine will be ramped back up and the splashing of the cash will begin. I'm sure the Beckhams will take a selfie when they need to refuel their private jet at Dubai airport!

Ponoka7 · 06/03/2026 21:53

I have Nigerian friends who have had friends and family go to Dubai and haven't been heard from since. They went on a promise of Nannying, cleaning, housekeeping and driving jobs. No-one in power cares enough to help find out what happened.
However before we get too smug, this is happening in Jersey (and probablyaroundthewhole UK). Google the guy's name and the whole thing is horrific.
www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c87547xle1zo

Lesina · 06/03/2026 21:54

99% of people just want get on. They do what they can to get on. We should accept this with grace. All this politic and social anger is misplaced. Most folk just want to get on,

womendeserveequalhumanrights · 06/03/2026 21:59

Ponoka7 · 06/03/2026 21:53

I have Nigerian friends who have had friends and family go to Dubai and haven't been heard from since. They went on a promise of Nannying, cleaning, housekeeping and driving jobs. No-one in power cares enough to help find out what happened.
However before we get too smug, this is happening in Jersey (and probablyaroundthewhole UK). Google the guy's name and the whole thing is horrific.
www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c87547xle1zo

This is awful but at least there was an inquest and recommendations for change to protect other workers. About half the migrant workers who died in report I linked their cause of death is unknown (and no-one's that bothered about finding out). And they don't seem to have basic work protections, let alone someone auditing their living conditions.

Yes, there is exploitation of workers in the Uk but in general here it is - at least on paper - illegal to do so.

womendeserveequalhumanrights · 06/03/2026 22:00

Lesina · 06/03/2026 21:54

99% of people just want get on. They do what they can to get on. We should accept this with grace. All this politic and social anger is misplaced. Most folk just want to get on,

So using slaves is ok as long as you yourself are 'getting on'? Is that what you're saying? I hope not.

Redpaisley · 06/03/2026 23:39

Your op is a rant I don’t understand. Dubai didn’t work you, you came back. But trying to prove no one is happy there and people are faking happiness because they want to prove their choices are right is not based on facts, and shows your own insecurity perhaps due to the fact it didn’t work out for you so in order to feel better you insist everyone is unhappy and living a bad life.

Also, don’t understand your issue with dogs - and dogs fill parks, all justified under the umbrella of “keeping expats happy.”

About a Filipino nanny, no one would leave their kids behind unless they say doing that improves their lives. So how can you blame an expat or even local hiring this nanny. They didn’t drag her out of her home country to be their kids’ nanny.

Redpaisley · 06/03/2026 23:41

womendeserveequalhumanrights · 06/03/2026 22:00

So using slaves is ok as long as you yourself are 'getting on'? Is that what you're saying? I hope not.

I don’t hear her say that using slave is ok. You are hearing it so can give an answer to show how morally superior you are.

womendeserveequalhumanrights · 06/03/2026 23:46

Redpaisley · 06/03/2026 23:41

I don’t hear her say that using slave is ok. You are hearing it so can give an answer to show how morally superior you are.

No I was just trying to clarify if that was what she meant, actually. Which is what 'I hope not' meant. I don't really understand what people 'getting on' means in this context, other than just trying to make money no matter what though.

You totally misinterpreted my post.

womendeserveequalhumanrights · 06/03/2026 23:47

Redpaisley · 06/03/2026 23:39

Your op is a rant I don’t understand. Dubai didn’t work you, you came back. But trying to prove no one is happy there and people are faking happiness because they want to prove their choices are right is not based on facts, and shows your own insecurity perhaps due to the fact it didn’t work out for you so in order to feel better you insist everyone is unhappy and living a bad life.

Also, don’t understand your issue with dogs - and dogs fill parks, all justified under the umbrella of “keeping expats happy.”

About a Filipino nanny, no one would leave their kids behind unless they say doing that improves their lives. So how can you blame an expat or even local hiring this nanny. They didn’t drag her out of her home country to be their kids’ nanny.

They sort of did if they lied about what she was going to, which is very much OP's point and the point in the reports I linked to. These workers are promised very high salaries but not told about the inhumane conditions they will be expected to endure until they get there.

SpidersAreShitheads · 06/03/2026 23:48

CruCru · 06/03/2026 18:49

The reason people keep mentioning AI is that your original post reads like AI. I understand that this is permitted in MN - if you use AI, it does not automatically mean that you do not believe what you posted.

Putting up an AI post and then telling a bunch of people who don't agree with it that they are "ignorant" is a weird thing to do; it has put people's backs up.

I have no idea who is an influencer and who isn't. I don't think it is a real job. But then I am extremely middle aged.

Can you explain in what way you think the original post reads as AI?

Because it’s long?

Is there certain terminology that makes you think it’s AI?

I’m a professional copywriter and unfortunately am now very familiar with AI. Because AI has killed my industry, many of the jobs left are clients asking for human copywriters to “humanise” AI text. For that reason I’ve seen way more AI copy than I would prefer, and I’ve had to become very familiar with the tells.

I’ve said it earlier on this thread and I’ll say it again: there are none of the obvious AI tells in the OP.

Also, the OP has said she’s a writer so long prose will be second-nature to her.

It’s fine to disagree with the OP. Expressing different opinions is part of what MN is for. But the number of people making sweeping AI accusations because they don’t agree with OP is just ridiculous. Weird even, to use your own terminology.

SadTimesInFife · 07/03/2026 00:09

Delete your social media accounts.
Dont watch the BBC website.
There's nothing any of us can do about a war starting. We vote but it has no effect on the USA. Or Russia.

As for rose tinted glasses. You've called it, for what Dubai is.
The sooner the west moves away from fossil fuels, and reliance on the middle east, the better. Leave them to their toxic sandpit of repression, racism, and tribal violence.

aneelli · 07/03/2026 00:24

I know what you mean. I have family living in dubai and the amount of times they need to remind us about how safe it is there is so bloody ridiculous, like you’ve made your damn point, it’s almost like they get paid to say it!
my feed is also filled with influencers living there and constantly promoting the safety and how amazing the leaders of Dubai are and now what a marvellous job they are doing intercepting every single missile, how they have the best defence system in the world

my family members also praise the leader of Dubai. It makes me think how you would never see the British tagging kier Starmer or any previous PM to let them know how amazing they are and how wonderful they are for the work for our country.

theft does happen in Dubai, the old parts of Dubai, we only see the glitz modern Dubai built on slavery.

HaileyBailey · 07/03/2026 00:29

Notmyreality · 06/03/2026 06:57

Mostly we’re all just sick to death of endless posts on MN about Dubai.

Why click on them then?

JustCabbaggeLooking · 07/03/2026 01:11

Ponoka7 · 06/03/2026 21:53

I have Nigerian friends who have had friends and family go to Dubai and haven't been heard from since. They went on a promise of Nannying, cleaning, housekeeping and driving jobs. No-one in power cares enough to help find out what happened.
However before we get too smug, this is happening in Jersey (and probablyaroundthewhole UK). Google the guy's name and the whole thing is horrific.
www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c87547xle1zo

Utterly shocking! I Hate how the Channel Islands and the Isle of Man manage to be out of jurisdiction. In or out. Fuckers.

JustCabbaggeLooking · 07/03/2026 01:16

womendeserveequalhumanrights · 06/03/2026 21:59

This is awful but at least there was an inquest and recommendations for change to protect other workers. About half the migrant workers who died in report I linked their cause of death is unknown (and no-one's that bothered about finding out). And they don't seem to have basic work protections, let alone someone auditing their living conditions.

Yes, there is exploitation of workers in the Uk but in general here it is - at least on paper - illegal to do so.

Get away! Did you read what the Company owners said in response?
It was fingers in ears "la la la la la la la la la ".